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Vasectomy at 19?

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  1. #1
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    Vasectomy at 19?

    Newbie here- i hope this is the right forum for this post- ( if its not or someone knows of a different forum that would be better for my issue please let me know id very much appreciate it Anyhow, well here goes.... Im Julie im 39 years old and i have a son who is almost 20 years old who came to me today and told me that he has an appointment (already scheduled for this coming July with a doctor who's already agreed to do this for him) to have a vasectomy. He doesnt have any kids, and although i understand that some people really just dont want children and that its his personal choice to make for his life if he wants to do so.....I just CAN'T get past the fact that hes making this kind of decision at the young age of 19. Really i can't believe that a doctor would even DO a vasectomy on someone his age but regardless it is what it is. I know that vasectomys are supposed to be "reversible" also but i also read that it doesnt always work (reversal). I dont know WHY exactly he feels the need to do this surgery so soon, but he was super defensive right off the bat when i tried to talk to him about that- which means (knowing my son) that im not going to get an answer for that question out of him no matter how hard i might try and if i continue to push it we will just end up fighting about it. With ALL that said, i was wondering if there is anyone on this forum close to my son's age (or at least WAS when they had the surgery) that has gone through with a vasectomy so young and just how you feel about it now? Or maybe one of you KNOWS someone in a similar situation that you wouldn't mind just asking if they were still good with their decision after a few years? Idk just ANY advice pertaining to this would really be helpful right now for me. Even if its all positive advice that it WAS the right desicion and im totally wrong thinking that hes going to regret this decision WHOLE-HEARTEDLY. Because thats what im feeling like is going to happen. Im a mamabear too TOTALLY lol- i only have one child (him) so maybe im just trippin and its not as big of a deal as i think it is.....either way ADVICE is DEFINITELY what i need right now. Thanks in advance.

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  3. #2
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    Does the law have a age requirement for vasectomy? I know some insurance will not pay for a woman to get her tubes tied until she has a certain amount of children or reaches a certain age. Does that apply to men? If yes then you can inform him of that, and informed the doctor that you will take them to court if it's something they're violating. Then the repercussion of that is he (your son) might go to a different place and not tell you where he's going. Maybe just have a conversation with him tell him you just want to understand, acknowledging that it is his decision to make. Ask questions instead of making statements hopefully he won't get defensive. If you cannot find someone to answer the question you asked in here, do your own research and talk to him about if he changes his mind, how much it will cost to reverse siting other complications he may have.
    ME - 38, DH - 45
    IVF - 01/12, ER - 06 Feb, ET - 09 Feb
    BETA #1 - 80.3 (12dp3dt), #2 - 183.6 (15dp3dt) - b/g twins
    Ruptured Membrane 06/16/12 - Maximus
    Born at 23 weeks 03 July 12 - 23 July 12 - Anaya
    FET - March 2014 - BFN
    IVF 2 - 08/2015, ER - 13 Aug, ET 18 Aug
    BETA #1 - 84 (9dp5dt), #2 - 225 (11dp5dt), #3 - 1303 (15dp5dt) - 4/15/16
    FET2 - around 26 Jun 17

  4. #3
    SC-Kelley M.
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    To follow-up on Patient-One's comment, he should call his insurance company and see if it's covered. I know for fertility services, for a woman who is still on her parents' insurance plan (because she is under 26), her insurance won't typically cover fertility treatments for her (that coverage is reserved for the covered member and covered partner, not children). If your son is on your insurance, he may not have coverage. Also, and perhaps more importantly, talk to him about freezing several vials of sperm prior to the vasectomy. He can have it stored at a national storage bank like Fairfax or ReproTech for an indefinite amount of time. There's a storage fee each year, usually a couple hundred dollars, but this can be his fertility insurance in case he changes his mind in the future and a reversal doesn't work.

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