Crazy?

raven0855 · 09-05-2009, 06:44 PM

Would it be crazy to hold a "benefit" or jack and jill type event to earn money for IVF? We would have food/beer/soda all you can eat for a general cost. cash bar for other drinks and get cool things to raffle off. DJ for music. I feel like it would be weird to do it for ourselves but couples do it for their weddings so why not? What are your thoughts??

nancydrew · 09-06-2009, 11:56 AM

I'm not sure what "Emily Post" types would think of this, but I think it's a great idea.

There are a lot of people I know who would make such great parents, and it would be an honor to help them build their family.

However. I would be unwilling to attend this type of event if:
1. The couple seems to me to already have a lot of money
2. The couple seems to waste their money on lots of extravagant things
3. I don't feel reassured that the money will go toward the purpose for which it is intended

It would be great if this event could be hosted by someone else, perhaps a sibling, or parent, or good friend. That would remove some of the awkwardness of asking for money. Also, maybe even set up a separate account for this money, with a few outside "trustees". That way, no one can accuse you of using it for other purposes, and the givers are reassured that all unused funds will go to charity.

raven0855 · 09-06-2009, 02:00 PM

Thanks you have some very valid points. We are a couple in our late 20s who are comfortable with the amount of money we have but in no way have the money to afford IVF. I would def want my fam to sponsor it as it is an akward feeling to be asking for financial help. I think it would be great for everyone to know they helped us make our little one. I would never even think of using the money for something else but can see the concern so the trustee idea is great! Thank u for your thoughts!!!

nancydrew · 09-06-2009, 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by raven0855

Thanks you have some very valid points. We are a couple in our late 20s who are comfortable with the amount of money we have but in no way have the money to afford IVF. I would def want my fam to sponsor it as it is an akward feeling to be asking for financial help. I think it would be great for everyone to know they helped us make our little one. I would never even think of using the money for something else but can see the concern so the trustee idea is great! Thank u for your thoughts!!!

I'm glad you didn't take it the wrong way! I was worried it sounded judgmental. I just want to be sure that my hard-earned dollars go to a worthy cause. Maybe I should have just said that!

We are also late 20's, thinking about IVF possibly 2011. We feel strongly that it is not something we want to get into debt over. I am starting to think about creative ways we can pay for it all; wondering if I should start a charity for myself!!! (Can you do a non-profit for these funds? How are they taxed?) I am also looking at the grants out there and planning to apply when the time is right.

It is so disheartening that we have to pay so much, when almost everyone else gets to conceive for free.

eli · 09-06-2009, 06:27 PM

It's an interesting and creative idea. There will always be nay sayers, but hey, desperate times call for desperate measures. I think it could be pulled off, esp if you have your family's support. Many of us have done sooooo many interesting things to come up with the dough to finance our IVFs. Soooo, why not?

waitinginpa · 09-06-2009, 11:29 PM

I have heard of people selling lottery type tickets, like strip tickets to go on family vacations so I say why not. Sounds like a good idea to me. I would totally go to something like that.

jennifer09 · 10-17-2009, 09:36 PM

I've actually thought about it myself but have no idea where to begin! Don't live by any family so we'd have to throw something for Soldiers at our house. Just maybe.......I'd prob be shy and so would dh. He'll prob think I'm crazy. Which I am but anyway...lol.

Would you have to get a permit? Funny because I was watching The Nanny reruns(if you've watched that before) and Fran threw a party and charge etc...and got arrested LOL.

09-05-2009, 06:44 PM	#1 (permalink)
raven0855 0-99 post 2 of hearts Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 40	Crazy? Would it be crazy to hold a "benefit" or jack and jill type event to earn money for IVF? We would have food/beer/soda all you can eat for a general cost. cash bar for other drinks and get cool things to raffle off. DJ for music. I feel like it would be weird to do it for ourselves but couples do it for their weddings so why not? What are your thoughts?? __________________ 6/09- IUI #1 (50mg clomid)---BFN 7/09- IUI #2 (7mg Femera)---BFN 8/09- IUI #3(7mg Femera)--- BFN 10/09-Mini- IVF #1-BFN

09-06-2009, 02:00 PM	#3 (permalink)
raven0855 0-99 post 2 of hearts Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 40	Thanks you have some very valid points. We are a couple in our late 20s who are comfortable with the amount of money we have but in no way have the money to afford IVF. I would def want my fam to sponsor it as it is an akward feeling to be asking for financial help. I think it would be great for everyone to know they helped us make our little one. I would never even think of using the money for something else but can see the concern so the trustee idea is great! Thank u for your thoughts!!! __________________ 6/09- IUI #1 (50mg clomid)---BFN 7/09- IUI #2 (7mg Femera)---BFN 8/09- IUI #3(7mg Femera)--- BFN 10/09-Mini- IVF #1-BFN

09-06-2009, 11:29 PM	#6 (permalink)
waitinginpa 0-99 post 2 of hearts Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Pittsburgh Posts: 51	I have heard of people selling lottery type tickets, like strip tickets to go on family vacations so I say why not. Sounds like a good idea to me. I would totally go to something like that. __________________ Heidi IVF #1 BFP DD now 4 IVF #2 BFN IVF #3 Cx IVF #4 BFP M/C @ 8 wks IVF#5 BFN IVF #6 BFP M/C @ 8 wks IVF #7 BFP--Chemical pregnancy with perfect PGD's Blasts IVF #8-- CGH results in after 7 long weeks--2 normal embies.....3/16 transfer

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09-06-2009, 11:56 AM	#2 (permalink)
nancydrew 0-99 post 2 of hearts Join Date: Sep 2009 Posts: 17	I'm not sure what "Emily Post" types would think of this, but I think it's a great idea. There are a lot of people I know who would make such great parents, and it would be an honor to help them build their family. However. I would be unwilling to attend this type of event if: 1. The couple seems to me to already have a lot of money 2. The couple seems to waste their money on lots of extravagant things 3. I don't feel reassured that the money will go toward the purpose for which it is intended It would be great if this event could be hosted by someone else, perhaps a sibling, or parent, or good friend. That would remove some of the awkwardness of asking for money. Also, maybe even set up a separate account for this money, with a few outside "trustees". That way, no one can accuse you of using it for other purposes, and the givers are reassured that all unused funds will go to charity.

09-06-2009, 06:27 PM	#5 (permalink)
eli 10000-15000 post ace of hearts Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: NY Posts: 26,023 Blog Entries: 278	It's an interesting and creative idea. There will always be nay sayers, but hey, desperate times call for desperate measures. I think it could be pulled off, esp if you have your family's support. Many of us have done sooooo many interesting things to come up with the dough to finance our IVFs. Soooo, why not?

10-17-2009, 09:36 PM	#7 (permalink)
jennifer09 0-99 post 2 of hearts Join Date: Sep 2009 Location: ga Posts: 65	I've actually thought about it myself but have no idea where to begin! Don't live by any family so we'd have to throw something for Soldiers at our house. Just maybe.......I'd prob be shy and so would dh. He'll prob think I'm crazy. Which I am but anyway...lol. Would you have to get a permit? Funny because I was watching The Nanny reruns(if you've watched that before) and Fran threw a party and charge etc...and got arrested LOL.