Baby Party Stress

[Lilacs]

Hi Ladies,

In desperate need of advice. I'm going nuts. DH and I opted not to do a baby shower. We're not doing one for a couple of reasons. We live very far from all our family and friends...they're all out state. The only people here are DH's colleagues. So we felt that it's probably better to skip the whole baby shower. Plus, it's not likely that our friends and family travel the distance for the baby shower. So we did decided to do an arrival shower or a meet & sip kind of thing. That way, if anyone that does make the trip, at least gets to meet the baby too.

My sister is due in Jan and had her baby shower back in Nov. And she's been pushing me to also have a baby shower. She's actually very upset with me that I am not doing a baby shower.

A few of my friends who recently gave birth insists on the baby shower especially for the first born. They said registering for the baby really helped them out. The one thing they strongly insisted was that I should still put up a registry right now. That way, friends who want to get something for the baby when you announce the arrival of the baby, can go on the registry. And by the time the arrival shower comes along, the registry is still up for anyone who is attending or not attending, but want to give the baby something. If there's no registry, people will just randomly shop for your baby and I'll end up with a bunch of baby clothes that won't the baby or a bunch of baby blankets and such, which will not be useful. I wasn't going to register originally because I wasn't doing a baby shower. Plus, I'd have most of the essentials by the time the baby is here. So what would I even register for if I'm doing an arrival shower!?! But after hearing them say this, I'm torn. I don't want to be tacky.

This is all becoming all so stressful and overwhelming. I'm still learning the ropes of being pregnant! I've just begun to research strollers, cribs, mattresses, and car seats! There's just so much to prepare and learn. And now, the whole shower thing.

Any advice ladies? It would really help me out. Should I still put up a registry? I'm definitely having a party after the baby comes. If I put up a registry, what should I even register for?

Help!

-- Lilacs

[DMS721]

I would do a registry. Towards the end of your pregnancy you can get 10% off things left on your registry. People may shop ahead of time and send gifts. What about a baby shower via Skype? People buy off your registry and ship directly to you. They all meet at one place and they have cake, food, games, etc. You are there via Skype. You open the gifts while on Skype. It takes extra planning, but can be done.

My family is out of state, and we flew back home when he was 4 months old. We basically got lots of clothes and toys. My husband's family and my work had showers for me before the baby arrived. With my second, I didnt have any showers, not even a diaper one. I wanted to celebrate his birth, but it just didn't work out.


Dawn

[DMS721]

Wanted to add that you can register for things you won't need right away: highchair, exerciser, jumper, convertible car seats, baby gates, etc.

Dawn

[BC-Pennyh]

Just what you needed, one more thing to stress over! I like the idea of a "meet the baby" party. Even better, encourage one of your friends or family to plan the event at a location that's not your home, so that you won't need to worry about anything.

It doesn't hurt to register, and along with the things Dawn mentioned, I'd also say baby toys, diapers, baby videos (if you're planning on getting any), extra bottles if you need them, basically some of the small items you'll need. You can also start a registry online and gradually add items as you research what you like. If nothing else, you'll have a nice list to shop off of at some point, and like Dawn said, the extra discounts won't hurt.

Just focus on enjoying getting ready for the baby, and let packages arrive!

[SC-Sherb]

Hugs Lilacs. I agree, I would just do the registry because it also helps as a list for yourself of what you need. You can add everything that was mentioned and all the little things that you will need.

As for the baby shower, it's totally up to you but don't stress about it. My sister had one for me with DS#2 (there is 15 and 11 yrs difference between my older 2 and the little guy) and I didn't have any baby stuff at all. There was only about 6 people there but you know what, it was fun and I enjoyed it. There doesn't have to be a whole lot of people, just a little get-together to celebrate and then you could have the bigger party after your little girl is here.

Try not to stress too much about it. A registry will help with planning and that will relieve some of your stress.

[Ferret Mommy]

I am not planning to have a shower, but started throwing things on a registry, just for the discount! It is also helpful for someone that still wants to send a gift to you, as they do not need your address and it can be shipped from the store. Heck, my registry right now is more of a list of things I want to look at or am interested in before I forget what I was looking for! hahaha You can always update and change it, and you dont have to put clothing or blankets on it, unless you want too!

[Lilacs]

Thanks ladies! You're all so sweet.

I started making a list today. How much diapers do I need to put down for each of the sizes?

[Ferret Mommy]

Ummm... depends on the baby. DS was in newborn forever and never made it out of size 4 when he was almost 4!! My nephew was in size 4 before he hit 1 or right around 1 years old. Most places will let you exchange unopened if you have the receipt. We had the opposite problem of having too many bigger diapers, so we just bought the smaller till he grew into the bigger. Most people do not need newborn. Also, some people prefer huggies over pampers or luvs. We are a pampers family, but when the size 1 was too big in pampers, the huggies newborn were a little bigger. Its a great game to play.. what diaper fits the baby! hehehe

I had no diapers on my registery, but we had been given a lot as gifts. I would put a few down if you would like.

[SC-Sherb]

Yeah, I would just do a pack of newborn and a couple packs of size 1. My 2 boys were 8 lbs 1oz and 9 lbs 1oz, so, they both didn't last in the newborn diapers very long. Maybe a week or 2. My DD was 7lbs and she stayed in the newborn sizes for at least a month.

[Lilacs]

Thanks ladies!

I will not fight the extra discount!

I started to make a list on paper yesterday. Oh gosh. So much to look into. But I think once I tackle all my important and big purchases like my crib, mattress, stroller and car seat....I think the rest will appear less overwhelming. It's just on paper, it looks insane!