FertileThoughts.com - Infertility, adoption, pregnancy and parenting discussions
Loosing faith in God

Thanks Thanks:  0
Likes Likes:  0
Dislikes Dislikes:  0
Results 1 to 9 of 9
  1. #1
    purple207
    has no status.
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Switzerland
    Posts
    18
    Post Thanks / Like

    Loosing faith in God

    I was born in a Christian family. My mother was a die heart Christian and me and my siblings grew up to know that God is the beginning and the end. I grew up believing that everything happens for a reason and God has a plan for everyone.
    For the past 3.5 years that i have been going through infertility, i have really questioned the existence of God. I have never wanted something so badly in my life and did not get it. I aways believed that God would give me anything i ask from him. For 3.5years i have been in serious pain, crying everyday for a baby to happen in my life, seeing everyone around me getting pregnant, carrying thier pregnancies for 9months and give birth to a child, I AM STILL NOT PREGNANT. I dont know when i will become pregnant, maybe in 10years or maybe never. Where is God in all of these??? Why would God want me to suffer this much? Does anyone else feel this way?


  2. Advertisement


  3. #2
    Akristine
    Hopeful
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    Littleton, Co
    Posts
    41
    Post Thanks / Like
    My Mood
    Happy
    Purple207 - I have a strong faith in God. I understand your frustration - the bible tells us that if we are obedient, if we lift up our fears and our anxieties to God, if we pray faithfully - God will provide. However, as I struggle with infertility myself, there is one thing I keep telling myself - God is all knowing. I think, after one failed IVF cycle and an upcoming frozen embryo transfer - what if God does not give me what I so desperately want? Well, He knows something I do not. Maybe I wouldn't survive childbirth; maybe I am meant to be an advocate for individuals having difficulty adopting (this was a failed attempt for my husband and I, as well). I know this may not be very comforting. But it's what I try to tell myself when things are so bleak....and I just pray harder and ask for comfort.

    I'm so very sorry that you are going through this...that we are all going through this. I just try to see God in all the other things. Remember - He's in the tragedy, too. I promise.

    I hope this helps....
    Likes N/A liked this post


  4. #3
    JAS
    has no status.
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    1,318
    Post Thanks / Like
    My Mood
    Amazed
    I'm so sorry for your pain. I spent 25 years waiting for God to answer my prayer. I watched him answer everyone's


  5. #4
    JAS
    has no status.
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Posts
    1,318
    Post Thanks / Like
    My Mood
    Amazed
    Sorry my daughter sent that before I was done. Anyways he answered everyone around me except me. It hurt. I was so angry I didn't care to ever pray and even more didn't want to ever go to heaven. I felt so betrayed by him. Well I have seen his faithfulness all these years later. He had a plan. It wasn't what I wanted but now I wouldn't trade all seven children he has given me through adoption for being pregnant. I know his ways are not our ways but he knows best and will fulfill his perfect plan in your life. You will one day be a mommy!! Hang in there and keep trusting him.


  6. #5
    KittyGal
    has no status.
    Registered User
    KittyGal's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Posts
    379
    Post Thanks / Like
    I know exactly how you are feeling! I totally went through that as well. I prayed and cryed so much I could not take it, I finally gave up and lost faith in God at one point. I felt bad, about 2 months later I finally conceived with IVF after a few tries.

    BTW, are you seeing a Fertility doctor since you have been trying for sometime?

    Good luck to you warm hugs


  7. #6
    purple207
    has no status.
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Switzerland
    Posts
    18
    Post Thanks / Like
    Thank you so much for your replies and words of comfort. It is such a hard thing for me at the moment. I have already had 2 failed IVFs and on both occassions, i had perfect cycles, good quality embies and good lining but implantation failed. Doctors told me it was badluck and that we should keep trying and will find our luck someday. During my treatment cycles i went down on my knees and begged God to make it happen for me, so that i can be just as happy like everyone else around me. It did not happen. The bible says that God knows WHY. I was diagnosed with some previous infection that caused one of my tubes blocked and the second one narrow, making both tubes not viable for a natural pregnancy. After two failed IVFs, i changed clinic and the new clinic double checked my tubes only to find out that one is open. I thought this was my miracle. He recommended IUI with the one perfect tube before moving to IVF. Imagine, after 6 stimulated cycles with injectables i have only had one folicle on the side with open tube ONCE, and it did not result to a pregnancy. Sometimes i feel like; `Is this badluck or God is trying to tell me something?`
    I know there are many people out there who are going through worse things than me, things i cannot even start to compare infertility with. The bible says that God will never give us a load we cannot carry. I think this load is too much for me to carry, to the point that i am beginning to question the existence of God. One of my colleagues at work is a strong unbeliever in God, she recently gave birth to twins, conceived naturally few months after she got married. Dealing with people like this is hard especially when i have been begging God for years to bless me with just one baby. Sorry for all the rant, i needed somewhere to pour it all out.


  8. #7
    elizabethdennis
    has no status.
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Dec 2012
    Posts
    25
    Post Thanks / Like
    I am so sorry you had to go through all of these purple207. I know there is nothing I can say to make you feel any better. But what scares me is knowing that you are starting to lose your faith in God and that you are doubting his love for you. Please don't. We might not understand how God works but believe that He has a special plan for you. Do not cease praying.

    Hugs to you dear.
    If your children look up to you, you’ve made a success of life’s biggest job. ~ Unknown


  9. #8
    purple207
    has no status.
    Registered User

    Join Date
    Sep 2010
    Location
    Switzerland
    Posts
    18
    Post Thanks / Like
    Thank you elizabethdennis for your words of encouragement.
    Just an update from me, i managed to get pregnant few months ago on my 3rd ivf. Twin pregnancy sadly ended in miscarriage at 8.4weeks. ;-(. Going for FET next month. Please pray for me.
    Me:33 (Tubal infertility) DH:46 (perfect).
    IVF1: June/July 2011 - 13 eggs retrieved, 7 fertilzed, transferd 2 8celled embryos on day 3 = BFN
    IVF2: Aug/Sept 2011 - 13 eggs retrieved, 8 fertilzed, transferd 3 8celled embryos on day 3 = BFN
    IVF3: Starting soon


  10. #9
    HelpAtFertilityAuthority
    has no status.
    Administrator
    HelpAtFertilityAuthority's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Tri-state
    Posts
    2,871
    Post Thanks / Like
    My Mood
    Mellow
    Purple,
    I am so sorry to hear that. I am definitely praying for you and hoping this FET is a successful, sticky baby!

    Kim

    Quote Originally Posted by purple207 View Post
    Thank you elizabethdennis for your words of encouragement.
    Just an update from me, i managed to get pregnant few months ago on my 3rd ivf. Twin pregnancy sadly ended in miscarriage at 8.4weeks. ;-(. Going for FET next month. Please pray for me.
    IVF w/ICSI in April 2010=TWINS!
    SCH, IC, emergency cerclage at 22 weeks
    PTL at 32 weeks, made it to 36 weeks!
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    TTC Baby #3: PCOS, 9% morphology
    Provera and Pregnitude!


    Twitter: @Griffiths1214

    If you need information on multi-cycle savings and financing for IVF or egg freezing, contact our Patient Care Advocates for help or send us a message on our Facebook page.

    Get Fertile Thoughts on your phone: Click for iPhone OR Android

    click to visit my blog:


Similar Threads

  1. Faith in God and uncertainty
    By KelliAnn in forum Pregnancy Loss & Miscarriage
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 05-05-2006, 07:39 PM
  2. FREE Lamb of God video
    By BC-MAV in forum Bargains to share
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 02-13-2005, 05:06 PM
  3. Thank God I wasn't cancelled!!!
    By Aria in forum Frozen Embryo Transfers (FET)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 02-12-2005, 01:12 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
DISCLAIMER: Fertile Thoughts allows advertisers to publish information about their services. Fertile Thoughts does not provide medical advice or endorse any particular service or approach to treating infertility. We encourage people to learn as much as possible about the range of options available before committing to any one. We also encourage users to share their thoughts on all fertility options on our forums.

Forum Stats

  • Forum Members: 97,606
  • Total Threads: 352,301
  • Total Posts: 4,534,772
There are 173 users currently browsing forums.

Advertisement

Visit Our Partner Sites: Fertility Treatments