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  1. #1
    Sassafrass
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    Need encouragement

    My son was borh on the 4th with a hearty appetite. I seemed to be doing ok in the hospital, but the past 2 days at home, bf'ing has taken a turn for the worst and part of me wants to throw in the towel... not the decision making part mind you, just the part that feels pain and frustration I could use some sage words words here because books only tell you so much.

    It seems like no matter how well I position him or how calm he is before getting him to breast, it's always just a bit off, especially on the left side so when he latches on it's really painful. I'm thinking he may just suck harder than the average baby and have had a little luck with letting him suck my finger for a few seconds (trying to hold off with a pacifier for another 2 weeks), but the left nipple is still just so sore already. Aside from ice and lanolin, what can I do for that poor nipple?

    So add to my frustration of having huge breasts anyhow and never having a chance to shop for a proper nursing bra so I'm just making do with some (surprisingly comfortable) tight tank tops until I can put myself together enough to go outside, both breasts were very engorged when my milk came in and I now have clogged ducts in both sides but especially the right. I'm trying the warm compresses and massage, but it seems like there are just so many spots that are clogged. My son tends to only want to feed for 10 minutes at a time but occasionally (i.e. around 5am when I'm posting this, why else would I be up!) he'll cluster feed so I'll get to completely drain one side.

    I had DH pick up a pump so I can try and finish off what baby doesn't and I already decided I hate the pump after one day. The Avent Isis. I didn't want to get too fancy because I don't plan on having to pump much beyond an initial frustration... Whoever designed that thing has never breastfed! The parts that create a seal come undone so easily so the suction is too easily lost. Also, the angle of the "neck" makes it so I have to lean forward really far for the milk to flow right into the collection container and not back at the nipple/ detachable part that gets milk underneath it, looses suction when wet and drips all over me! So any recommendations of a pump that does not do those things are greatly welcomed.

    Lastly in my tirade, does anyone elses children sabotauge bfing by trying to suck their fingers WHILE FEEDING? If DS is too eager, he'll try and stick his fingers in his mouth along with the nipple, so I have to swaddle him just right to trap his arms which makes him all the more frustrated.

    So any thoughts on how to get by these things are much needed. I know breastfeeding is the right thing to do and I want to do it 100% but I don't want it to make me cry!


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  3. #2
    JJsmom
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    I only have a small amount of time to reply so I'll fit in what I can and hopefully come back. The Avent Isis is usually a wonderful pump...make sure that the little white circle is put in facing the right direction or nothing will work right. With a large chest, I also had to lean forward with it...I think that's normal.

    As for the finger sucking LOL... sorry, but what memories that brings back. Ds had apparently sucked his fist in utero and would prefer that fist to mommy's breast in a heartbeat... what a battle that was for me. However, it was a battle I CHOSE to win...I refused to let him get the best of me...this was the first time that mommy knew what was better and fought the good fight. That is a difficult battle, but one that can be won.

    Keep those clogs clear...mastitis (breast infection) is not fun and those clogs can lead to that... check out www.askdrsears.com and do a search on clogged ducts and there's info to tell you had to get rid of them.

    for your left breast...try different holds so that he's coming at you and putting pressure on from different directions... your book or that web site I mentioned can give you examples of different holds. Lanolin should help or someone here mentioned chapstick too.

    For bras... I don't know how you feel about used ones, but I have a couple of high quality 42F nursing bras you can have. (I don't have cooties and you could bleach them... ) . If that's your size, PM me and I'll get them to you.

    Good luck and hang in there... your post is what 99% of us here could have written that first month!!!!! Know you are in good company!
    .
    The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it. -- Flannery O'Connor


  4. #3
    JJsmom
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    DUH -- I just realized you posted about breast pads the other day!!!!!

    CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!
    .
    The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it. -- Flannery O'Connor


  5. #4
    3boys2luv
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    First off - Congratulations!!!!

    I'll tell you what I tell all my friends -the first few days are a piece of cake compared to the first 4-6 weeks. They are tired and sleep more the first few days. The next few weeks are spent eating constantly (that's what it felt like to me, anyway).

    I agree that maybe you can find a different position to help with the soreness. Do try to get those plugs out because mastitis is terrible, speaking from experience.

    I can't remember the name of the co. but there are some breast things that you can put on your nipples in your bra - they have this cooling, soothing gel stuff on them and they don't have to be washed off before nursing. The Walgreen's here carries them in their baby section. Maybe you can send your DH to look for them for you. The hospital here also has them - so if all else fails call the hospital there and ask for a lactation consultant or nurse on the postpartum ward and ask her what they are called. They were soothing and a lot less messy than the lanolin. Your nipples will toughen up more - but until then it can really hurt.

    I'm large breasted, too. One thing I did to combat my sons breaking their suction was to use my other hand to literally squish my nipple and breast area right behind the nipple as flat as I could - then kind of push it in their mouths. Not hard, just enough to help them with keeping it in their mouths. Both of my kids seemed to have to build up their mouth muscles and suction for a couple of weeks before they could keep it in there, suck and swallow all on their own OK. Otherwise it was like their mouths got tired and the breast would slip out and they'd get frustrated and irritated and it would go downhill from there.

    I don't know about that pump, sorry. Hopefully you can get it to work better for you. Good luck - and work on those plugs!
    Raising children is like being pecked to death by chickens.






  6. #5
    pattycakemom
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    The breast sandwhich is the best advise I could give as well. With large breast coming at a little bitty mouth, it is about the only way to get it in there.
    Also I had the horrible engorgement this time too. A good way to help is to submerge your breasts in very warm water and try to hand express. http://www.lactationinstitute.org/MANUALEX.html This site will show you exactly how to hand express. You may find this useful at helping to get rid of your clogged ducts too.
    Here is a helpful link to help soften your breasts with engorgement:
    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/...cotterman.html
    Here is some infor on plugged ducts and mastitis:
    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/concerns/mom/mastitis.html
    Also since nipple soreness can be a sign of poor latch/poor suck- you may want to contact an LC and work with her to make sure you can correct the latch.
    And breastfeeding can be so hard in the begining. Just remember what a great job you are doing and how important bm is! And if there is ever anyway I can help even if it is just to listen, PM me. ((HUGS))
    K and R

    7 years IF
    6

    Life is not what we expect or want...Life is about what is. How we respond to what IS makes the difference.
    two miracles:



  7. #6
    MyFabFour
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    One key thing to remember: One day at a time or as I like to think of it, one feeding at a time. I think some Soothies might help like someone mentioned. They sell them at Motherwear also.

    As for clogged ducts. How tight is your shirt? If it binds anywhere, that could exacerbate clogged ducts as well. Not sure a shirt would cause this but I know certain bras do for people so thought I would mention it.

    I have had lots of problems with the Isis as well. I had the old style four years ago and LOVED it! I bought a new one when the old one cracked and I can't ever get the right suction and when I do, most times the white disc pops through and then I have to take the entire thing apart to fix it. Soooo aggravating. I don't know of any other pump that has as good a reputation as the Isis usually does though to recommend.

    As someone said, the first few weeks can be hard but it's soooo worth it. Keep plugging along and only deal with each feeding as it comes. Rub breastmilk on your sore nipples and let them airdry as much as possible. I hope things get better soon for you

    Congrats on your new babe!


  8. #7
    Sassafrass
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    Thank you so much for the links. My efforts will be redoubled! I knew I could count on you all to pick me up


  9. #8
    JJsmom
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    Duh again! Frozen peas or corn!!!! They feel GREAT around a sore breast and conform to fit you perfectly!!!!! I forgot that one! They also refreeze great too (no eating them though )
    .
    The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it. -- Flannery O'Connor


  10. #9
    Sassafrass
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    New day, new woman

    So after reading everything offered here last night, I spent some serious time working on the clogs and pumping. Every time I woke up to feed the baby, I'd do a hot towel first, try and massage/push them some more, feed then cool.
    This morning, I sat up and WOW! I was able to get Titus to eat with little frustration and a lot of good sucking on his part and relatively little pain on my part. He's still not eating enough to empty even one side at a feeding, so I'll be pumping for a while yet. I got the pump figured out too, even a good position so my back doesn't throb by the end of pumping.

    DH is excited at my renewed enthusiasm (pumping in particular) because that means there is a built in opportunity for him to feed the baby too


  11. #10
    3boys2luv
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    Yay! Glad to hear things have improved! Great job Mom!
    Raising children is like being pecked to death by chickens.






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