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  1. #1
    trustgod
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    counseling

    Hi ya'll,

    I just emailed my pastor and asked for individual counseling. Please pray that he will respond soon. I am having such a hard time dealing with things right now. As most of you know, I am a youth sponsor and there is a 15 yr old in our youth group that is pg. She keeps coming to me and telling me all about her pg. I don't know what to do. When I said something to another youth sponsor, she scolded me and told me I was taking the 15 yr old's joy and experience from her. How I am doing that, I will never know. Please, please pray that this will help. I really have to find a way to deal with this or I may have to leave the youth ministry for a while.

    Thanks,

    Shanda


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  3. #2
    TracyinMN
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    Hugs to you and I'll say prayers as well.

    It must be so hard to have to be in the middle of a 15 year old with an "unwanted" pregnancy. Please remember that she is young and immature and it would never even occur to her that you suggesting another sponsor has to do with you. In her world, she is the center. She isn't mature enough to realize that her joy might bring someone else pain.

    I'm sorry....
    Tracy
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  4. #3
    Ellie Mae
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    she scolded me and told me I was taking the 15 yr old's joy and experience from her.
    WHAT!!!??????????

    the JOY and EXPERIENCE of a 15 YEAR OLD'S pregnancy???!!!! What is that? There is no JOY to be had in a 15 year old being pregnant!

    Okay...sorry...I am floored. I hope that your pastor calls you back soon. Feel free to post here for support and "guidance" (as you are doing now). In the face fo IF it is hard to take pregnancies of others, especially of those who we all KNOW don't need to be blessed with children.

    You know, in a youth group, if a pregnancy gets celebrated, it tends to lead to MORE youth pregnancies. I am not saying that the pregnant girls (and their partners...it took two) should be ostrasized...but I believe strongly that the word of God on purity and chastity and waiting until marriage needs a stronger focus when these situations come about.

    What is this girl saying to you about her pregnancy?

    Maybe you should sit this girl down one on one and tell her how you feel. Sometimes people (especially teenagers) need a reality check on how their actions affect others.

    I will be praying for you.

    Hugs,
    Heather


    16 15 13 6 5/05






  5. #4
    trustgod
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eli Mae
    What is this girl saying to you about her pregnancy?
    She just comes up to me and tells me about how her baby kicks and what it feels like. She always talks about what he/she will be like when born. Just constant pg talk. I never ask anything, she just volunteers the info. She is just soooooo happy to be pg. She knows my situation - I told the whole church when I announced the infertility ministry to them. Either she wasn't listening or she just plain don't care. I think I may have to get away from Youth for a while, though I will really miss everyone else. I just don't think it is right to treat her differently than the others. She got herself into this, she should deal with it, but the other leaders apparently think different. She is the only one allowed to sit in the comfy chairs during youth service and everything must be comfortable for her at all times. We had a girls sleepover a couple of Fridays ago and everything was about her comfort. I almost went home. This girl is driving me nuts! I think it is the other way around - she is trying to take MY joy away from me and I don't see that happenin'!

    Sorry to be so long, just got on a roll!!

    Shanda


  6. #5
    Dawn
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    I have to agree with Eli Mae...there is no joy in a 15 year old being pg or even planning to parent. She's just a child herself.
    Dawn
    Gracia's Mom
    Accepted referral on 2/18/02
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    Jesus said to him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me. John 14:6

    I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.
    2 Timothy 4:7


  7. #6
    BC-GoMom
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    Maybe she would be better off moved to women's ministry. She is going to need the support of older women in the church... the youth girls are not going to be able to minister to her as a young mom. She chose to enter into an adult relationship and she now has an adult situation. I think she needs to be put into an adult group- not a punishment.... but for appropriate support. Shandra I pray your meeting goes well with your pastor.
    JenC


  8. #7
    Lauriann in SD
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    I am so sorry... I don't know what to say. I will keep you in my prayers and this young teen girl. I know its hard sometimes, for me esp wanting a baby and not being able to physically have a child. (((HUGS)))
    Lauriann Married 12 yrs (10-93) to DH *R*
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    "Live each day as if it is your last."


  9. #8
    BC-GoMom
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    shandra.
    Have you met with your pastor yet?
    You and the young girl were on my mind.
    JenC


  10. #9
    trustgod
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    Smile Praise Report!!!!

    Thanks for thinking of me.

    I met with my pastor Wed night before service. I told him the situations I am facing with the 15 yr. old. I also told him that my sister is pg with the first grandchild and my mom keeps talking about it to me. I tried to explain all the emotions I am having. He asked me point blank - "Are you bitter?" And I said "YES!"

    His advice to me was this -

    "Bitterness in your heart causes your prayers to be hindered because bitterness is not of God. You need to ask God to help you pray for S, the 15 yr old, and your sister. Pray that they have healthy babies and safe deliveries. God will begin to remove the bitterness you as you pray for them. Also, include fasting with your prayers. You have already covered 50% of the problem in stating that you have a problem with bitterness. As you give this bitterness to God, he will begin to heal you emotionally and may heal you physically."

    I believe he gave me really good advice and I am trying to look at all this through a different perspective. I realize I was letting Satan defeat me through this. I WILL NO LONGER ALLOW THAT! I AM A CHILD OF GOD AND BOUGHT BY THE BLOOD OF JESUS. THAT BLOOD HAS ALREADY DEFEATED THE ENEMY! (I am screaming this to Satan as I tell you!) I am standing on the Word of God now and as I pray for these others, I believe God will heal my heart and my body.

    I have decided to take a break from Youth for a while and sit under the Sr. Pastor's teaching on Wed. nights. I want to be completely able to minister to the youth and I think I need to get myself straight before I can do that.

    Love you all,

    Shanda


  11. #10
    BC-GoMom
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    That sound like a wonderful plan.

    The evil one looks for a weakness.. and attacks.

    Stand strong!
    JenC


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