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Working or not after baby?

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  1. #1
    mcavy
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    Working or not after baby?

    Hi Ladies,
    I guess this can turn into a hot topic of debate, but I always like to hear how others manage family and work life, how it balances, etc. Who plans to work after the baby (or babies?) come? Will it be full-time or part time?

    Myself, I am working part-time now and will continue to work part time after this baby as well, although less hours. being a nurse gives me the option of working non-traditional hours to save on childcare costs and make it possible for me to be home more. I've worked full-time as well, done full-time daycare, too, and had other times when I've hardly worked at all. So I guess I've done most of the options, although i REALLY wish i could afford to be home full-time for the baby's first year of life.

    What are other's plans?
    Michele
    Michele
    PCO, 34 years old
    7 years
    5 years
    14 months
    Forever AHM!


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  3. #2
    Aleks
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    I am very fortunate that I work with my husband and we run our own business. With my dd I took her to work with me part time until she was 1 yr. When she started walking it was impossible to keep her away from cables, computers, phones,etc.. and I had my aunt look after her for day or two a week. She started daycare in Jan when she turned 2.5 and I am very happy with it. I see so many changes in her development and behaviour. I intend to do the same with this baby, except I don't have my aunt anymore so I will have to arrange something when baby will be 1 untill 2 as the daycare starts at 2 years. I might work from home as I just got my "pc anywhere" software and it works pretty good except I am waiting for high speed internet in my area. But I guess I will worry about it when the times comes.

    Aleks
    me-Aleks (33), dh (35)

    3 x (tx with immune issues) 2 beautiful girls on baby aspirin and Fragmin injections:
    #1 Adriana b. July/02
    #2 Anika b. Aug/05 aka "Cookie"
    Forever AHM... LYMI!


  4. #3
    CHRISC
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    I will be working full time until the school year is over in June. After that I plan to take the year off. I can technically take up to two years and still have my job (teaching perk). DH works from home and has flexible hours so that works out well for us. Im just worried that I might go crazy. I have no idea how I will feel. I am also getting sick of his "we have to cut back" speech.
    Chris


  5. #4
    lotus
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    I plan on taking a year or two off. Originally I planned on working part-time, but putting two babies in childcare so I can give all my money to them didnt make sense to us. I cant want to be a SAHM!
    ************
    Jen
    / twins, born 7/12/05

    Proud to be a "used" AHM!


  6. #5
    LynnUS
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    I left corporate life before I had DD. I knew I'd need to be on bedrest and have a million different appt so I just quit for less stress. I've been home full-time ever since. I vowed I would only "work" if I REALLY enjoyed doing it, so I've taken up silversmithing and I do a little jewelry making here and there--now that DD is old enough not to want to eat the beads & stuff.
    I've also spent most of this past year, while DD is in preschool collaborating on a book. Thankfully the initial writing part is done, just have to work on the edits. Those 2 projects are what have kept my brain stimulated as, although I'd never trade motherhood for the world for me it does get hard to spend 24/7 doing the mac & cheese and Gymboree thing. Plus I have to admit I haven't been the best at getting myself into a group of supportive moms. Since I am significantly "older" now, all of my friends' kids are approaching their early teen years. Not too much in common if ya know what I mean!

    Lynn
    EDD: 8/1 IT'S A GIRL!
    JAK, 7/28/05
    MAK, 6/25/01


  7. #6
    sarahp
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    i'm going to be cutting down from full time to part time. my job (as a VNA RN) is very flexible as far as the hours go, and i'll be working only 3 days a week. my cousin will watch the baby 2 days a week, and my mom one day a week. my work days are usually only about 5-6 hrs long, and then i do paperwork in the evenings once dh gets home and can help out with the baby. dh will continue to work full time 8-4:30 at the insurance company he currently works for. we hope it will work out nicely for our family. we don't own our own home, and we would like to, so one of us being fully out of work won't get us to that goal. i can deal working 3 days a week!
    sarah
    Sarah (32) & Bobby (32)
    Cami ~ 6yrs old
    Adam ~ 4yrs old


  8. #7
    babyluv
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    What I have heard from mom's of older kids, is that it's more important actually in some ways to be at home MORE when your kids are older and need rides to afterschool activites, etc. Also, I hate the thought of having my kids come home from public school without me there. That being said, I have continued to work part time for the last 5 years with first and second kids and despite decent salary, it's shocking about how much of it goes to childcare. (nanny and preschool combined!!! egads!!!) I am one of those people who "needs" to work and feel it makes me a better mom for the days I am home. However, number three may well throw a wrench into the plans. Heck, he/she IS a wrench!! But a welcome one!! Anyhow, my motto is, to each her own, and DO NOT JUDGE another woman's shoes. Only she walks in her own (loafers/stilettos/sneakers/spiked heels/comfortable flats)!!! And there is always something going on she doesn't want to discuss (such as, we have a huge loan, we support our impoverished siblings, my husband has no benefits, i really hate staying home, etc) that is behind the real reason she works or stays home!!!

    babyluv
    babyluv
    #3-It's a Boy! EDC 8/26/05
    Breech- Sch c/s 8/15/05
    Oops, didn't make it!
    Thomas James, b 8/3/05


  9. #8
    fairymommy
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    Well with three comming the choice was pretty much made for me. The cost of daycare for all three is more than my income, so that would just be pointless. I have always wanted to be a stay at home mom, but since I was put on disability at 6 weeks because this pregnancy is so high risk, I am really missing work. I am not sure if its work or company that I am missing but I could really use a few 'normal' days before the babies come and I am just not going to get that. I am sure I will be excited once the babies are here!
    Tammie

    Chris I am with you, if I have to hear the "we have to cut back" speech I will freak out. I think thats actually how I first new how psycho I could be!


  10. #9
    Lindey
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    when i had my first i was adamant that i would give up work, there was no way i was going to give somebody else the pleasure of seeing all my sons 'firsts' etc after so long trying to have him, BUT we could not afford for me not to be bringing in any income, so i registered to become a childminder, for a number of reasons, 1) yes the money !!! 2) we knew we would have more kids and wanted ds to be used to sharing me, he is just the best big brother, which i think those early days helped him tremendously 3) i just LOVE kids.

    it was great, and it makes it more worthwhile getting out the paints, playdough, etc when there is more than one, we had a blast. when we moved obviously it was too far for the family to follow, and i was expecting no.2 and mike's buisness was doing way better so we didnt need the extra income any more, so i stopped, but we still hear from the family at christmas etc (i looked after 2 brothers) and matt still remembers them, even though we havent seen them for 3 years.

    but having said that i know alot of kids that just thrive on going to daycare, especially if thier mums work partime they get the best of both worlds, the social interaction with other kids, and thier mums or dads equally.

    so whatever works best for each individual family, there is no right or wrong. just so long as the kids (and the parents, ---happy parents make happy kids) are happy then thats ALL that matters.
    Linda


  11. #10
    mcavy
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    You guys are so great! I was totally lost when we had our first, wanting to stay home and knowing we couldn't afford it (I made more than DH did) I had a bad time with it, actually, which I'm certain contributed to the PPD I suffered. The second time around I knew I had to take care of myself (both mentally and physically) after the baby came, but there was still that financial issue (I was STILL making more than DH) I cut from full-time, 5 days a week, to 4 days a week. Not much of a break, actually. I worked the evening shift at the hospital and DH worked days, so we only needed childcare 3-4 days a week from about 2:30-4:30pm. I REALLY wanted to limit the time the kids weren't with me or DH, if possible, but then again, they needed food and a house and clothes, which my income provided a good portion of those things...it was awful. When DS #2 was about 18 months old, I took a new job outside the hospital that I worked from home mostly, but I had to travel as well (clinical consultant for a large hospital products company based in Chicago) The days I worked from home I could often keep the kids with me, as it was basically answering the phone/email. BUT the times I traveled got rough. I missed them terribly. They were in more daycare than ever before (although my childcare provide is the BEST!!) and it got to me after a year. DH finally got a promotion that required him to travel, so the best thing was for me to go back to non-traditional hours (evening shift) at the hospital part time to work around his travel schedule. I now work 3 evenings/week at the NICU and it's just enough to keep my mind and skills active, but not so much that I'm missing things with my kids either. Actually, having to work some weekend hours helps things, as I'm home more during the week for school functions, doctor's appointments, etc. So I guess after almost 6 years of trying to figure it out, I think this will work even after baby #3 comes. We paid off alot of bills last year I worked full time and that is a huge relief! DH still wants me to work less, and believe me I'm all for it, maybe just every other weekend a couple shifts, but there is still a balance with the finances to consider. I make about $30/hour, so it isn't easy to just find that elsewhere, plus the benefits, etc.
    You ladies sound so at peace with your work/family choices. I wish it hadn't taken me until now to figure it all out It was the biggest struggle I faced after having our first.
    Thanks for sharing!!
    Michele
    PCO, 34 years old
    7 years
    5 years
    14 months
    Forever AHM!


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