Just plain angry...

bholland001 · 11-08-2008, 12:57 PM

Long story short...I have PCOS, diagnosed at 17, have been trying for 3 years for a child..no success. OB/GYN referred to an RE in Mobile and on the first visit, I was told I needed to lose weight before any other meds were tried (have used Clomid, up to 200mg, with no luck)..this was on August 20th. Since then I have lost 49 lbs. and am now down to a BMI of 38% and am continuing to lose weight.

Of course I have been doing my vaginal ultrasounds on day 2 because my linig seems to be thick, along with my day 22 progesterone tests. This past Monday I went in for the progesterone test..of coursing thinking negatively because I had been doing OPK's at home with no success. Tuesday..on a whim..I tested before I went to work just to see if by some odd chance I was ovulating late...and guess what...TWO LINES SHOWED UP! The RE called, stated I had not ovulated, would have to use Agestin and start my cycle..blah blah blah. I mentioned what I had done and they want another progesterone test this coming Tuesday.

My anger lies in..when is enough lbs. dropped...how desperate am I going to have to get?? I want to be healthy for when I do get pregnant to ensure my child has every chance at thriving, but I am so tired of being told it's just because I'm overweight. On a per diem basis, I complete birth certificates for the state of Alabama on newborns, and last weekend I was so surprised when I walked in and the new mom weighed 324 lbs..with a starting weight of 307 and she revealed she has no problem getting pregnant. Am I crazy???? I hope I'm not the only person that feels this way.

**BC-IrishBrat1313** · 11-08-2008, 01:19 PM

You are not alone. I'm so tired of Dr's blaming everything on weight. It's really BS. I think it's their easy way out. I found some Dr's to be really fatphobic.

I was 297 when I got pregnant with my son. He was a really healthy baby. I had no problems. No high blood pressure. Nothing. The Dr I found didn't mention a single word about losing weight and I loved him for it. When certain medication didn't work...we moved on. He didn't blame my weight.

Enough weight lost in a hard question. In less you are the perfect weight in some Dr's eyes they won't see you. A friend of mine just saw someone in Jacksonville that told her to lose 40lbs and come back. What the heck? Is that the magic number? Annoying.

Is changing an doctors and option for you? I think women should mention that is discrimination when they use the weight issue.

annie79 · 11-10-2008, 08:05 PM

I know how frustrating this is bholland. My first RE spent most of our consultation focusing on my weight. He kept pulling copied articles out of his desk drawer that focused on obesity and pregnancy. He gave me a stack to read. At the end of the appt, he told me to lose 50 lbs and then come back and see him. Needless to say, I never went back to him. I switched doctors. My new RE never once mentioned my weight in the consultation. In fact, I brought it up and asked him if it was an issue and he told me it was not. He is currently studying the effects of obesity on pregnancy and he does not make any issue of my weight (284lbs). He has one of the highest success rates in my state and does not turn overweight women away. If you have the option, I would look for another RE who believes you deserve the best treatment possible for your fertility problems, overweight or not.

Mondayschild · 11-11-2008, 09:25 PM

Do you know what I had an RE tell me in North Carolina, weight was not an issue for just the success of IVF but for pregnancy and then he went on to discuss issues of obese children, adults, etc... It was easy to see he just had an issue with overweight people.

lddavis01 · 11-13-2008, 04:23 PM

Thank you God for this website. I have searched other to never hear anyone talking about this topic. I just posted a thread asking the same question. How can they legally do that? How can you deny fixing one problem because of another one? Long story shot went to an emergency doctor appt feeling uncomforted in the garden. This doctor talked about my weight the whole appt no test didn’t even open the gate to the garden to see if it was ok just talked about my weight. I ended up having to go back the following day with worse pains to have a doctor find a yeast infection this was after paying another $25 co-pay. So imagine what I am going through to get them to help me get pregnant. I have been in a fertile clinic for almost 2 or 3 years now. None will help me unless I lose 50lbs. I started at 260 now I am at 302 I am so depressed and unhappy it will continue to raise. All my family and friends have had kids and I am still waiting on Kaiser to stop being fatophobic.

**BC-IrishBrat1313** · 11-13-2008, 04:50 PM

I believe that you can be overweight and healthy. I think it's total bs that a doctor can refuse to treat a patient, because they are overweight.

I have delt with military doctors for awhile now...when I go in for a cold. They say it's because I'm fat. Do skinny people not get colds? Did I miss something? That causes some real anger with me.

When you find a doctor that's not fatphobic...stick with them. They are a failing breed. If they say, because you are overweight you will harm the baby...they are pulling stuff out their butts.

Can you tell this hits a button with me?

LMKH · 11-15-2008, 08:59 PM

Sometimes, weight affects fertility, sometimes, it does not. It depends on the person. I think sometimes, people use weight as the excuse because that is something that people can just blame the overweight person for and claim the overweight person just needs to "work harder."

My experience..I could not for the life of me get pregnant when at normal weight. It was not until I became overweight that I suddenly got pregnant spontaneously!! Later, when I started treatments again, I gained a bunch of weight on the treatments, but then, got pregnant when I discontinued the treatments and did not lose any weight.

Anytime you have a bad diet or lifestyle, it will affect fertility.If the bad lifestyle or diet causes you to be overweight, then yes, the weight can affect your fertility. But other people, who are made different, can have the same bad life style and not gain weight from it. An overweight person with a fine lifestyle and diet and exercise...the weight alone is not the issue. There are other causes.

**BC-IrishBrat1313** · 11-15-2008, 09:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LMKH

Sometimes, weight affects fertility, sometimes, it does not. It depends on the person. I think sometimes, people use weight as the excuse because that is something that people can just blame the overweight person for and claim the overweight person just needs to "work harder."

My experience..I could not for the life of me get pregnant when at normal weight. It was not until I became overweight that I suddenly got pregnant spontaneously!! Later, when I started treatments again, I gained a bunch of weight on the treatments, but then, got pregnant when I discontinued the treatments and did not lose any weight.

Anytime you have a bad diet or lifestyle, it will affect fertility.If the bad lifestyle or diet causes you to be overweight, then yes, the weight can affect your fertility. But other people, who are made different, can have the same bad life style and not gain weight from it. An overweight person with a fine lifestyle and diet and exercise...the weight alone is not the issue. There are other causes.

I couldn't agree more! Weight being used for an easy way out of the "I don't knows."

Each body is different. Each cycle is different. You can use the same medication the same days and get different response. Just one of the many fun things with infertility. (lots of sarcasim)

Each person...no matter what their weight is should get a fair chance. A fighting try. Not be turned away!

11-08-2008, 12:57 PM	#1 (permalink)
bholland001 Registered User Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: Midland City, Alabama Posts: 27	Just plain angry... Long story short...I have PCOS, diagnosed at 17, have been trying for 3 years for a child..no success. OB/GYN referred to an RE in Mobile and on the first visit, I was told I needed to lose weight before any other meds were tried (have used Clomid, up to 200mg, with no luck)..this was on August 20th. Since then I have lost 49 lbs. and am now down to a BMI of 38% and am continuing to lose weight. Of course I have been doing my vaginal ultrasounds on day 2 because my linig seems to be thick, along with my day 22 progesterone tests. This past Monday I went in for the progesterone test..of coursing thinking negatively because I had been doing OPK's at home with no success. Tuesday..on a whim..I tested before I went to work just to see if by some odd chance I was ovulating late...and guess what...TWO LINES SHOWED UP! The RE called, stated I had not ovulated, would have to use Agestin and start my cycle..blah blah blah. I mentioned what I had done and they want another progesterone test this coming Tuesday. My anger lies in..when is enough lbs. dropped...how desperate am I going to have to get?? I want to be healthy for when I do get pregnant to ensure my child has every chance at thriving, but I am so tired of being told it's just because I'm overweight. On a per diem basis, I complete birth certificates for the state of Alabama on newborns, and last weekend I was so surprised when I walked in and the new mom weighed 324 lbs..with a starting weight of 307 and she revealed she has no problem getting pregnant. Am I crazy???? I hope I'm not the only person that feels this way.

11-08-2008, 01:19 PM	#2 (permalink)
BC-IrishBrat1313 Just Trying To Help Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Lakeland, Georiga Posts: 3,665 Blog Entries: 471	pg and child ment You are not alone. I'm so tired of Dr's blaming everything on weight. It's really BS. I think it's their easy way out. I found some Dr's to be really fatphobic. I was 297 when I got pregnant with my son. He was a really healthy baby. I had no problems. No high blood pressure. Nothing. The Dr I found didn't mention a single word about losing weight and I loved him for it. When certain medication didn't work...we moved on. He didn't blame my weight. Enough weight lost in a hard question. In less you are the perfect weight in some Dr's eyes they won't see you. A friend of mine just saw someone in Jacksonville that told her to lose 40lbs and come back. What the heck? Is that the magic number? Annoying. Is changing an doctors and option for you? I think women should mention that is discrimination when they use the weight issue.

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11-10-2008, 08:05 PM	#3 (permalink)
annie79 Registered User Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Michigan Posts: 8	I know how frustrating this is bholland. My first RE spent most of our consultation focusing on my weight. He kept pulling copied articles out of his desk drawer that focused on obesity and pregnancy. He gave me a stack to read. At the end of the appt, he told me to lose 50 lbs and then come back and see him. Needless to say, I never went back to him. I switched doctors. My new RE never once mentioned my weight in the consultation. In fact, I brought it up and asked him if it was an issue and he told me it was not. He is currently studying the effects of obesity on pregnancy and he does not make any issue of my weight (284lbs). He has one of the highest success rates in my state and does not turn overweight women away. If you have the option, I would look for another RE who believes you deserve the best treatment possible for your fertility problems, overweight or not.

11-11-2008, 09:25 PM	#4 (permalink)
Mondayschild 700-799 post 9 of hearts Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: US Posts: 790	Do you know what I had an RE tell me in North Carolina, weight was not an issue for just the success of IVF but for pregnancy and then he went on to discuss issues of obese children, adults, etc... It was easy to see he just had an issue with overweight people.

11-13-2008, 04:23 PM	#5 (permalink)
lddavis01 Registered User Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: vallejo, california Posts: 6	Thank you God for this website. I have searched other to never hear anyone talking about this topic. I just posted a thread asking the same question. How can they legally do that? How can you deny fixing one problem because of another one? Long story shot went to an emergency doctor appt feeling uncomforted in the garden. This doctor talked about my weight the whole appt no test didn’t even open the gate to the garden to see if it was ok just talked about my weight. I ended up having to go back the following day with worse pains to have a doctor find a yeast infection this was after paying another $25 co-pay. So imagine what I am going through to get them to help me get pregnant. I have been in a fertile clinic for almost 2 or 3 years now. None will help me unless I lose 50lbs. I started at 260 now I am at 302 I am so depressed and unhappy it will continue to raise. All my family and friends have had kids and I am still waiting on Kaiser to stop being fatophobic.

11-13-2008, 04:50 PM	#6 (permalink)
BC-IrishBrat1313 Just Trying To Help Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Lakeland, Georiga Posts: 3,665 Blog Entries: 471	I believe that you can be overweight and healthy. I think it's total bs that a doctor can refuse to treat a patient, because they are overweight. I have delt with military doctors for awhile now...when I go in for a cold. They say it's because I'm fat. Do skinny people not get colds? Did I miss something? That causes some real anger with me. When you find a doctor that's not fatphobic...stick with them. They are a failing breed. If they say, because you are overweight you will harm the baby...they are pulling stuff out their butts. Can you tell this hits a button with me?

11-15-2008, 08:59 PM	#7 (permalink)
LMKH 200-299 post 4 of hearts Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Flower Mound, TX Posts: 260	Sometimes, weight affects fertility, sometimes, it does not. It depends on the person. I think sometimes, people use weight as the excuse because that is something that people can just blame the overweight person for and claim the overweight person just needs to "work harder." My experience..I could not for the life of me get pregnant when at normal weight. It was not until I became overweight that I suddenly got pregnant spontaneously!! Later, when I started treatments again, I gained a bunch of weight on the treatments, but then, got pregnant when I discontinued the treatments and did not lose any weight. Anytime you have a bad diet or lifestyle, it will affect fertility.If the bad lifestyle or diet causes you to be overweight, then yes, the weight can affect your fertility. But other people, who are made different, can have the same bad life style and not gain weight from it. An overweight person with a fine lifestyle and diet and exercise...the weight alone is not the issue. There are other causes.