Summer 2011 FET the Second

[kris73]

Hi guys,

I just wanted to start a thread so I can hopefully keep up with the wonderful ladies that I cycled with over the summer.

[smjenn]

Hi Kris - I started an email to your yahoo account and still haven't finished....

I sent MaryE a PM a few weeks ago (just after her remarks were edited) and haven't heard from her.

Unfortunately, the editing has kept me away. I thought this was a forum that I could speak to my friends who were going through the same issues as me. I could go on and on, but will not.

For those summer girls who are expecting, I am so, so happy for you.

For those of you who are still trying - I am right there with you and will keep you in my thoughts.

My best to all of you. Good to chat again. =)

Sarah

[hairwiz]

Hi ladies! It's good to see you all.
smjenn-I'm gonna PM you.

[marianne122]

Sarah - I think we have all had the same thoughts you have had!

Hairwiz - thanks!!

Kris - thanks for starting a new board for us. Glad you're back!

[Lsmama]

Glad to see you Kris, glad to see you will be cycling again. Hair I so hope that you find some wonderful embies soon. I can't imagine how hard it would be to sit and wait for embies. I feel very blessed to have what I do. Sarah, I know exactly how you feel. It has kept me away at a distance. I just feel like I don;t exactly know what it acceptable to say and what isn't. IF is a sensitive topic but helpful to be upfront and honest about it too.

I feel kind of lost since the failed IVF. I'm one of the 'lucky' ones who had success on our first IVF. Mind you I've been through the ringer too with 3 miscarriages, and many failed IUI's. My successful pregnancy wasn't easy either, full of complications, blood thinner shots the whole 9 months to stay pregnant. I went into the FET in April fully expecting it to work, naively. I had the chemical. When it didn't work, I made excuses, It's frozens, I started the cycle still breastfeeding, the quality was poorer. Going into the fresh IVF in August, I had the same hope as the FET, it has to work, it did before. Same protocol, fabulous eggs, all mature, 80% fertilized, and not even a chemical, no implantation attempt at all.

I don't know the answers now. We have a few options going into the net FET. I have had almost every test under the sun. Short of a hysteroscopy and a laparoscopy. Those are the only things I can think that might make this not work now. Maybe theres a polyp, maybe I have endo. The only other possibility I can come up with is that I have immune issues being shaded by my meds for my Crohn's. So I am going to ask for prednisone to be a part of the protocol.

I see the RE on the 27th, and we will find out his opinion on the cycle. I am worried that a lap and hysteroscopy might delay the next try significantly. I will keep you ladies posted on the progress though.

I have Mary on my facebook page, I will let her know you are all thinking about her and wish her the best.

[hairwiz]

Lsmama-Did they not do immune tests after your failed cycles?I do feel like we should be able to talk about what we like.It helps to know that others are going through similar issues.We can help each other.
I hope your RE can give you some answers.I too have Mary on my facebook.

afm-I finally have a couple sets of embies to look at,and hope they are it.It is torture waiting around,and time is just ticking away.It has been even harder since the last cycle didn't work.I turned 40 right after that cycle.When I started ttc I said that I didn't want to have a baby at 40.We know how that went.
It's so good to see everyone.Let's keep in touch.

[Lsmama]

They did do testing hair, but I have been on immune suppressants for many years, so I wonder if any other immune issues I have are being 'treated' by those but not treated enough for successful pregnancy. Just a guess, but really have no idea. I hope those embies are it for you!

[hoping for #1]

kris - thanks for starting this new thread and I'm so glad to hear that you and El are planning another cycle. We will definitely all cheer you on! I hope this is the one for you.

hairwiz - so exciting for some potential embryos. Keep us posted on how things look.

smjenn - looks like you are planning a fresh cycle in Dec? that is great and hope things go well.

lsmama - thanks for passing along our well wishes to maryevelyn. We'll certainly miss her positive comments. I hope you get a new plan in place from your appt. I think having a schedule always helps keep us focused.

AFM, have my first regular appt on Tuesday. I have missed all the attention of my RE and it's been painful waiting 2 weeks for an appointment. anxious to know things are going well and schedule our first trimester screening. I'll be 9 weeks on Sunday!

I know sometimes hearing about these types of things can be painful, so if you prefer me not to post, please let me know. I want to continue supporting you all but also don't want to cause any additional pain.

[marianne122]

hoping - I have had a successful fresh cycle, but going through an fet and hearing a positive outcome makes me happy and hopeful. Keep the good news coming!!!

[kris73]

Sarah - yeah, I totally get what you're saying. That was my problem with it...that and the fact that I had asked time and again about that issue and had been told that it was fine. I just hate that it's kept people away...the thing is, we're all here to get support. And if we can't get the support, then why be here...you know? *hugs*

marianne - you're welcome! Sorry it's taken me a while to get back to this particular thread. I've been having MAJOR issues with one of my SILs.

Lsmama - I hope your appointment with your RE goes well and that you're able to get the answers you need.

hairwiz - I'm so happy that you finally have some embies to look at! Fingers crossed that it all works out!

hoping - I'm just so happy that things are going well for you guys! xx

afm...

Crazy SIL is CRAZY!!!

Some of you may remember that we'd been having problems with her telling us about her and her boyfriend trying to have a baby.

Here's a recap of the past couple of months...keep in mind that ALL of this has happened since we asked her not to tell us ANYTHING about her trying to have a baby...and her saying that she understood.

9 weeks ago, she stood in our living room crying (literally...there were tears) about how she had gotten a negative result on a pregnancy test the day before and that she had gotten her period that morning.

6 weeks ago, she took an ovulation test in our kitchen and proceeded to show El the results and explain it to her. El didn't look at the test, but Joanna said that it showed that she was "transitioning".

On Thomas' birthday (of all days), she tells us that she had another negative pregnancy test and that she'd gotten another period.

Two weeks ago, she called. To tell El that she's pregnant.

At that time, she said she was TEN weeks pregnant.

To make matters worse, she apparently told their mother that she's pregnant while they were in Vietnam. She told their mother THE DAY BEFORE she did the ovulation test in front of us.

W.T.F.??!!??

I defriended her and her boyfriend on facebook that night. Her because I refuse to have someone on my friends list who is a pathological and compulsive liar and does things that are just cruel and inexcusable. I defriended him because the only reason he was on my list was because of her. We have nothing in common and I also figured that it would just be easier.

The next day she was crying to her mother that I had defriended her and that I shouldn't have because this was between her and Louise.

Because apparently, I have no feelings and if I do, they shouldn't matter or something.

Youngest SIL called from Germany on the Friday (the revelation happened on a Tuesday) and said that Joanna was sick because of all of this. Well, whose fault is that? If she hadn't lied then I wouldn't have defriended her...so I said she needed to take responsibility for her actions and THAT was why she's sick. Then youngest SIL said I should just forgive Joanna because she's family.

Seriously? No, I don't. And if she wasn't related to El, I would've cut her out of my life within a week of meeting her because she's TOXIC.

Anyway...I sent Joanna a text last Tuesday saying that I didn't defriend her over the pregnancy, but that I defriended her because I was very hurt, angry, and confused over her behaviour of the past two months if she was nearly 3 months pregnant.

I haven't heard anything back from it.

Last night we went over to see El's parents (the first time we've seen them since all of this erupted) and the boyfriend was there. I asked him if he understood why I defriended them and he said that he did. However, as our conversation progressed, I realized that he didn't. Because he said...

"She knew that you didn't want to know about it, so she was trying to hide it from you guys."

My response to that was..."There's a HUGE difference between hiding something and making sh*t up. If you're hiding something, you don't say anything about it. That's NOT what she did. She lied about two periods, two lots of pregnancy tests, AND an ovulation test...ALL while she was already pregnant and KNEW she was pregnant."

There wasn't much he could say to that. So what he said was "Well, you know Jo. Jo will be Jo."

This is what I ALWAYS hear when Joanna does something that is just inexcusable. "Jo will be Jo" or "It's just Joanna being Joanna" or "Well, you know...she does have this mental illness..."

Yeah, I get that. I do.

But, there's only so many times that you can use those NON-excuses before I just don't give a sh*t anymore. And it's not like she's really doing anything to help with her mental problems. I'm pretty sure that lying and making sh*t up isn't a bulletpoint in her therapy paperwork of how to try to get better.

I'm pretty much done with her. I can't believe a word out of her mouth and all she's done for the nearly 8 years that I've known her is lie to me over just about everything. I can't have someone like that in my life anymore. Yeah, I know she's still around because she's El's sister...but, I don't have to tell her anything about what's going on with me or anything else.

What she's done this time is just so far beyond wrong and horrible and bad that I don't even know how to classify it anymore. And for people to just sweep it under the rug because "you know how Joanna is" is just...OMFG!

So, yeah...

This is the main reason I haven't been around very much.

I'm sorry for the novella-length post...