It's happened aagin and this time with a vengance

[BC-lisa in venice]

another one of my sweet babies has turned .....into.... (Du-du duuuuuum) a toddler. I remember Sam going from a sweet compliant baby to "Mr. Screechy-man the demon menace" and I knew this stage was coming but I have been in denial. I dealt the biting but tried to ignore what it meant, I rationalized the screaming tantrums, I have tried to explain away the manic behavior (laughing one minute in tears the next) but I have to face the facts: she is several months into toddlerhood and it ain't pretty.

My friends and family remember Nathan as the hyperactive berserker baby. His antic we can now laugh about (15 years can be a great balm). There was the time that an unsuspecting babysitter took the gates off the book shelves to look for a book and went to the bathroom. She came back to every book below three feet in a pile on the floor and Nathan climbing the shelves like a ladder. There was the time he escaped his stroller (while buckled into a five point harness) and ran into a crowd at the Glendale Galleria. I thought he had run into a Mexican restaurant and I had the whole staff looking under table and in the kictchen. He had in fact ran past the restauront and up the down escalator. A very nice older lady saw him jump off and before he could take off she grabbed him and brought him back down. Nathan never went out without a harness after that.

By comparison Rachel and Sam were not that bad. Just normal toddler stuff (well relatively normal if people who eat bugs and fall on the floor and kick their feet when they dissagree with you are the who you are talking about being normal). Rachel refused to eat for several months. She would stand by her high chair with her hands over her mouth shaking her headat meal times. She also was phobic about the bath tub. She put up such a fight at bath time that at one point I realized that I bathed the dog more often than I bathed her. And there was the screaming. If she didn't llike what was happening she would make this sound. Who do I discribe it? Imagine an very high pitched air raid siren that just does not stop. She made banshees envious. Sam was the easiest of the lot except for the biting. He had a basically sweet nature, wehad just been lulled into a false sense of security becasue he had been such a good baby (eat well, slept fairly well and laughed and flirted with everyone) When he got defient and well toddler like it was a surprise.

Unfortunately Miranda seems to be striving to out toddler Nathan. She is high needs (I want it now and I want it my way), "busy" (can you say Dervish?), presistent (stubborn)loves to push limits (dances naked on the diningroom table at least once a day) she is fearless (tries to escape the house and go "exploring" every chance she gets) and she doesn't sleep. I now have to put her diapers on backward to keep them on. Now that she has learned to take her clothes off the diaper is the next thing to go. She seems quite pleased with this new accomplishment, unfortunately using the toilet is not in her new repertoire although she will proudly show you the piddle puddles. And gleefully announce "pee-pee". She climbs EVERYTHING, she runs EVERYWHERE and has become an egineering student. She tests the strength of the materials of everything she gets her hands on, ripping tearing smashing and tossing them. Those are the things she doesn't eat. Ok so she doesn't really eat all of those things, she just chews them up. My older kids can literally say that the "baby ate my homework". There are tooth marks on the furniture and the walls. Speaking of walls, have I mentioned her "artistic" impulses? There is not a wall that she has not "expressed herself" on. There are pen, pencil, crayon and indelable marker scribbles everywhere. She also likes to "edit" books as well. If there is a few minute of queit you can usually find her happily scribbling in a book (after ripping off the cover and eating it). My life right now involves chauffering the older kids around from school to practices to playdates and the rest of the time I am chasing Miranda. I complain bitterly when dh gets home but I get no sympathy. He knows I am a hopeless bucket of squishiness when it comes to that kids. I adore every naughty inch of her. All hail Miranda Kathryn, Mistress of chaos, tiny naked maurader and screechy dimpled one. The "terrible two's" can't be any worse than this.

[Pebbles]

OH Lisa,
You had me rolling on the floor, I have tears in my eyes. I soooo understand WE have Hannah the destroyer, Aka the queen of chaos, AKA The WIld Hannah beast LOL. The years you hate when they are here and love when they are gone. I am trying to remember every story and love every minute. I can't believe how big Miranda has gotten, oh how the time flies.

[HopesPromise]

Oh man, what I have to look forward to!! Cora is only 13 months (today!!!) and is, well we like to call her spirited!!

[KarenJ]

Oh my gosh you had me rolling. I so remember all of that. My little ones favorite activity is to pull all the sheets and covers off her bed and jump as high as she can. She climbs everything that has the tiniest finger hold. She also likes to climb onto any table around and is very fond of taking her shirt off. Sometimes pants and occasionally panties too. One day she came running into my room butt naked doing a little dance saying "mommy, I naked" like it was all the rage. She is the child you never want to leave unattended. I don't even go to the bathroom without her. Of course than she has free reign of the bathroom and has to check out everything. Life is never dull with a toddler. And I am all squishey about it too. I seem to think everything she does is hilarious and of course she feeds on that. I have no one to blame but myself.

What are you going to do? Gotta love them.
Karen

[Jamie D]

Lisa...Lisa...Lisa

I thought you were going to say that Baby Fever has hit you again and all I could do was think of the contract your husband made you sign!

You have such a way with words...you remind me of a Dave Barry type of writer. I swear-you could do a column on parenting!

I have to admit, we have been lucky with Steph. She is still as mild mannered today as she was when we got her!! But with how advanced Mal has been on everything, I can bet we are going to have our hands full with her!

Thanks for sharing! -Jamie

[Jamie D]

Lisa...Lisa...Lisa

I thought you were going to say that Baby Fever has hit you again and all I could do was think of the contract your husband made you sign!

You have such a way with words...you remind me of a Dave Barry type of writer. I swear-you could do a column on parenting!

I have to admit, we have been lucky with Steph. She is still as mild mannered today as she was when we got her!! But with how advanced Mal has been on everything, I can bet we are going to have our hands full with her!

Thanks for sharing! -Jamie

[Pebbles]

Originally posted by ElatedMom
:Oh, but I know the days are coming. I know that sound your daughter makes, because mine has done it a couple times too.

It can only be described as 'An ear-drum rupturing wail 1 miniscule auchtive under the point where only dogs can hear her'

Oh stacia, My dh calls the sound the ear bleeder LOL. and in our house it usually means someone is about to get hurt, usually The wild Hannah beast's sister LOL.

[Mrs M]

Lisa - thanks for the laugh - you have a wonderful way with words and Miranda sounds like one spunky little lady!!! She is such a little cutie - thanks for sharing her picture!!
Sounds like she rules the roost in your home
Sue

[nychris]

I'm telling you, you should be submitting them to parenting magazines..Parenting, Family Fun...whateever else is out there. You have to finance their college education somehow! I love your stories, thanks for the laugh.
Chris

[Taylor'sMommy]

Thank you!! Thank you!! Thank you!!!!!!! You will NEVER know how much you helped me!! Sir Will is a strong one as well. Sweet Taylor pie doesn't even have an inch of what Will has in him. So, to say I was "cruisin' for a bruisin" is an understatement!

God bless us mommies of strong willed, naked as a jaybird, screamin' and (NOT) dreamin', little angels. Shelley