my son's take on things...

LSteele · 08-04-2008, 08:17 AM

Yesterday DS and I were in the car. I don't remember how the topic came up, but Ryan said, "We're not going to have more babies, are we, Mom?" I said no, it didn't seem like it.

Ryan then sighed happily and said, "That makes us really LUCKY!"
I sort of grinned and said, "How's that, honey?"
"Well, we can just be together, and you don't have to worry about taking care of anyone else, just me."

I agreed that was true.
Then he added, "Besides, I really hate it when babies cry. It would totally mess up whatever we're doing. And they can take your stuff and mess with it. Like Sam's brother, he kept messing up our game. I would hate that. And when babies cry, they wake you up at night. I would not like that at all."

So he's happy. I just need to see things from his perspective...

peako · 08-04-2008, 10:45 AM

When my ds was younger he did not like babies. He was 3 and a neighbor had just had a baby, she was going for a walk and I went over to see the baby when I got back ds said "what were you looking at that gross thing for?", he actually wanted to leave a resturant once because he could "see" a baby from where he was sitting. It was strange as he had had very little interaction with them. All he would say was "they are gross, the cry and eat your toys", now yes once when he was two we did have a friends baby over, it probably did cry and it may have put one of his toys in it's mouth.

When we were considering adoption we took ds to a therapist to see if his dislike was anything to worry about. The therapist asked him to draw a picture of his family, he drew him and his dad sitting at the table, I was serving them while ds' hand. The therapist asked "if you had a baby in the family where would it be", ds' reply was "in the other room"

LSteele · 08-04-2008, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by peako

When we were considering adoption we took ds to a therapist to see if his dislike was anything to worry about. The therapist asked him to draw a picture of his family, he drew him and his dad sitting at the table, I was serving them while ds' hand. The therapist asked "if you had a baby in the family where would it be", ds' reply was "in the other room"

I just LOL here sitting at my desk! That is too funny! I think my son would agree with yours...

**BC-Shelli** · 08-04-2008, 01:24 PM

Quote:

The therapist asked "if you had a baby in the family where would it be", ds' reply was "in the other room"

LOL!!

That about sums up DD's feeling too!

Margarete Anne · 08-05-2008, 02:04 PM

You guys are all doing a great job of considering where your children are out regarding not having siblings. I am an only child, and I can tell you, that as a child, I specifically miss having a sibling. My parents' always, always made sure I had often had a friend with me for outings, sleep-over's, etc. I must point out that the not missing it was not about being a selfish or self-centered child; our life was just our life.

However, I have missed having a sibling or two as an adult. But, who can ever forsee, or do anything about that feeling so far in advance?

Kathy326 · 08-05-2008, 06:24 PM

LOL, these are good ones! Aidan just about kicks the neighbors' kids out of our yard b/c he wants to be alone w/ dh and I. I think that if Aidan could, he'd choose to not have sibs!

Kathy
Mom to Aidan
7/5/05

Nank · 08-13-2008, 10:02 AM

My DS also doesn't like to be around babies either. I'm glad we moved to a new neighborhood where he has friends to play with. It is so much better here.

LindaG · 08-21-2008, 09:08 PM

How cute is he, just love it. WTG Ryan.
Callum isn't too fond of his friends little siblings either!

Just Today · 09-09-2008, 05:50 AM

My ds (turning 10 in 2 days

) also made my heart leap the other day. I had just taken him to a new friend's house and they were throwing a football back & forth. The other boy asked ds how many bros & sis he had and my ds told him that he was an only child. The other boy (also an only--as I were to find out) said "Me too. Aren't we lucky?" and my ds said "YEP!". I never realized it was possible for a heart to smile, but that day my heart broke out the biggest smile I could ever imagine---he truly is a happy & confident kid!

There are still days I wonder (and somewhat ache) for the family that I HAD hoped for (at least 1-2 more kids) and then I have to stop and live in the reality of what life has given us and realize how truly blessed we are. Life is great--really easy w/just one & no guilt because I know we did all that we could to add to this family w/the exception of jumping on the rollercoaster of adoption. It always make me think of the saying "The grass is greener on the other side" and for the most part, I try to remember to & think I have learned to embrace & admire the grass on our side of the fence (and I LOVE LOVE LOVE that ds seems to be also!!!).

juls30 · 09-09-2008, 03:58 PM

this made me smile...

we may be in an only child situation with our 8 month old son, and I am having mixed emotions about it...

But.. this post helped...

Thanks..

08-04-2008, 08:17 AM	#1 (permalink)
LSteele 1000-4999 post queen of hearts Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: outside of Philadelphia, PA Posts: 2,355	my son's take on things... Yesterday DS and I were in the car. I don't remember how the topic came up, but Ryan said, "We're not going to have more babies, are we, Mom?" I said no, it didn't seem like it. Ryan then sighed happily and said, "That makes us really LUCKY!" I sort of grinned and said, "How's that, honey?" "Well, we can just be together, and you don't have to worry about taking care of anyone else, just me." I agreed that was true. Then he added, "Besides, I really hate it when babies cry. It would totally mess up whatever we're doing. And they can take your stuff and mess with it. Like Sam's brother, he kept messing up our game. I would hate that. And when babies cry, they wake you up at night. I would not like that at all." So he's happy. I just need to see things from his perspective... __________________ Laura, mom to Ryan, 8/25/01

08-04-2008, 10:45 AM	#2 (permalink)
peako 5000-9999 post king of hearts Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 9,797	When my ds was younger he did not like babies. He was 3 and a neighbor had just had a baby, she was going for a walk and I went over to see the baby when I got back ds said "what were you looking at that gross thing for?", he actually wanted to leave a resturant once because he could "see" a baby from where he was sitting. It was strange as he had had very little interaction with them. All he would say was "they are gross, the cry and eat your toys", now yes once when he was two we did have a friends baby over, it probably did cry and it may have put one of his toys in it's mouth. When we were considering adoption we took ds to a therapist to see if his dislike was anything to worry about. The therapist asked him to draw a picture of his family, he drew him and his dad sitting at the table, I was serving them while ds' hand. The therapist asked "if you had a baby in the family where would it be", ds' reply was "in the other room" __________________ peako If you don't stand up, you can't fall down. and the Mother of a

08-13-2008, 10:02 AM	#7 (permalink)
Nank 10000-15000 post ace of hearts Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: New Jersey Posts: 14,939 Blog Entries: 478	My DS also doesn't like to be around babies either. I'm glad we moved to a new neighborhood where he has friends to play with. It is so much better here. __________________ Nank Daniel 8 years old

08-21-2008, 09:08 PM	#8 (permalink)
LindaG 1000-4999 post queen of hearts Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Seattle Posts: 3,797	How cute is he, just love it. WTG Ryan. Callum isn't too fond of his friends little siblings either! __________________ Linda DS born March 2004(2nd IVF) after 4 years TTC He lights up my life.....

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08-05-2008, 02:04 PM	#5 (permalink)
Margarete Anne 5000-9999 post king of hearts Join Date: May 2004 Location: Southern California Posts: 5,666	You guys are all doing a great job of considering where your children are out regarding not having siblings. I am an only child, and I can tell you, that as a child, I specifically miss having a sibling. My parents' always, always made sure I had often had a friend with me for outings, sleep-over's, etc. I must point out that the not missing it was not about being a selfish or self-centered child; our life was just our life. However, I have missed having a sibling or two as an adult. But, who can ever forsee, or do anything about that feeling so far in advance?

08-05-2008, 06:24 PM	#6 (permalink)
Kathy326 1000-4999 post queen of hearts Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 2,594	LOL, these are good ones! Aidan just about kicks the neighbors' kids out of our yard b/c he wants to be alone w/ dh and I. I think that if Aidan could, he'd choose to not have sibs! Kathy Mom to Aidan 7/5/05

09-09-2008, 05:50 AM	#9 (permalink)
Just Today 400-499 post 6 of hearts Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 467	My ds (turning 10 in 2 days ) also made my heart leap the other day. I had just taken him to a new friend's house and they were throwing a football back & forth. The other boy asked ds how many bros & sis he had and my ds told him that he was an only child. The other boy (also an only--as I were to find out) said "Me too. Aren't we lucky?" and my ds said "YEP!". I never realized it was possible for a heart to smile, but that day my heart broke out the biggest smile I could ever imagine---he truly is a happy & confident kid! There are still days I wonder (and somewhat ache) for the family that I HAD hoped for (at least 1-2 more kids) and then I have to stop and live in the reality of what life has given us and realize how truly blessed we are. Life is great--really easy w/just one & no guilt because I know we did all that we could to add to this family w/the exception of jumping on the rollercoaster of adoption. It always make me think of the saying "The grass is greener on the other side" and for the most part, I try to remember to & think I have learned to embrace & admire the grass on our side of the fence (and I LOVE LOVE LOVE that ds seems to be also!!!).

09-09-2008, 03:58 PM	#10 (permalink)
juls30 1000-4999 post queen of hearts Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Las Vegas, NV Posts: 2,756	this made me smile... we may be in an only child situation with our 8 month old son, and I am having mixed emotions about it... But.. this post helped... Thanks..