Crushed...

RuthieT · 04-13-2009, 07:27 PM

My DH and I have been ttc #2 for nearly 3 years. We did over a year of infertility treatments (clomid, metiformen, 4 IUI's) with no luck. We met with a specialist back in December and was told either injectables or IVF was our route... But I am wondering if that is really our only chances. The year we were on fertility meds they didnt try other meds just kept me on clomid for a year. For the past month or so I have started to feel that I would be ok with the fact that baby #2 wouldnt happen and if it did it would be a miracle and very welcomed. But, now I see and feel that my DH wants another. He is more into his little niece that is a baby and the little boy I watch he enjoys playing with. What if I really cant offer him the chance to be a father again to a newborn, what if he isnt truly happy with our family. I already feel like I am letting him and our DD down not being able to offer them another child and sibling. I feel so horrible. Everytime after we makelove I cry. I pray that we could get PG and that this time is the night it will happen. But, of course it doesnt. What I am to do. Should I insite of doing other treatments or is there truly no hope, but to put out thousands of dollars

dee32 · 04-14-2009, 06:40 AM

Well we haven't officially started for #2 yet but it's been 3 1/2 years since my dd was born and no surprises.

It didn't bother me when dd was an infant or the first year or so but now especially now as she gets older it really bothers me that she won't have a sibling and yet here I go stuffing my face getting fatter and fatter and not really doing anything to help improve my health in order to start treatments.

I know dh wants more children and I feel so bad that we may not have another. His family is fertile mrytle. All the women has to do is decide it's time for a baby and they are pregnant. Heck 2 of them conceived while on birth control.

RuthieT · 04-14-2009, 07:08 AM

I have been told that it could be possible that if I lost 20 to 40 pounds that I could get PG on my own. But, this road has been a long and rough road and I have found comfort in food and even though I havent gained anything I sure havent lost anything... I do want another baby more then anything, but some days it seems like the pain on not having another takes control over that.

dee32 · 04-14-2009, 07:13 AM

Can you possibly take a break for a month or so?

I have been obsessed for over a year now but so afraid to go back to my doctor and get on the meds. because I gained so much weight and yet the clock keeps ticking and I keep getting older by the minute.

But what I have decided was to take a month or two and not think about it at all. I am joining weight watchers this Sunday and work on myself and give myself a break from the obsession and the pain that IF causes.

Maybe that is an option for you also. Take a break for a month just to recoup, rest, and recharge for the **** IF battle.

RuthieT · 04-14-2009, 03:57 PM

well we have basically been taking a few months off, since I am no longer on Clomid. I still take OPK to find out when I Ovulate.

**BC-IrishBrat1313** · 04-18-2009, 12:11 PM

Ruthie...

I hope that your husband can love you no matter if you have 10 more children or no more children. The idea that love can be based on just having children shouldn't be a factor. So I hope your love can stand the pain of IF.

Have you thought about maybe doing some herbs?

04-13-2009, 07:27 PM	#1 (permalink)
RuthieT Registered User Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Oregon Posts: 8	Crushed... My DH and I have been ttc #2 for nearly 3 years. We did over a year of infertility treatments (clomid, metiformen, 4 IUI's) with no luck. We met with a specialist back in December and was told either injectables or IVF was our route... But I am wondering if that is really our only chances. The year we were on fertility meds they didnt try other meds just kept me on clomid for a year. For the past month or so I have started to feel that I would be ok with the fact that baby #2 wouldnt happen and if it did it would be a miracle and very welcomed. But, now I see and feel that my DH wants another. He is more into his little niece that is a baby and the little boy I watch he enjoys playing with. What if I really cant offer him the chance to be a father again to a newborn, what if he isnt truly happy with our family. I already feel like I am letting him and our DD down not being able to offer them another child and sibling. I feel so horrible. Everytime after we makelove I cry. I pray that we could get PG and that this time is the night it will happen. But, of course it doesnt. What I am to do. Should I insite of doing other treatments or is there truly no hope, but to put out thousands of dollars

04-14-2009, 06:40 AM	#2 (permalink)
dee32 1000-4999 post queen of hearts Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: nj Posts: 2,235	Child Mentioned Well we haven't officially started for #2 yet but it's been 3 1/2 years since my dd was born and no surprises. It didn't bother me when dd was an infant or the first year or so but now especially now as she gets older it really bothers me that she won't have a sibling and yet here I go stuffing my face getting fatter and fatter and not really doing anything to help improve my health in order to start treatments. I know dh wants more children and I feel so bad that we may not have another. His family is fertile mrytle. All the women has to do is decide it's time for a baby and they are pregnant. Heck 2 of them conceived while on birth control. __________________ Me 36 DH 40 One Beautiful Baby Girl Born 10/4/05!!!! Melanie Anna

04-14-2009, 07:13 AM	#4 (permalink)
dee32 1000-4999 post queen of hearts Join Date: Oct 2004 Location: nj Posts: 2,235	Can you possibly take a break for a month or so? I have been obsessed for over a year now but so afraid to go back to my doctor and get on the meds. because I gained so much weight and yet the clock keeps ticking and I keep getting older by the minute. But what I have decided was to take a month or two and not think about it at all. I am joining weight watchers this Sunday and work on myself and give myself a break from the obsession and the pain that IF causes. Maybe that is an option for you also. Take a break for a month just to recoup, rest, and recharge for the **** IF battle. __________________ Me 36 DH 40 One Beautiful Baby Girl Born 10/4/05!!!! Melanie Anna

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04-14-2009, 07:08 AM	#3 (permalink)
RuthieT Registered User Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Oregon Posts: 8	I have been told that it could be possible that if I lost 20 to 40 pounds that I could get PG on my own. But, this road has been a long and rough road and I have found comfort in food and even though I havent gained anything I sure havent lost anything... I do want another baby more then anything, but some days it seems like the pain on not having another takes control over that.

04-14-2009, 03:57 PM	#5 (permalink)
RuthieT Registered User Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: Oregon Posts: 8	well we have basically been taking a few months off, since I am no longer on Clomid. I still take OPK to find out when I Ovulate.

04-18-2009, 12:11 PM	#6 (permalink)
BC-IrishBrat1313 Just Trying To Help Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Lakeland, Georiga Posts: 3,665 Blog Entries: 471	Ruthie... I hope that your husband can love you no matter if you have 10 more children or no more children. The idea that love can be based on just having children shouldn't be a factor. So I hope your love can stand the pain of IF. Have you thought about maybe doing some herbs?