2 years ago today (long)

[TamiK]

At this time (1:30am) I was tossing and turning, unable to sleep because of pains. But I had no idea it was labor pain, and thought it was waaaay too early! I thought it was Braxton Hixs. I got up, got ready, and left for work at 7am. On the way I called Tina, and she said maybe I should go get checked out...I was having pains every little bit, and was praying for no red lights! Thinking back....I'm thinking how stupid I was...how could I have not known I was in labor? >insert smacking head smiley here< So I get to L&D, they take me in and check me....5cm dilated, contractions 3-4 minutes apart. What? Are they real contractions? Yes she said, they are real...if we can see them and you can feel them, they are real. That was me. I started crying and called Ryan. They tilted my bed head down to take the pressure off my cervix and said we are going to try to stop your labor. That was at 7:30am. Ryan finally arrived a couple hours later (long drive), and then it was a waiting game. They gave me steroids for the babies lungs. The magnesium stopped the labor for a while, but late afternoon, around 6pm, I got sick, and I think the force of that started the contractions again, and this time they didn't stop. They prepped me for delivery, rushed me in there, and then we waited. And waited. And waited. They kept saying, do you feel like you need to push? Nope. How about now? Nope. About 20 people standing around waiting on me to have these babies. They finally told most of them to go take a break, but don't go too far away. So finally I had to push, and I tried 6 or 7 times, and then they said they may have to use the forceps to get her out. NOPE..wasn't having any of that. She came out with the next push at 9:36pm weighing 1lb 15.5oz. They immediately whisked her away...all I saw was her knee and then they started to try to turn him for delivery. Now that's not something I ever thought I would experience...a whole hand up in there trying to turn him. He would say...No..I'm touching his feet. Nope, not yet, still touching his feet. Anyway, he never did turn, so time for a c-section. They couldn't get the spinal to work, so they finally knocked me out. He was born at 10:34pm weighing 2lbs. The next thing I remember is waking up, and afraid to ask about the babies. DH said he saw both of them, and they were working with them in the NICU. I didn't get to see them until the next afternoon . In my room, I hadn't seen them yet, and they brought in two little cards with their birth information on it, and when I flipped it over I saw these two teeny teeny tiny feet prints about an inch long, and I about freaked out gasping "oh my god, are those their feet prints..there is no way". Well, it wasn't their feet print..it was just something printed on the card...their feet prints were inside. At that point I just didn't know what to expect....I hadn't seen them yet. The first time I saw them, I was afraid to touch them, afraid of hurting their delicate translucent skin. But I did, and I cried. Cried because I had let them down....I didn't protect them and carry them longer. I still cry and am crying now over what they had to go through in their 3 & 4 month stays.

But now, it's 2 years later, and look at them. You can't even tell they were preemies. They have completely caught up physically and developmentally. They are the lights of my life, my joy, and my heart. To hear them yell Mommy, and come running and wrap their arms around me, it makes my life complete.

Happy Birthday to my beautiful little girl Abigail and my handsome little man Caleb. Mommy loves you both so much.

If you ladies made it this far, thank you for letting me ramble down memory lane. I'm a bit emotional tonight, and I needed to get it out. Tomorrow there will be no tears, just lots of laughter and celebration, and I think I am going to "steal" KL's idea, and at their exact moments of birth, I will sneak in tomorrow night and kiss them softly on the cheek, and whisper in their ear Happy Birthday, and that Mommy loves them.

[LindaG]

Tami, oh honey you got me teary! Not sure I have ever heard the whole story of your labor and their delivery. You all went through so much that day and your two babies are now turning two, truly amazing.
I too give Callum kisses at the same time on his b day that he was born, its very special.
Hugs.

[Basilissa]

Praise God for miracles! You have two of the very best!

Happy Birthday Abigail and Caleb!!!

[KMic05]

Tammy, they are truly little miracles. Your story gave me chills because I can also relate to how you must have felt that day But as you said, look at them now! Truly amazing.

Happy Birthday Abigail and Caleb

[JennF]

Tammy,

What an amazing story. I can sense your fright from your words. Your two miracles are such a treasure.

[Mommy2APrincess]

Tammy - I have tears in my eyes from that story!

It is truly amazing! Abigail & Caleb are amazing! YOU, my friend, are amazing! It overwhelms me to see the pictures you've shown of them in the NICU, and to see them today. You are right, you'd never know to look at them what they've been through in their little lives - the strength they have - and what they've overcome. You just see these 2 sweet little ones without a care in world.

I wish for them many many many more years of Happy Birthdays!!

[Cassie R.]

Happy Birthday to you all!

[TinaB]

Tammy I have never walked in your shoes but I felt all your heartache and pain right along with you. You did not let them down. You saved them by delivering early, remember.... Now look. Two amazing and beautiful babies that load your day with love and laughter. You are such a strong and wonderful mother, sister, wife, and friend. Enjoy your special day with your babies..oops..little ones , for they are not babies any more..

[mbelle]

*happy birthday*

[morynn]

Tammy...what a beautiful trip down memory lane! Many s and lots of fun today as you CELEBRATE Abigail and Caleb turning 2!