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  1. #1
    JulieB2
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    Ugh...I can't stand lazy people...especially in my line of work!

    As a hospice nurse, I'm constantly on the run during the week. Patients needs, facility needs, family needs fill my day.

    At 445pm I get a call about one of my patients, declining. I already knew this, but instead of sending the oncall nurse (said lazy person) I went. I am off at 5, but just felt like I needed to go. The family was there and in distress.

    I get there, learn this oncall nurse had an admission. I figured, well OK I'll sit with the family, started crisis care, cuz indeed my little guy was actively dying.

    Had lots of emotional support and education moments with the family, got new orders for my guy, started the paperwork. Said lazy nurse calls me and says, oh...did you find anyone to cover the shifts. uhhhh EXCUSE me...thats YOUR job sister, I'm doing your job as well.

    Then she says.... "well i suppose i should get dressed and get my stuff and come on over......with a long drawn out sigh".....

    I swear it took me a minute to recover. The jerkweed (yes....i know...its a word thing with me) hadn't been to do the admission, she hadnt even left her stinkin house!!! THREE hours later.

    Now, I feel blessed to have that time with that lovely family. We laughed and talked about my little guy, shed some tears together....so I didn't mind at all.

    The first thing she says to me when she shows up is..... "well you make sure you make them pay you for the three hours you worked".... WTH...I could give a crap about the 80 odd dollars they 'owe' me.....

    ugh.....took everything i had to hug my family, whisper my goodbyes to the poor man..and not slap that idiot silly......what is WRONG with people...
    Julie
    Busy Mom to my one and only beautiful dd


    "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." ~ Lao Tzu ~


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  3. #2
    LSB
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    I never realized you were a Hospice nurse...may God bless you for the love and support you give to families. I've been involved with Hospice with a couple of close family members, and the Hospice nurses were the most amazing, God-sent angels. I don't think you'll ever truly understand how much you are needed by these familes... You are earning your spot in Heaven!

    That being said, it makes me sick to my stomach someone like *her* is working with families in crisis. She is the exact opposite of what these families need.
    Lee; dh deceased 08/14/04
    4 IVF/ICSI; 5 FETs; 1 IUI
    Alyssa 05/06/01; Jessica 08/18/04; (both from donor sperm-- different donors)
    5 (all from dh's sperm) , including S and J, conjoined twins given back to God 02/14/03


  4. #3
    Lois
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    Oh how frustrating for you. I'm so very glad you went, so the family and patient had someone there. Your co-worker needs to get her priorities straight. Discussing the pay issue in front of the patient was very uncalled for! Was she thinking maybe it was something you could 'quickly" take care of so she wouldn't have to bother going? I work with a hospice company also and it is very hard to find and keep good nurses. It's hard to be on call and have things happen unexpectedly all the time, and its very tough emotionally too. I'm glad you are able to vent safely to us here!
    Lois
    H&S, 10/01, IVF
    R, 10/04, Natural


  5. #4
    MarieL
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    Wow, if that's her attitude, why is she even a hospice nurse?

    I'm sure the family is very thankful for the time you spent with them.
    Marie L, Mama to Marielle, 9 and Rico, 8
    Mom to cancer SURVIVOR!


  6. #5
    nygal
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    Oh oh oh.

    Is there someone you could talk to about "said lazy person"?

    It's not that she's lazy, it's that she's crass.

    You either do this work because it's your calling to help people survive a difficult and emotionally treacherous time, or you DON'T DO THE WORK. It sounds to me like she should not be doing this work.

    She might be perfectly good at many things. But not this.

    God bless you for your time and energy and emotional resonance for this family.

    You know what else strikes me? No matter what line of work we are in - if all we think about is the paycheck, we will not be very good at our jobs. If we rather think about how to be ourselves in the job, how to let our authentic selves make the work - I dunno, reverent is too much for most jobs (though not YOURS!) - but if we truly let our authentic selves do our work - we will imbue it with a dignity and a purpose and a rightness that will make it more satisfying for ourselves and more productive in whatever way is right for that job.

    So she's getting an "F" in hospice nurse, which is dreadful enough - but she's also getting an "F" in being a human being - which is really saddest for her.

    Anyhow - I am so glad it was you there. Was it a child who passed, or an adult? I got the sense of a child from your post, yet then I was thinking maybe when it's an older person similar language might be used due to their ongoing incapacity.

    In any case - I am so so so glad you were there to comfort him and his family. The love was appreciated, I'm sure.

    XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
    LJ born 8/4/04 thanks to the miracle of IVF.



  7. #6
    GirlMom
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    That's sad... really sad! My opinion of hospice nurses is quite high... I think "said lazy person" is in the wrong line of work. Listening to the way you just stopped what you had planned to be there for a family who needed YOU, is what I think of, when I think of a hospice nurse. Certainly not what "said lazy person" seems to represent.

    God bless you... I truly admire what you do!
    Karen (41)
    DH Mike (43)
    DD Olivia (17)
    DD Emma (10)
    8


    Don't tell God how big your storm is, tell your storm how big your God is...


  8. #7
    Terry
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    There's a special place in heaven for people like you.
    Terry - Cancer Survivor- 9 yrs!
    Robert/Max 13 (Identical)
    Asperger's syndrome/ADHD

    “My children aren’t broken; they don’t need to be fixed. They have something special, they can think ‘outside the box’. So what if that’s because they don’t know the box exists. All I need to do is teach them how to deal with all those people who can’t think outside the box.”


  9. #8
    JulieB2
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    Thanks ladies....heh...wasn't fishing for compliments or anything. Hospice IS a hard job, but one of the most rewarding jobs I've ever done.

    My little guy is an adult. He is one of the only people I have ever enjoyed talking sports with. He is just the most sweetest person. I enjoyed every visit with him.

    I worked oncall for a year. It is exceptionally difficult, IF you do it the right way. She doesn't. Period. Monday there is a pow wow scheduled with the administrator and the clinical director, so I imagine there will be some consequences as there should be. Not for me working late, but for the fact that if it wasn't for someone else doing her job, she would have dropped the ball with this family and for our patient. That has a ripple effect. We have jobs because we service our customers. Just like with any other job, poor customer service = no referrals. Basic business. To me though, the more important issue is that we promised this family we would BE there for them, and I was determined to keep that promise.

    ETA...I know I may sound harsh. But when folks are dying, there are no chances for do-overs. We have to get it right each and every time. IMHO anyway.
    Last edited by JulieB2; 05-01-2010 at 10:44 AM.
    Julie
    Busy Mom to my one and only beautiful dd


    "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." ~ Lao Tzu ~


  10. #9
    pattycakemom
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    This post is tearing me up b/c my dad is currently dying. I have met one of his hospice nurses and she was really great.
    What you do is very special and I know you are very good at b/c you care. This other nurse needs to find a different job.
    K and R

    7 years IF
    6

    Life is not what we expect or want...Life is about what is. How we respond to what IS makes the difference.
    two miracles:



  11. #10
    JulieB2
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    Quote Originally Posted by pattycakemom View Post
    This post is tearing me up b/c my dad is currently dying. I have met one of his hospice nurses and she was really great.
    What you do is very special and I know you are very good at b/c you care. This other nurse needs to find a different job.

    I am so sorry I lost my father three years ago April 17. No matter how old we are, the loss of our parents deeply effect us. Our lives go on, but there is a huge hole left there where they were. Nothing about my life from the moment I could remember didn't include my parents. It's so hard to imagine life without them.

    Many healing thoughts to you and your family, and to your dad.
    Julie
    Busy Mom to my one and only beautiful dd


    "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." ~ Lao Tzu ~


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