Just so you know, I'm already choked up as I'm typing this post. I still get that way when I think back on my IVF journey and more importantly when I think about my little miracle sleeping in the next room.
My history: After endless bloodtests, injections, sonograms, tears, bills, phonecalls, research, miles in the car, and did I mention tears ? I gave birth to our beautiful son Dylan after our 4th IVF attempt (5 if you count the one that was converted to an IUI ON WHAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE DAY OF RETRIEVAL )
My beta was a whopping 59 (I'm being sarcastic here) at 11dpt. It was the first ever positive anything that I had connected with trying to get pregnant. The date that I received that phone call (November 13th) is as special to me as the day we had our first pregnancy u/s and probably even the day we gave birth. BUT like everything else connected to my IF, even that good news was followed by drama - my beta was not doubling. My second beta was only 79 and I was told there was not much hope. I lived in beta hell for a good solid week - going in every other day for bloodtests, each time the number being just shy of doubling...but I refused to believe that this was not real - I never prayed so hard in my entire life...
We went for our first u/s and I remember how nervous I was sitting in that waiting room...knowing that my beta was not as strong as hoped, knowing that I could possibly be looking at an ectopic or chemical pregnancy, knowing the joy I had felt for a couple of weeks (yes even through the uncertain betas - after all I was PREGNANT) could possibly come to a screeching halt if we didn't see anything on that screen.
Well, you can imagine my shock when the doctor said "Do you want to talk about twin A or twin B first?" Yes- not only was there one heartbeat, but there were two! We saw those beautiful little flickers once more at our clinic and once again at my Peri's office. Sadly, at my 12 week u/s, we discovered that twin A had stopped developing. I was shocked - had no symptoms at all of a miscarriage. So for us, twin "A" will always stand for "Angel".
The remainder of my pregnancy was blissfully uneventful and Dylan was born on July 20th, 2001 at 11:58 p.m.
So...lessons learned to share with you all....hmmm...
Be sure you feel like you are in competent hands. Infertility takes such a toll both financially and emotionally and the least we should have is doctors and nurses who care. I did my first 2 IVFs (and the one that was converted to an IUI) in a clinic that was unorganized, uncaring, and basically incompetent. I stayed because they excepted my insurance - period. However what they cost me emotionally I cannot even put a price on. I later switched to Cornell and became pregnant on my second cycle there.
Secondly, if you are the praying type, pray hard. Saint Gerard and Saint Jude did wonders for me....
Be sure to lean on one another here for all the support you need. I didn't know about FT for all my failed attempts, and I'm convinced that partly why the last one worked is because of the friendships I made here. I spent A LOT of time on the IVF board. When my beta wasn't doubling, SusanNJ started a prayer chain for me that I know was heard loud and clear...and gave me such peace of mind knowing that all those folks cared so much.
Lastly - I promise, promise, promise, that when you achieve your dream of parenthood (however you wind up going about it) that you will forget the heartache of the journey that got you there. I'm not saying that you will forget the whole experience - which IMO you won't want to because of the strength you gain in the process...you won't forget the friends who were there for you or the posts here that made a difference, or the tears of wanting something so very badly, but all the other stuff? The injections, the appointments, the travel, the 2ww - vague memories at best.
I must really mean that last one - because my plan right now is to cycle again in February. Yes, I can't believe it, but I'm coming back for more (that is if my clinic will take me - I'm kind of OLD! ) I put in a call to my patient coordinator and I'm waiting to hear back. So...I may in fact be spending quite a bit of time with you ladies in the near future!
I wish you all the best of luck with your cycles....I truly and with all my heart do. If I can ever be of any help, you can find me on the General Parenting board.
Results 21 to 30 of 81
11-20-2002, 09:02 AM #21JoanneNYRegistered User Over 5,000 PostLong time FTer
- Join Date
- Jan 2002
- Blog Entries
Dylan ~ 9 years old and his ^i^ twin
"All great ideas were crazy before they were brilliant."
11-20-2002, 11:08 AM #22
We were 'finally' successful after 9 years of ttc, 4 IUI's and 3 IVF's. It was a heck of a long road but I can tell you it was worth every tear, every Dr. appt, every dollar we spent, every surgery, every test and the extremely long wait. I truly believe you all will get pregnant if you are stubborn enough not to 'ever' give up!!!
We had the dreaded 'unexplained' diagnosis. Went through the whole drill of testing, had a couple surgeries to remove uterine polyps and a couple laps. Nothing was ever found. Dh always had great sperm analysis numbers and everything seemed great. We tried and tried but nothing. Went to several different Dr.'s and they all suggested IVF. We were exhausted emotionally, had no IVF insurance coverage and just decided to take a break while saving for the procedure.
I was 35 and dh was 37 when we started the IVF's. We found a clinic that offered a money back guarantee on 3 cycles and went for that. The first round I had 20 eggs but 'no' fertilization. We couldn't believe it but finally were told that a problem had been found and we were no longer unexplained. We thought ok we are just not getting fertilization and can go the ICSI route and be fine. They did 'rescue ICSI' the second day and got 4 fertilized. We transferred all but no success. 2nd IVF we retrieved 22 eggs and with ICSI got 4 to fertilize. The embryos just didn't look that great and we transferred them all with no success again. We were told by our embryologist that he felt we were dealing with a male factor DNA problem that kept an embryo from developing past a certain stage. He said he was 99.9% sure that had been our problem all along. He wanted us to attempt the 3rd cycle and if not successful he would send a sperm sample to a clinic in South Dakota to test for this. With heavy hearts we went thru our 3rd cycle just knowing it was over. This time I retrieved 15 eggs, 4 were fertilized with ICSI and we showed up for transfer very down. We couldn't believe our embies looked great this time!! We had 3 (8 cell) and 1 (6 cell) all good quality. We transferred them all and again had hope. It finally worked and we now have 2 precious baby girls!!!!
The meds I took for each cycle were:
Baby Aspirin and Prenatal
On the third cycle Heparin and Prednisone were added to help with implantation. I truly think this made the difference.
I'm sorry this is so short but I really wanted to post here and am trying to hurry. If any of you have any questions for me I'd be more than happy to help in any way I can. I'll leave my email address... firstname.lastname@example.org
If I had one piece of advice for anyone going thru the struggle of infertility it would be 'DON'T GIVE UP'!!! I know it beats you up something terrible and the emotional abuse is so hard to deal with. Miracles DO happen and success can be achieved with determination and the will to make it happen.
Victory is sweetest to those who have known defeat!!!!
Please take care of yourselves and I wish each and every one of you all the best with your journey to becoming a Mother. Their are a lot of unborn babes just waiting on you special ladies to be their Mom. Hang tough, it will happen!!
11-20-2002, 01:31 PM #23JillianRegistered Userhas no status.
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- Jan 2002
- Chapel Hill, NC
This is not my personal story but one of a friend. it has inspired so many times through my treatment and I hope it does you. Miracles happen every single day and provide us all with the hope we need.
You're all in my thoughts and prayers!!
My friend began ttc at the age if 32. Went one year, nothing happened. COnsulted her OB, who ran some preliminary tests and found nothing wrong. She started taking clomid and tracking her temps. She went another year, nothing happened. Her OB sent her to an RE. He ran tests, found absolutely nothing wrong. They began injectibles with IUI's. EVery month she would have a perfect cycle with beautiful follies...and then a negative. She started to worry. She turned 35. She really began to worry. SHe and her dh decided to be aggressive and go to IVF, in spite of still having NO diagnosis and having done every test imaginable.
For the next 5 years (yep 5) they did 9 IVF's, off and on as her body and their mental health would let them. Every single one looked perfect-great fertilization, more embies put back every time. On her last try she had 7 put back. She was 39 and it was her 9th try. It was negative.
Now they were broken hearted and broke. They had spent over 100,000 on IF treatment. She was 40. They cried, they talked, they gave up. It was devastating for them and their family.
Fast forward one year. My friend is sick. She has been traveling for the career she has thrown herself into (to pay off debt and refocus her life). Finally, in a distant city, she is so sick, she goes to the hospital fearing she has the flu.
At the age of 41, after 9 years of IF and aggressive treatment, she is told she is pregnant. Completely naturally.
Her son was born perfect and healthy and amazingly enough, this past June, he had a little sister join him-14 months after he entered the world. Completely naturally.
Her doctors still cannot explain it. They were all thrilled for her. She said her OB cried with her when she delivered and said it was the most amazing delivery she had ever done.
I know this isn't your typical veteran sucess story, but it is very real and inspired me beyone belief. I'm crying as I type this because it still amazes me.
I hope everyone of you will have an amazing success story to share. Best of luck to each of you.Jillian
Mom to my two sets of miracles!
11-20-2002, 10:02 PM #24
Thank you very very much for sharing your amazing success stories...Could't stop crying whenever i read a new post here...So affecting! However, It makes me feel more optimistic and strong to kick the despair out of my heart and get ready for my next IVF#7.
Thank you once again..Wish all of you the best of luck
Special thanks to Christine for this great idea
Marwame 27 and DH 37
Severe male factor(Zero to very few sperms)
No Female one
5 IVF/ICSI (all negative)
IVF/ICSI #6 10/31 Negative
11-23-2002, 04:33 PM #25DianneSRegistered Userhas no status.
- Join Date
- May 2002
FET w/AH at 39, edd 2/3/03
Just in case there is someone like me who needs a bit of encouragement but have to say the prievious posts are amazing and wonderful. Truely offering hope.
Me 39, DH 39 been trying since 35 thinking we would just get pg on first try...lol!. Other issues, over weight, FSH over 13.
At 38 we sought out an RE and discovered I had tubal issues. Due to this we did not attempt any IUI's and went straight to IVF #1.
IVF attempt #1, Suppressed using b/c then proticol using Lupron and 7 follistim amps per day. Had 5 follies but none made it to retrival all absorbed back into ovaries. Had no idea what was really going on just following my RE's directions.
IVF attempt #2, Aggressive drug proticol and acupunture, again suppression using b/c , lupron, and a mix of up to 14 ampuals of follistim and 4 re****ex per day (kept increasing dosage through the 12 days prior to retrival) no follicles developed for retrival, FSH over 13.
IVF #3 w/donor eggs. Transferred 4 perfect 8 cell grade 1 embies at 5 day blast, lining at 11. Beta Negative (RE said would have bet his practice on a postive beta). Use b/c suppression and lupron prior to transfer.
FET #4 5 embies made it through thaw, only 1 8-cell all others lower grade, transferred all 5 used assisted hatching, Beta Positive, edd 2/3/03, singleton. This was the first time I took control of transfer schedule and did not let the RE dictate the timing of transfer. I did not use b/c to suppress instead went on my own cycle timing, also delayed lupron until after af started. Used a valuim for proceedure and seduced dh into the baby dance morning of transfer.
Lessons I learned from this experience:
1. Go with your instincts, I never liked using b/c to suppress and alter my cycle to my RE's schedule. I would not do this again had I been more informed about IVF issues.
2. For me a good fresh lining probably helped, by not using lupron until af started I had the heaviest flow ever assuring me I had a fresh lining for the transfer.
3. Definately do the baby dance prior to transfer so uterous will not freak out and try to reject transfer also take that valuim and relax.
4. I believe AH was a helping factor although I think the fresh lining and baby dancing were more so.
Of course this is my story and just my opinion of what may have helped me and what may have hindered me. I do wish the ladies here all the best in there experiences and hope this has helped someone.
12-05-2002, 10:26 AM #26matildaRegistered Userhas no status.
- Join Date
- Jan 2002
I just want to say that as i'm getting ready to start IVF#4 and am looking for reasons to keep going, these success stories give me so much strength! You ladies are all such strong, wonderful people and i hope you realize how much inspiration you give to so many people on these boards. Thank you!!! And please keep the success stories coming. I hope to be posting mine on here someday!Matilda
5 unsuccessful IVF's but successful on DFET
12-08-2002, 09:44 AM #27AutumnRegistered Userhas no status.
- Join Date
- Nov 2002
Hi Lesa - I'm pretty new to this board and have been ttc for 4 years now. Have had 6 failed IUI's and 4 failed IVFs. My new RE also doesn't agree with any Immune issues. I was diagnosed by Dr. Beer with having Natural Killer cells and he recommended I do IVIG with my last IVF but I followed my RE's recommendation and didn't do it. Now I'm desperate and thinking of going to see Dr. Sher. It doesnt seem that they are as expensive as Dr. Beer. Dr. Beer charged me $250 for a 15 minute telephone consultation! Please give me more advise about Dr. Sher and his practice. I'm seriously thinking about going there after reading some of the success stories of a few women on this board. Thanks for your time. Autumn
12-12-2002, 03:52 PM #28LisaJoanRegistered Userhas no status.
- Join Date
- Jan 2002
- Bay Area
I don't necessarily qualify as a "veteran" ivfer, but I did do one cycle and was successful. My story:
I started out IF doing 5 cycles of Clomid/IUI with one successful pregnancy that ended in m/c at 8 weeks. I then moved onto IVF, still unexplained. After gettting my FSH tested again (had it tested 3 times, always 7-9 range) it came back at 13. So, they warned me at the clinic that I should start thinking about doner eggs, after doing antagon/follistim and only having 7 eggs to retrieve. I was bummed, to say the least, but after day 3, I had 2 good eggs 7B and 8B and 2 that had 1 PN (1 pro nuclei, so they were not sure they were viable, but put them back anyway) that were 4 and 6 cell.
Well, here I am at 28 weeks, so even if your cycle doesnt seem to be going that well, there is still hope! All you need is one good egg, and even there, it doesnt have to be perfect!
Its a girl!37
5 failed IUIs
IVF#1 Successful! Hannah b 3/10/03
IVF#2 BFP! 7w5d confirmed Blighted ovum(s)
IVF#3 CANCELLED...too few eggs - converted to IUI
12-27-2002, 10:39 AM #29virgaRegistered User Over 5,000 Posthas no status.
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- Jan 2002
- my beloved living Earth
- Blog Entries
I just love to read these stories! Here's mine:
Our dx is male factor and I have immune issues. For our first IVF/ICSI, nine eggs fertilized (out of twelve) and two made it to blast, they were beautiful. we transferred both, but neither made it.
For our second IVF/ICSI, my Dr. suggested PLIs/LITs (DHs white blood cells injected into my stomach with hopes it would create antibodies and leave the embryos alone), which we did twice before retrieval. Again, twelve eggs were retrieved, nine fertilized, but this time we did a 24 hour (2pn) transfer. We transferred five and froze the remaining four. I delivered a beautiful baby boy on May 1, 2001.
Now we are trying for a sibling for DS...wish us luck.
I sure wish the best for all of you.
SandiaMom to ~
Daughter 8/91; Son 5/01; Son 12/03; Son b/d 8/07 at 16 weeks (unknown cause, possibly his own antibodies)
Four itty-bitty angels that I will know again.
Brindle Boxer - Zabine 7/11/09
01-10-2003, 01:27 PM #30KimNYRegistered Userhas no status.
- Join Date
- Oct 2002
IVF #7 was the one!
I will try to make this short.
My Dx was unexplained.
I started with 9 iui, then did IVF x2.
#2 pos but ectopic surgery removed right tube
#4neg- then did 2FET frozen embryo Tran both Neg
#6 switched to Cornell and did co culture- neg
#7 Only two embrios Fertilized had trans in Manhattan on Sept 12th day after the disaster. POSITIVE!!!!! My beautiful little Girl is 7months old.
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