New IP

[MeWee]

Hi everyone. After years of trying everything I finally got the first ever positive outcome (albeit with the help of a gestational surrogate)! Today marks 8wk3d and we have had two ultrasounds now with TWO heartbeats (one after a bleeding scare at 6wk5d) and yesterday's showed strong heart rates. I am SO excited yet so scared and cautious! My GS is unfortunately halfway across the country but we stay in contact through the internet and texts plus calls when something comes up.

The 10wk scan is already booked but we haven't had the best luck with that place being helpful. This is her first surrogate pregnancy and my first time too. I am curious how everyone else handled OB appointments and selecting hospitals? Should she inform the OB of the situation and explain anything? Also, I know she had positive experiences with birthing centers rather than hospitals and planned to see a midwife but being twins and with this journey, just knowing an OB is there and the hospital has key resources (including a good NICU) would give me peace of mind.

[KimAtFertilityAuthority]

Hi MeWee,

I just wanted to welcome you to FT! I don't have experience with surrogacy, but I am positive you will find a lot of resources and support here.

Best of luck!

Kim

[babyoneday]

Hi MeWee - My husand and I are seriously considering a gestational serrogat for our 2 remaining frozen embryo's. I would love to know how you found your gestational carrier? How long did it take you once you contacted the facility you went through?

[MeWee]

Hi babyoneday - I used an agency. It was last August that I finally decided to move to a gestational surrogate. In September I was reviewing profiles and started the process with the surro and then I hoped for a January cycle but there were other issues not to do with the agency or surrogate but RE that pushed us to March. Eerily, it is the month that the surro intially hoped for. The agency route is not cheap but it has really given a lot of peace of mind and they have been very helpful with coordination, payments, questions, helping facilitate with lawyers, clinics, etc. Best of luck to you!

[GAgirlinNYC]

CONGRATS!!!! So exciting. Re your question regarding the OB and delivery hospital, that is something my dh and I actually detailed in our contract with our GS. (We haven't started cycling yet - still in the legal mumbo jumbo). Personally I would have her talk to her OB . . . if her OB isn't comfortable with the surrogacy process, I would think better to start having the conversations now . . .as well as where-ever she is going to deliver so that you don't run into any snags when your darling little ones arrive. Just my two cents. Congrats again!!!!!

[BC-Sirell]

Welcome and congratulations!!!

I also would have your surrogate speak to her current OB to ensure he/she is comfortable with all aspects of a surrogate pregnancy. They definitely are a little more complicated than a normal pregnancy.

I delivered all of my surrogate babies at a birthing center with my amazing OB, but it does have a NICU so we were all covered. Since she is currently carrying twins, I really think it would be in everyone's best interest that she deliver where there is a NICU. Twins have a tendency to arrive early and very well may need some assistance from the NICU. The twins I delivered arrived at 37 weeks and one of them had a slight breathing problem so he was in the NICU for just a couple days, but it was so comforting to know that they were there to take care of him.

Keep us posted as you proceed! If you supply your EDD I will add you to our status chart!

Hugs,


Sirell

[BC-MAV]

Just wanted to welcome you to the group! That is exciting you are expecting twins!! I agree with what others have said about going to a place that has a NICU since it is twins. We did gestational surrogacy with an agency (for peace of mind too) and we had plan A if it was normal singleton pregnancy that SM would go to community hospital near her and, plan B if it was a more complicated twin pregnancy that SM would go to Loma Linda that has level 3 NICU. Scenario C was our greatest fear...a freeway birth!

Our SM was able to go to her own OB that delivered all 5 of her kids and he was fine with surrogacy and we also visited the community hospital beforehand. SM was induced at 38 weeks and DS was born without any problems. Hope you are able to talk to your SM about hosptials that can help take care of the twins should they have any difficulties.

[MichiganDad]

Hi MeWee, hope all is going well with you. My wife and I are in the process of freezing embryos within the next week. She was diagnosed with cancer in March, and because of the cancer treatments, she won't be able to carry a baby. Long story short, we were advised by her OBGYN to freeze embryos before treatment begins and to find a Gestational Carrier. If all goes well, we might be going through somebody out of state. Can you tell me some of the obstacles you've encountered using somebody out of state? Everything feels like it's happening so fast, and we feel a bit lost. Thank you for your feedback!

[BC-Sirell]

MichiganDad,

All of my IPs were either out of my state and even out of the country. It's all about communication!!

I'd be more than happy to tell you the surrogate side of this if you'd like. PM me and I'll provide my email address and/or phone number and we can chat!

Hugs,


Sirell

[GAgirlinNYC]

Hi Michigan Dad -

Please feel free to PM me if you have any questions. We're IPs, using a gestational carrier across the country, and part of the reason we are doing so is b/c of my cancer treatments in the past. Prayers to you and your wife and it sounds like you have a phenomenal oncologist b/c so many of them "forget" to tell young women about the risks to their fertility and don't encourage embryo/ova preservation.

Hugs and prayers!