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I don't post often, but lurk and learn so much from you wonderful women. I'm just so upset today. Last night Marc woke up at 1:40 am and didn't go back to sleep until 5 am. I took him downstairs and was holding and rocking him. Even though I was tired I was sitting in the dark with him enjoying just being with him. I was thinking how lucky I am to have him. The house was totally dark and quiet, really peaceful. I often feel I don't get to spend enough one on one time with him, since I have a non-asd eight year old. Well our quiet time was short lived. Marc turned into a little monster. The giggling and jumping around started. He started to pull my hair and scratch at my face, and hitting me. I ended up in tears. My emotions went from how lucky I am to mouring that fact that he is not "normal". I feel terrible today, probably from lack of sleep, and for even thinking I wish he were different. Autism just really stinks! Well sorry for the whinning, I think I just needed to put my thoughts in print.
Thanks for listening,
JennNJ
Marc - 5 - IVF/FET - autistic
Paul - 8 - IUI
Results 1 to 10 of 13
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03-16-2006, 11:42 AM #1
JennNJRegistered Userhas no status.
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It can be so difficult sometimes
JennNJ
Paul - IUI - 12
Marc - IVF/FET - 9 - autistic
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03-16-2006, 11:45 AM #2
LoriRegistered User Over 5,000 Posthas no status.
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I understand and feel your pain everyday...
Some days I think "WOW, Chase is so great" and other days, well, I don't want to say what I think...
Hugs,
LoriLori
"C&N" 9 year old twins
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03-16-2006, 12:46 PM #3
4sweetiesRegistered User Over 5,000 Posthas no status.
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It's so painful! Hugs! I've been there so many times with J. We'll be having a quiet moment and I think we're connecting and he'll do something hurtful or ... well, really autistic and the moment is gone! It seems like if they can't even connect with their own mother what chance do they have! BUT... my moments and his moments don't always coincide- he's come up to me unexpectedly for hugs or a talk. The other day as I was dropping my dd off at school and telling her I loved her, J immediately tells me he loves me " I love you 100 percent, mom!"
J 15
J 13
N 10
M 6
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03-16-2006, 01:11 PM #4
momlaRegistered User Over 5,000 Postnow has a status.
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Yep, we've all been there.
Momla Mommy to
(10), 
(7)
Baby Girl due April 27th!!
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you will land among the stars." ~Les Brown
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03-16-2006, 02:31 PM #5
LouisetteRegistered Usergot accepted into the Family Nurse Practitioner Program for Graduate School starting Fall '11
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Sorry you were having one of those momenets. It's either really terrible or wonderful when it does happen! Sorry it was a little of each. Too bad the good couldn't stay longer for us!
Hugs,
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03-16-2006, 04:39 PM #6
DDVMMRegistered User Over 5,000 Posthas no status.
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DD 9/99 DD 3/01
DS 12/03
DD 7/08
Thyroid Cancer SurvivorSurvivingSTRONG!!
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03-16-2006, 07:16 PM #7
CathyNYRegistered Userhas no status.
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Sounds like a discouraging moment. It's so tough when they act up at night. The next day you've got the exhaustion to cope with on top of everything else.
Cathy
and Nicky, seven years old
There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.
--Beverly Sills
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03-17-2006, 12:55 PM #8
DoreenRegistered User Over 5,000 Posthas no status.
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Sorry for your terrible night....
like Jan said, it's so sad those moments don't last longer or happen more often.
Hope you sleep well tonight.
http://doreenat.blogspot.com/
C & D b.1/23/02 IVF/ICSI, 1st attempt
D. dx'ed w/autism Dec 2002..."not being able to speak is not the same thing as not having anything to say"
J b.3/4/01 gotcha 2/23/07, Stavropol KraiK b.7/12/84, d.11/7/04 an angel soaring high, with no boundariesSuicide is the result of a fatal mental illness
"...letting go of a child is impossible"
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03-17-2006, 07:42 PM #9
BernadetteRegistered Userhas no status.
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Those times can be so tough, I'm sorry. I really understand what you wrote, you aren't alone. I hope you have some better days ahead....
Bernadette
Anna....14
Frederick 10, dx with autism at 27 mo old
Grace 10
Julian 2
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03-18-2006, 10:43 AM #10
CaroFLRegistered Userhas no status.
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I am so sorry that you had a hard night. I also mourn the fact that Jackson is not "normal" all too often. It is so hard sometimes. Sometimes he is right there with me and other times I don't know where his mind is. Hugs to you.
CarolynCarolyn
Madison and Jackson 1/02
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