Boy or Girl - Should I find out or not???

[adelaidegal]

Hi,

before I was pregnant I always assumed I would not want to find out the sex of the baby before birth. The minute I found out I was pregnant, I wanted to know right away!! My husband also really wants to know. We should be able to find out in a few weeks, so no dilemma there. Until a friend made an impassioned plea that we NOT find out the sex in advance, saying it was such an amazing surprise to find out at the birth, and it kind of ruined it to find out any sooner (she has two boys, and waited until the birth both times). She's got me rattled, not because she has a different viewpoint, but because I am now concerned that in some small way I might regret finding out too soon .

Once I was pregnant, I kind of figured it would be quite enough of a "surprise" to see a tiny person emerging from my body , and I really wouldn't need any additional surprises!! But now I'm not so sure. I realise this a completely personal decision (like so many pregnancy + parenting issues), but would be very interested in what others think, especially those who have had a baby already, made the choice one way or another, and are happy (or not so happy) with their decision. Thanks.

[mrsc]

I am going to find out, DH and I cannot wait until we can know the sex of the baby. We want to know so that we can narrow the list of names down, such an overwhelming task! Also, so that we can decorate the nursery, I am going to paint a mural on the wall and want to do it accordingly, and so we will not be swamped with green and yellow baby clothes! It is a very personal decision, I personally could not stand waiting, I just want to know!
edd 12/2/06

[Kelpm]

I agee with you mrsc!! I could not stand to wait another 7 months and not know what we were having. This is our first as wel and I want to shop according to the sex of the baby, not very fond of yellow and turquoise in any way.... The wait would kill me.....

[wantsababy2]

We found out because we had to, sort of. You see, DH knows what he's looking at when he looks at an u/s, so we figured if it pops up on the screen, then we know, if not, then we don't and that's OK too. Well, the second the tech put the probe on my belly, there she was in her full glory! This girl has no shame! The tech immeditely lifted the probe off my belly, DH looked at the tech, who looked back at him with her hand over her mouth and I just knew they saw "it." What are the chances of that?! The very first peek!

Anyway, I always wanted to be suprised at the birth, but I knew because of DH we'd probably know earlier. But you know what? I WAS SURPRISED! I just got my surprise 5 months early, that's all.




BTW Kelp, you just HAD to have those eggies under your name, didn't you? Don't you know I am a recovering Cadbury's Mini Eggs Chocoholic?? I was doing so well - a whole week without putting one to my lips, and now you have just caused me to fall off the wagon!!

[jodie35]

with DS#1 we waited until birth to find out, and it was so wonderful when he was finally born and the doctors (we had a few) yelled "BOY!!!!"

with DS#2 we found out on the u/s, and although we were surprised and loved getting the news a little early, it was less dramatic. plus when we called all the family and friends, they already knew it was a boy so the news was he's here and his name is ____.

either way, its wonderful to hear the news. if you're undecided, I suggest you wait. you can always change your mind later in the pregnancy. I have also heard of people asking the u/s tech to write the gender and put in a sealed envelope. then you can open it on a special occasion or with family/friends rather than in the u/s room.

[Kelpm]

Wantsababy~~ So sorry about the eggs... Thanks for a good laugh.....

[oldermama]

HI Adelaidegal:

Again such a personal decision. My story is the same as Jodie35 - 1st child we weren't told (they don't do that for under 35 up here) so it was a surprise (although I felt he was a boy -not that means anything So it was quite thrilling after the horrible emergency c-section to be told the sex.

For this one due to amnio - I asked and then told dh - he was upset as he didn't want to know. It was a bit a let down compared to finding out with our son. But now it's wonderful to know and plan. It is nice to know for preparations and even how what colours you are doing even for things like bedding.

I think Jodie mentioned that someone had them put the sex in an envelope and they open it later - a woman on our due date board just did that and her and dh went out for a nice dinner and then opened it just the two of them so that might be an idea too. Makes it somewhat more special?

Let us know what you decide! Good luck.

Barbara

[smiley]

It is a very personal decision....we ttc for almost 10 years, lost so many pg's early on that when we finally got one to stay put beyond 12 weeks...THAT was the surprise...every day!! We found out the sex on ds wk 13, and almost the same with ds #2...and it was wonderful both times when we found out!! I always thought the same thing...that I wanted to wait until the birth...but when you endure things beyond the norm that make you feel that pg is precarious, everything, every special moment...finding out the sex, feeling the movement, the hiccups, everything is special no matter when!!!

Good luck in your decision!
smiley

[BC-GoMom]

I am /was a planner- I wanted the nursery painted and I wanted to know what sales to shop. I didn't want everything yellow ans green either. I wanted gender specific! Plus we need that much time to discuss names!
JenC

[hanagirl]

I am on my 4th pregnancy. (have 3 children ages 13, 4 and 2). The only one we found out the sex of was the 2 year-old. Yeah, it was fun during the ultrasound, but I'm afraid it didn't hold a candle to getting that ultimate surprise at the birth. I think this is one of life's true surprises and that's why with this one we're holding out til the birth. you'll make the right choice either way . good luck! -K