Hello Mothers and Mothers to be- Advice Please???

[rjc0704]

Hello and sincere congrats to all of you! I hope to be joining you in a few months! Meanwhile, I hope you will share your experiences and advice!

Because of my age and several chem preg, DH and I are getting the ball rolling with DE program. Because $$ is a factor, we have been looking into the share risk donor programs.

There are alot of good stats available with regards to ET/delivery rates, however, not much as far as: On average how many full donor cycles are needed to delv a baby? I could only find one site that said rarely is a full 2nd cycle needed to retrive additional donor eggs after all fresh and frozen cycles. My uterus is in great shape and they seem to think we will have success.

I was hoping you could share your personal experiences to better help us make the right decision.

I know shared risk gives the security and a better guarentee for a baby, but it is very costly ($52,500 for 6 cycles through Shady Grove in MD-FET included)

With some risk, we could minimize costs and be able to move forward quickly for $38,000 by paying out of pocket for 1,2,or all 3 fixed costs for each additional cycle needed to retrive more eggs. (fixed costs being donor meds, donor screening and donor fees totalling 13,500 per full cycle) or we could wait to afford to pay the inflated all inclusive fixed rate options for 27,500 vs 13,500)

We realize we could potentially move forward now with risk, or wait until we can afford the safest route. We are trying to get a better feel for the risk/probablity of needing more than 1 complete donor cycle for additional eggs if the 1st cycle including any FET does not work.

Again, hoping you will share your personal experiences because it may help us make the right decision. Any feedback is appreciated. Best wishes to you all for great pregnancies and happy healthy babies!

Rhonda 41 / DH 36
TCC #1 3 years
2 Chem Preg- latest July 2007
1 Cancelled IVF Nov 2006 – 7 follies only 1 mature egg
FSH 7.1
DE Cycle – hoping for spring/summer 2008

[tab11]

Hi Rhonda,

Congratulations on making your decision to use DE. I know it can difficult to accept. I think if you spend enough time on this board or the Donor Issues board under Infertility, you will find that many, if not most women have success with one fresh DE cycle. In fact, I've found that many have 100% success, meaning they end up with twins if 2 embryos were transferred. There seem to be very few unlucky women when using DE, especially if you have a healthy uterus and no other problems to speak of. That said, I am one of those unlucky few. I did my 1st DE cycle last fall and got PG, but m/c at 9 weeks. We transferred 2, and I was PG with a singleton. We have 2 frosties from the fresh cycle.

I think your chances are excellent for success with just one cycle, but there aren't any guarantees, which makes your financial decision difficult. I hope this was helpful. Good luck with your upcoming cycle!

[thebabyproject]

We also needed a second fresh DE cycle. We had DE IVF#1 gave us 3 blastocysts so we did one fresh transfer and one FET, both negative. DE#2 was successful, but we had found additional information on my DH's sperm that shed new light on the subject.

That being said, we got pg with a singleton from a 3 embie 3dt and will have to do another cycle if we're crazy enought to TTC#2.

it's a personal decision. I wish you luck deciding what's best for you.

Have you posted on the TTC with donor gametes board here?

Emily

[rjc0704]

Thank you so much Emily and tab11 ! Wow, this is such a tough decsion! I can't even decide what to wear in the morning...let alone this! I just don't think we can gamble with 1 shot.

Now we are considering a shared donor cycle- leaves some ethical debates, but 6 fresh cycles at 37K is doable. But unfortunately, there's a chance at no eggs to freeze and we are kind of hoping to to have a sibling for #1 with same donor.

Thanks for sharing your cycle info with us. I truly pray your preg are going well. Say hi to the babies for me! PINK BLOSSOM is due on my B-day!

[LizC]

Hi
Best thing we ever did! I had 3 m/c's then moved onto DE. We had our daughter after the 1st fresh cycle. We then did a frozen cycle and got pregnant with twins which later lost due to SCH. I am currently 7 months a long with my last DE/FET.

best of luck!!!

Liz

[rjc0704]

Thank you for the well wishes and stats of your cycles. Congrats on both your daughter and latest preg. Sorry for you loss of the twins.

I am so anxious to get started! All this hurry up and wait stuff is brutal...but I know it's worth it!

Take care and say hi to babies for me!

[LizC]

Hi again,
we are lucky to live in a state where IVF treatments are covered. We did have to pay the donor her share etc but again well worth it. It does seem to take forever for things to get moving.

Liz

[yaoming]

Rhonda,

I knew of four women locally that we going to go through a DE cycle... all four got pregnant with their first DE fresh cycle 2 women got twins, two got singletons.... my friend had three friends going through DE cycles all singletons.... all got pregnant first cycle but my friend, she got pregnant with her first FET DE cycle... Everyone thinks they have the best kids....myself included..... he is everything I wanted and more..... I am truely blessed and I wish you the best in your decisions

[KNITWIT]

I wish I had moved to DE earlier. I had 2 failed IVF and1 canceled cycle. I thought about shared risk for my DE cycle -but, it was still cheaper to pay out of pocket for the cycles I needed. I had one canceled DE cycle for poor performance on the part of the donor. The next fresh cycle ended up with my twins and 4 blasts in the freezer. However,many many cycles don't end up with anything to freeze - so don't count on it.

Hope this helps,

KW

[rjc0704]

Thank you so much everyone! Your input is both helpful and hopeful!! It's sooo nice to feel hope again! It's so nice to tear up when I see baby on board signs with happy, hopeful tears instead of helpless, empty tears. I'm sure all know what I mean!

We have decided to take on a little xtra financing for the shared risk. I know most are successful the first time, but the cost of two cyles is = to the six fresh we could get if needed. We don't want that "What if" hanging over us. We are in the final stages of approval, my uterus is perfect and just needs a little baby in it! I am 1/2 way through my mock cycle and then we can secure a donor and move forward soon.

I wish all happy, healthy pregancies and babies!!

Rhonda