What happened to my 3 little survivors??? (warn. Long!)

[penny427]

Kathy....

I think its too early to test as well. I had low E2 and my RE said it was nothing to be concerned about. I did get a BFN but he told me that many many women have low E2 and are pregnant and have healthy pregnancies. I hpt'd and got a faint positive that was gone by the time I got home from work so it wasnt a real + anyways. At that point I convinced myself it was negative which I shouldnt have done. I believe in the power of positive thinking and also prayer. I will be praying many prayers for you and your little ones and I will be checking back to see how high your beta is!! Have faith and whatever you do..dont give up!!!

Penny

[Maribelle]

Kathy,

I was just wondering yesterday how you are doing. No matter what happens, remember that feeling in your heart that told you this WILL happen. You already know your own destiny, just not the timeline. That feeling does not lie. If you are not PG now, somehow you will find a way to do it again. People who shine like you draw good luck and opportunity, and God will find away to make it happen, just like you know He will in your heart.
I truly believe you will be a mommy someday,hopefully in about 9 months!

Mari

[kathyMullins001]

I was wondering about you too yesterday Mari!!! And to see if you've been on is the reason I signed on this morning! How are you holding up? This 2ww is tough, especially when you don't know what is going on!!!!

I'm doing much better today than I was at the begining of yesterday!!! But my HPT's are running just like yours... and I'm only one day behind you! I am really trying to keep hope alive that we will both be one of these ones that just don't show up on HPTs for what ever reason!

[Anira]

Kathy & Mari

to you both!

I wish there was some "automatic" way of finding out if our embies stuck! It's so unfair...this waiting...it seems like all we do these days is wait...

[kathyMullins001]

Well, unfortunately, I am very sad to say, this cycle is pretty much over. I am now 11dp3dt and used the first morning urine to a F.R.E.D. big ol negative... I've used Answer Early too and same thing... Yes, you can get false positives with Chemical pregnancies, and you can get false negatives when its too early, but by day 11, if my beta levels aren't high enough for a F.R.E.D to pick up, then its pretty clear, I'm simply not pregnant.
I had my bawling cry with DH last night, and I feel somewhat better today. I just plan on trying to stay really busy and trying to imerse myself in all the things I couldn't do while cycling.

Thank you so much, to all of you for your support, to me, and to each other. Its so very important for us to have each other. I don't know how I could have gotten through this cycle without this site. Unfortunately, this is the end of the road for us. there won't be another try in our future... but I will continue to lurk, and live vicariously through other's BFPs!

[SomedayMommy]

For Kathy, Anira, and Mari - PLEASE gals, I would LOVE for you all to prove the evil HPT wrong. Now, I have no room to lecture or to talk, I am a self-proclaimed addict.

But I hope that the sticks are wrong..................

[brookles76]

Hoping you do all get positive betas as well!!!!.....Evil HPT sticks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[kathyMullins001]

F.R.E.D. and Answer Early 12dp3dt HPTs = Neg.

I'm trying to see if I can take my beta today, to save myself from the weekend of shots. I know its over. I already broke the news out yesterday to the few people I told about us TTC that the IVF didn't work. DH and I don't think we will try again due to the $$$. We went into debt for this try, and would really bury ourselves majorly to try again... obviously, still with no guarentees. So guess its a no go... we are both really sad, but moving on. I can not second guess what Gods plans are for DH and I... I would love to share our love with a baby or child... would love to adopt too, but that is not easy either, and not in-expensive either. If anyone has any information on how you can adopt a baby or child, how can you find them? Is there anyway to do it if you don't have tons of $$$$???? PLEASE let me know.
Thanks to all for being here for me, and for each other. This board gives hope and love, and its a wonderful thing.

[TinyTrudy]

Oh Kathy!!! I'm so so sooooooo sorry. I am actually speechless right now. I really had wished this was it for you. I mean you had such a good attitude and I couldn't want this for a better person. I'm sad, so very sad for you and your DH. honey...I hope your one of those people that has a hard time with HPT's so I can to the happy

[kathyMullins001]

Thanks Trudy, your support, and everyone's through this has been just great!!! I just wish someone would come place a baby in my arms right now and say "here, we don't want it, you can have it!!!"... ah, what a dream come true THAT would be!!!!

ANYWAYS... I can NOT do my Beta today. So I don't know if I should continue to do shots, suppositories and E2 suppliments through out the weekend or not... my gut tells me to forget it, its over... but my logical mind says "now, you shouldn't stop until you get a 100% positive definitive negative beta"... but its kind of perposterous... at 12dp3dt, clearly negative early detection HPTS... if I HPT again tomorrow morning and its STILL negative (of course)... would you do the shots??? Any opinions???
Thanks ladies!!!