Anejaculation

[dodiedon]

This seems to be a rare problem but I am at a loss how to deal with it and most importantly get my DH to come to terms with it and find help so we can start a family. I am in my latter 30's my husband is in his early 40's. My husband has a problem with ejaculating. He doesn't do it. I can count the times he has in our marriage on 1 hand and we have been married for 4 years. This is causing me some depression. I have put having a baby off for so long because my husband thinks this is just mind over matter and next month will be the month.

I am at a loss with this i don't know where to begin if anybody has every seen any information related to this problem please pass it on. Thanks.

[momto3angels]

I don't have information on this and haven't expereinced it so I am very sorry that I am unable to help you. Do you know if your husband's lack of ejaculation is emotional or medical?

There is a great book called "Overcoming Male Factor Infertility" I dont know if it addresses the issue you are talking about...I need to dig the book out and check, but perhaps you could go to your local bookstore and see if they carry this book. No need to buy it, just get a cup of coffee and see what it says. That's a great place to start.

Talking about infertility issues when they are male factor can be very sensative and difficult--somehow some men equate this with "manhood" although I don't know why. If your DH's problem is emotional, it will probably be especially difficult to discuss-you may want to seek professional support (I know, easier said then done). If it's medical, sometimes finding out the problem can be half the battle towards solving it.

I know I haven't raelly helped you and I'm sorry. I wish I had better advice to give.

Wishing you the best~

[P.Williams]

I'm assuming that you mean that he does not acheive orgasam either, because if he does but nothing comes out that is an entirely diffrent problem and a UR might be able to help. Otherwise I remember seeing a very long thread about this somewhere, but I can't tell you where it was. Try doing a google search on Delayed Ejaculation and I think you'll find it. I don't know that there were any life altering suggestions but I guess it's worth looking at. The biggest problem seemed to be that very little research is done on the problem, because most men don't complain about it. After all if a guy can make love all night that's more like being a stud then having a problem. Well it is unless you're ttc, then it's a big problem. They have drugs that can fix almost any other problem, but as far as I could tell none that could help that one. (I did see something about welbutrin being of possible help, but no confirmations.) I wish I had better news for you. The only suggestion I can make is if he can ejaculate alone then you could have him catch it in a cup and self inseminate. I know it's not romantic, but a lot of couples do it... then again you could be like us and have MF so that it wouldn't matter how much love making you do IUI or IVF is your only option. I hope you find a solution soon. Baby Dust ~ Patti

[dodiedon]

Thanks to both of you for all the information

[Jann]

If you go the IVF route, a urologist who works in conjunction with your RE can extract sperm through your DH's testicles. I think the procedures's acronym is TESE. Good luck! Jann

Men with spinal cord injuries usually face the same problem. My dh and I are in the same boat as you. Fortunately there is a special vibrator you get to make a man with a spinal cord injury ejaculate normally... I wonder if it works for "normal" men?? You can PM me if you want and I'll tell you more about it.

Krysi