So frustrated - at myself!

[Ona's mum]

I'm so frustrated with our last cycle. We went to a new clinic after 4 fresh and 2 frozen at our old clinic - we were really excited to get a new opinion and hopefully some fresh thinking.

We gave our whole file to the new doc and he came up with a protocol.

It went wrong - disasterously - we got 1 mature egg and needless to say didn't make it to transfer.

So I sat and went through our file (this is where i'm frustrated with myself) and our very first cycle used his "new" protocol (where we got 4 eggs and immediately changed to antagonist cycle afterwards with more success).

Should i have actually expected him to read our file, or should i have understood it better before hand???? I'm not very medical and to be honest it is a complicated read but with a bit more incentive now i can work it out.

Sorry i needed to rant. We went to this clinic as they are slightly cheaper (different country) and thought we could lesson the impact a little - but now we are paying more!!!

[barren-bipolar]

I'm so sorry. What a disappointment. Try not to blame yourself for this. All this medical stuff is very complicated, and we expect doctors to do their jobs! I understand much of the medical jargon only because I had some medical training myself before I decided to change fields in college. If I hadn't studied medical terminology, I would have been completely in the dark!

Yes, you absolutely should have expected him to read your file. That's the first step medical professionals are supposed to take when they get a new case. It sounds like you did your homework with the financial end of things and that's also a lot of time invested. This is not your fault.

Often different countries have different names for the same medications. Most medical professionals only know the names that are most commonly used in their own country. It's quite possible that even if you had studied your file for hours, you would not have known that he was giving you the same medication you were on originally. Cut yourself some slack. You are going through a lot! Having a failed cycle is tough enough as it is.

I guess it's normal to blame ourselves. I know I've done that (probably every time a cycle failed). Other girls always told me not to blame myself, and it's so hard to stop. I "get" that. But I'm going to tell you to stop it anyway! Try to do something nice for yourself today. You wouldn't treat a friend like you're treating yourself.

[Deswife03]

I am so sorry that must be so frustrating! But this is NOT YOUR FAULT!! Your doctor definatley should have read your file. I would be so mad and would demand a refund. Please be easy on your self but do not let your dcotor get away with this. I think what he did was tottaly unprofessional. You did everything right in reasearching your new doctor.

[pemmie]

warning: PG mentioned in signature

unfortunately, so many of these places are like factories and the reality is you often don't get the attention you deserve/need. i have often experience that the doc has not read my file so even if i come off as annoying, i walk him through it because at the end of the day, i want things done right. it's not your fault at all, just a lesson learned. i think in this day and age, all patients need to fend for themselves and speak up constantly. it sad, but true that the squeaky wheel gets the oil. good luck with whatever your next steps may be.