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Need advice!Surrogacy!

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  1. #1
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    Need advice!Surrogacy!

    Hello, everyone! My name is Liana. Someone said that there was nothing better in the world than to see a baby and to hear his/ her laugh. I totally agree with this quotation. Thatís how my husband and I thought years ago. But now, after so many attempts, we canít figure out what to do and how to go on living, since we are so depressed and frustrated. I even donít remember the last time we had fun. We had parties every month; we invited our friends and lived happily. Once my husband and I decided to become parents, but we got disappointed very soon, since every time we tried, something went wrong. To be more specific, I had six miscarriages and there was no hope anymore to give birth to a baby. Every visit to my doctor became a tedious procedure. My doctor prescribed me so many medications. But every pregnancy ended with miscarriage. Every time some symptoms were developing, and we couldnít do anything to solve this problem. It is essential to have good heath to carry and deliver a baby. To tell the truth, we didnít even know the reason of miscarriages! We were always surrounded by our friends. We liked communicating and spending time together. But now we are concerned only about having a baby. Every day we try to enhance our heath, but, frankly speaking, I donít have hope anymore. Yes, I gave up! The relationships between me and my husband are becoming worse. Sometimes, he gets angry at me, but then he understands that I am not the one to be blamed. This problem influences our life very seriously. After so many attempts, we decided to try surrogacy. I have to mention that we live in France, where surrogacy is totally forbidden. We are willing to do everything right, so that we can become legal parents of a baby. We started surfing the Internet. Therefore, we found out so much information about the surrogacy and cheered ourselves up. My husband and I were aimed to achieve a positive result. I mean, we needed to be sure that we would have a baby. And we started our trips to clinics, taking into consideration service, prices etc. We started with the USA. Clinics in the US were really expensive. Thatís why we were ready to try Asian service, and we were so disappointed! When we first came to India, we couldnít believe our eyes! At a guess, we noticed that there was so dirty. Moreover, sanitary conditions were awful! But there were a lot of intended parents who also were trying to use surrogacy. I understand them. We even had a thought to try this service, but then we decided that itís better not to have a baby than to have an ill one. There are so many horrible stories about Indian service and ill children as well. I know that we have to be sure that everything is going to be all right, but I canít. I canít even tell anyone about our problem. I feel down in the mouth! This happens because I can only think about babies, about having one in our family. I know that everything will change if we have a baby. Right now, everything is getting on my nerves, Iím so confused! Girls, please help me to find out useful information about European clinics, their service. What have you tried and what have helped? Describe all pros and cons. We would be so grateful!

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  3. #2
    happily busy :)
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    My Mood
    responded to your other post
    Me-36 (endo 2002), DH-42 (perfect)
    DS (adopted 2004)
    Many IUI- bfn

    IVF#1-4 (2 bfn's 2 chemical's)
    IVF#5 13 ret, 12 mat, 11 fert, 8 biopsy'd = 6 normal frozen for FET
    May 13 FET-BFP- m/c @ 6 weeks
    Sept 13- FET in Oct. cancelled due to surprise BFP!!
    EDD 5/25/2014 (c-section sch. 5/8/14) It's a BOY

  4. #3
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    Dear Liana
    I am feeling very bad that you have faced such uncomfortable situation in India. It seems that you visited an unregistered infertility clinic. there are many clinics in India which could provide world class treatments and for your information India is sky-rocketed in providing surrogacy services with less costs.

  5. #4
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    Hi, Liana! Sorry for what you have faced previously. After a good talk I'm pleased to have some thoughts for you. We’re in the case of DE IVF actually, but a good friend of mine has a baby son from surrogacy in Ukrainian Biotexcom clinic. Here how it went for them.
    The very first thing is that a couple must be officially married in time the first appointment is conducted. They had to show the papers proving that she couldn’t get pregnant. Then they flew to Ukraine, where were met and offered the hotel (for the clinic’s expense!). The next morning they were driven to the clinic where all the necessary testing was done. That very day they also visited their doctor. And there was no language barrier as an interpreter was by their side every minute. So they had a great chance to clarify every single question. After that all the papers were signed and the first sum or money was paid.
    The second appointment was conducted in order to get sperm and retrieve eggs. They used their own eggs too. That day her eggs were fertilized with her husband’s sperm. On the fifth day after that the embryo was transferred to surrogate mother.
    By the way, traditional surrogacy is banned in Ukraine.
    Then they had a two week wait for the pregnancy test. Thanks to God it was positive and their surrogate had the first scan approximately in a month. That was their first time they saw her real!!
    After that every month the surrogate was to come for being scanned. And my friend received every single photo and video from the procedure with translation. On week 32-34 their surrogate came to Kiev and they all waited for the childbirth at the place. Their baby boy was born by planned Caesarean, so they had to stay longer than three days in the clinic.
    Then the surrogate signed the papers of her baby refusal and the deal was almost done. After all the papers in the embassy were ready they flew home.
    She says that program coordinator helps with all documents and there is nothing to worry about. Everything goes pretty fast. As soon as they contacted their manager, they responded immediately and provided them with all information. In a couple of days they received a letter from the clinic with the questions to clarify the required info about her medical history. Also they needed their marriage certificate. After they got all required info they appointed date of their meeting with the doctor. They found surrogate mother for them in 2 months. I think it was really short period of time, especially if to compare with Great Britain, where searching could take a year or even more.
    Hope sincerely this helps.

  6. #5
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    I hadn’t even 1% possibility to conceive a baby(( It’s because of my uterus. From the beginning I know about the end(( But I didn’t give up, mostly due to my husband. It is a big tragedy of my life that I couldn’t bear my child, touch my belly and feel the kicks, care my baby… But Today with the help of surrogacy I am happy mom, I have amazing healthy active daughter, I am really very happy. So, girls, be brave and fight for your happiness! I was also in biotexcom clinic for surrogacy program. And I am very satisfied with final result! I am a mom of healthy active daughter) I paid 30 k euro for economy package and got accommodation, food supply, transportation in Kyiv and the most important unlimited attempts! All of it I received without help of agency which offers it for extra fees. I have dual impressions if talking about service. But it can be because of economy package… Together with hubby we decided that the cheapest package will be ok for us, we hadn’t enough money to pay more. Maybe because of it girls on reception were not so friendly, we didn’t meet any smile) But their achievements in medical sphere are amazing. More and more infertile couples find happiness in this clinic and me too. They are really good, just need to correct some organization things and they will be the best) Of course if I could choose vip the most expensive package, I could be satisfied with everything I think)) but I used economy one and coped with huge lines. I know that positive result is the most important)

  7. #6
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    Surrogacy - assisted reproductive technologies, the application of which in the conception and birth of a child involved three people: 1) genetic father - a person providing his sperm for artificial insemination and in accordance with the baby after birth to take over his father's duties; 2) the genetic mother - the person providing your egg for fertilization and consonants after the birth of a child to take the mother's responsibilities; 3) the surrogate mother - a woman of childbearing age, to agree on a fee or free of charge to bear and give birth to a child from the genetic parents, and does not aspire to the role of the child's mother. In some cases (eg, infertility future foster mother or its complete absence, and if the child is to educate a single father or a gay couple) the surrogate mother may be the genetic mother.

  8. #7
    Walker Martha
    Walker Martha
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    Oh my god, that sounds horrible, but so familiar to my experience. Don't ever give up on becoming a parent!! I'm sure you will find someone to help you. I believe in you and your husband, I want to know how it goes. Carry on girl!

  9. #8
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    Listening all of these posts I really feel happy I was lucky to find a good company. The company is Canadian and they offer also the services in their Ukrainian clinic, and I must say, it is very there, everything is so modern and the service is great. I also wanted to have the programme in the US, but it is really too expensive. But I am happy, my surrogate is pregnant and I pray for my baby every day!

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