What do your kids call themselves?

[Lauriann in SD]

Just curious, do they if they are old enough, say they are biracial? I know my dd will tell people she is spanish. She is 4 now and such a character! She says her eyes are like her dads eyes and her hair is like mine.

[archie2]

I've wondered that myself. My husband is Filipino and I'm Black. My girls are only 3 months old right now but I'm planning on having them refer to themselves as Filipino and Black. I was raised to believe that if you are Black and... that you refer to yourself as just Black because that's how the world sees you. I can't do that to my husband. He is just as much a part of them as I am.

[Lexee]

I am AA/Chinese. I am much closer to the AA community and most people will see me as AA. When a person asks me I will tell them that my father is Chinese and mother is AA. I usually assume that I am obviously AA so if they are asking---that is what they want to know. I was surprised once in graduate school when an Asian student asked me why I did not join the Asian students society and only particapted in the AA students society---he wanted to know was I ashamed of being part Asian. It really had never occurred to me--which shows you the strength of my identity with AA community. I joined and really got a lot of insight into the Asian American experience that I did not have before. I live in Asia so I do have a sense of my Asian heritage.

My dh is European and we have one bio son and one adopted son who is AA/CC/His. Not sure what our sons will say they are. The 4 year old seems to know he is not white---but he doesn't have a particularly strong sense of race. I am not inclined to overly focus on it for the time being. He does know he is both French and American.

My thought is that a child must be prepared for being seen as AA if he or she is part AA. They will need to understand the racial dynamic in the US. That said, I think it is important to know about your entire ethnic heritage and as parents we must instill a sense of pride in our children's roots.

I have a girlfriend who has biracial children( East Indian/English) and we joked that if our kids were to get married and have children it really would be difficult to figure out just what they are. We can only hope that by that point it won't matter so much except to decide which holidays to celebrate

[joslynsmom]

I am white and my hubby AA. Our daughter is just small yet, but she looks completely white, not a speck of color, yet just like my step-daughter, she'll probably call herself malado or mixed, whatever she's comfortable with.

[jillgalindo]

I am white and my husband is mexican I tell everyone my daughter is whitexican if they ask. She looks like a little white girl with a little mix so people sometimes ask. My neices are black and mexican and we tell people they are blackexican. My nephews are puerto rican and white and we tell people the are puertowhitecan.

Just little names we have fun with

[maryingermany]

I am Hispanic and Scottish, my Dh is 100% Sicilian.. Our kids correct people all the time when tell them they are white, LOL.. they say umm no, we are mexican and sicilian...

[BC-SgtMom]

Very interesting thread~!

I am one quarter Native American and the rest Euro mix (cauc); my dh is Cauc. I actually do resemble the Indian side some with dark hair and eyes. We adopted a baby who is one half Native American (NA) and half Cauc. At this point she is so young, no one questions whether she is adopted. But we know that she looks just like her birthmother and half brother with gorgeous almond-shaped dark eyes and hair. She will grow up looking NA, although she may be confused for Hispanic, especially in our home state of California.

We are proud that she is a biracial girl and want her to be proud too. We expose her to NA activites (pow wows), music, culture. I do not feel a temendous link to my NA side since my father was so estranged from his family and the reservation by the time we came along, although we did learn how to bead, attended buffalo BBQs, etc. And we have gotten into contact with that side of the family and visit when we can (they are 600 miles away).

So, I wonder what else we can do to foster her racial identity? Just talk to her about it? Help her with responses when people ask "what" she is? We did give her a Native American name which we love and hope she does too!

I was at a get together and our friends new wife said basically that race does not matter and when she sees someone, she just sees an American. I know she is trying to be progressive and non-biased, but doesn't race matter to identity? Is it a way to separate us, bring us together, or both? I know deep questions, but I would love to hear what you all think about this...

Take care,
Kate

PS for Jill - when we found out KS was half German, a friend gave us a term - Germindian - LOL.

[archie2]

Hello Kate,

Congratulations on your DD. I like her name. I think race will always matter. I don't think people can really turn off their instinct to see differences. I wish it were different.

People often joke that with so many biracial kids being born, soon we will all look alike. Considering how many blended babies I've met in my mom groups, sometimes I think they may be right.

I'm Black, and when I grew up if you were Black and anything, you were considered just Black. I have a friend that is a perfect 4 way mix and I used to mess with him and say, "you have to pick one dude, what are you". His dad is 1/2 Filipino and 1/2 Armenian and his mom is 1/2 Mexican and 1/2 German. He would get all flustered and say " I can't, I'm a mix."

When the world is like him, maybe no one will care about race. At the moment, everyone just assumes he's Mexican.

Kim

[BC-Lulu_4]

I was starting to think that this forum was kinda dead. I just had my baby 15 days ago. I'm white and dh is black. Actually, if you wanna know, i'm part German, Irish, Italian and Native American. But i have blond hair and blues eyes so i'm white. DH is part AA and Native American. Our baby looks Asian. Go figure. In our area, there are lots of interracial children, so i'm hoping that when he grows up, it will not be an issue for him. But, my mom keeps telling me that the baby looks nothing like me and that everyone will be thinking i stole him or adopted him.

[IcePrincess]

I am white & Dh is HIspanic.. DS calls himself a Mexican because that is what his dad is and all though he could pass for being white.. he does have like creamy light brown skin so he wants to be like his Daddy and I am fine w/ that.
Here is a picture of him.. see what he looks white or hispanic?

Jose "Joe" (DH) & Danny (DS)

[IMG][/IMG]