u/s tomorrow - v. scared

[momofoneson]

I had my last u/s a day earlier than planned, on the 22nd, and I only measured 5w6d, when I should have been around 7w. We only saw a yolk sac, and what my OB 'thought' was a fetal pole. We've been on holiday for a week, and now I have an u/s tomorrow - on my 39th birthday.

I'm petrified that I won't see a h/b. I don't know what I'll do if that's the case. This has been so stressful. Usually dh is a gem, but he doesn't get this one. He thinks it's all good because now we 'know' we can get pg. However, we've been trying for 3 1/2 years with various treatments, and I know my chances of getting pg again are slim to none. He's just mad at me for being so 'cranky.'

I have morning sickness all the time, and complete strangers are asking when I'm due. I have an attachment to this pg - this baby - I'll be so sad if I have to say goodbye.

Sorry to be a bummer - I had to write this down, I feel like I don't have anyone to share this with.

Jan

[BC-GoMom]

Jan,
Hon I am sorry you are having such issues. I pray your birthday is happy and that all will be seen on the u/s as hoped.
I understand your emotional investment. We try so hard for somehting that should be so easy. Eventually it becomes a part of you.

No matter the outcome tomorrow we will be here for you. Dh will be there too. Men sometimes feel so helpless because it is something "they" cannot control or fix and end up acting out to- in their own way They often want rational responses to unrational situations. He'll catch up.

I'll look for an update tomorrow.
Hugs,
JenC

[SamInVero]

Happy early birthday!!!

Just remember that stressing out is not going to help as we don't have control over any of this. Try to relax a bit and have hope that everything will be fine. Your betas look good. Maybe your little bean just had a slow start.
And if it is bad news...your dh is right....you did get pregnant which is a leap for so many of us who have struggled with IF. I haven't had an US yet and I have my 1st on Thursday. I, too, am very nervous that there won't be a HB or that they won't find the sac or etc.etc.etc....but I'm going to try to be positive...as my dh is....and just hope that everything wil be ok. Of course, I am prepared if it's not. Just like we (IF'ers) prepared every single month for that inevitable BFN.....we all have to put up our emotional guards to get through this.
I'm very attached to my little bean too...hopefully we will both get good news this week. Good luck tomorrow!!

[Tia38]

jan -- think positive! you just never know.... so no use fretting ahead of time.

as for dh, right there with you. hope it's not what's going to happen to you, but we got pg last nov only to m/c in dec. dh didn't get it at all.... big sore point (ocaisionally still is). everyone said "at least now you know you can get pg" -- it was no comfort to me at the time. but i did get pg again about 6 months later. and this one is very different from the last, from the very beginning. so i'm thinking good thoughts.

so hope for the best. know that we're here for you whatever happens. and your dh is too, just maybe not exactly how you'd like him to be.

happy birthday early.

-tia

[kimberelli]

Wishing you positive thoughts for tomorrow.
Could they have the date wrong from when you ovulated? Are your cycles 28 days or longer. Maybe you were only 5w6d and at that point you might only see the sac and fetal pole.
Hopefully everything will trun out fine.
Hugs
Kimberly

[ANP]

Wanted to send you lots of strength and +++ thoughts for tomorrow...We are here for you and love to hear all about hte good things your going to see tomorrow.

[kloo]

if this makes you feel any better:

back when i had my first u/s it said i was 4w 6d , then on the same day i went to another dr & had an u/s..it said i was 7w 4d ...now neither of the dr's knew about each other ..so i had to know why this was..i learned that the 2nd u/s i had was way more accurate becuase the machine was way better ..that machine cost $500k ..vs the crappy machine i had for my 1st u/s ..which only cost $40k...and that the 1st dr. wasnt a good one ...lol
then ...i had also had to beg for a hcg test ..the first time they said my numbers were like 480 ..it wasnt til a week later that they called to tell me it was 48000...there was a mistake.


anyways ..now im 14w 1d ..after 11y 11m of infertility

[MelissaS]

Thinking of you today! Happy Birthday. These early u/s are very scary!!

Hugs to you!

[sharond]

Sorry this is so stressful right now. I hope you got great news today and are having a happy birthday.

[momofoneson]

I had a dream last night that we saw a h/b today at 128 bpm, and today we saw a h/b at 128 bpm! I couldn't have asked for a better birthday present! The doctor isn't concerned that I'm measuring behind now that we have a h/b. I go back in 2 wks for another u/s and an 'official' due date. YIPPPEEEE! I can officially breathe again.

Thanks everyone, for your support - it's been a tough few weeks.

Cheers,
Jan