Wasted days and wasted nights

[Abilene]

I am new to this site, but we have been trying to conceive since April of this yr and since I am 40 that puts me in the problem category.

I was a good girl- went to the dr and told him I wanted to try. He said great go off the pill for two months use condoms and then start trying. Fine I thought. Three months of spotting later still no luck. Back to the Dr.nowtwo months on double the last stregnth bc's. The spotting never stopped. However I called and asked what I should do. I was told start Clomid and come in for testing as suggested. I did it all. One month of Clomid @ 100 mg for 5 days. No luck- spotting again. JOY! So I call and tell the doctors nurse I am sick of this stopping and starting every couple of months to take BC's. Spotting is no longer acceptable! The dr. left me a message last Friday saying I need either stronger BC's again (I think not as it is the 5th time in 4 yrs), go with another month of the Clomid -"the spotting will stop" or have a D&C. He said call if I had questions. I did and I haven't heard from him yet. I left 4 messages to call me. I decided not to attempt another Clomid cycle @ 150mg as he suggested until we deal with the spotting. I am angry, disappointed and would like to neuter him with my bare hands. I feel like an old cow who the farmer puts out in the north forty and feeds and cares for less since I probably won't get pregnant ever.
I don't mind the D&C. I just feel like I have wasted 9 months doing nothing!

I did get another appointment with another doctor- a specialist, but I am so disappointed with my OB/GYN. I wish I could figure out a way to vent this stuff to him and make him hurt like I do right now.

Am I the only one who has doctor issues? I hate wasting time. I am emotionally drained and we decided to only give this a yr. from last personal Dr visit. That yr will be over in Sept. I don't think any amount of time will ever make me a mother.
Abilene

[SammysMom]

I'm sorry about your lack of effective infertility care. I went through 2 OB/GYNS within 2 months, trying to find one that would be aggressive in getting me pregnant after a m/c when I was 38. I then figured out what I needed was an RE. Unfortunately, my first RE was a dimwit when it came to an older gal, so now I'm in the 2ww with my 2nd IVF and another RE who is a lot better, and I'm 40 with no babies like you. It just sucks. But my advice is to run like a mad woman to a good RE!!!

[BC-NanceLee]

Thanks for making me think of Freddy Fender - I was singing that **** song walking to my car!

I hope you find the trick - right doc, right med, right timing - and 2005 is a much better year for you.

[agnes2712]

Sounds to me like it is time for you to move on to an RE. An OB can only do so much and you certainly dont want to keep spinning your wheels. You will feel better and have more options available to get pregnant. Good luck!!

Tammy

[jcc]

I also found that I wasted too much time with my OB and needed to seek an RE. Of course then reading all the IF materials I see that is one of the most common complains.....see RE right away. Hope a new doc is just what you need. Good luck !

[Mamma2twins]

Word of advice, D & C's can be dangerous to your lining affecting your success at a pregnancy.

Due to your age and time restrictions, an RE is best option.

(P.S. My OB/GYN scheduled me for a D&C and my RE talked me out of it. After more testing, I never needed the D&C. Many D&C's are very necessary though. Speak to an RE if you can.)

Best wishes,
Rea

[Abilene]

Well, another cycle and no luck later I am back. Update. I have a new fertility specialist and I am going to have an HSG on Wednesday (if it doesn't snow). I stopped the Clomid after one cycle got a new dr who seems to care. He gave me lots of alternatives, but agreed I don't have lots of time to play with. I don't want a d&C and he suggested the HSG as a start. He also tested for STD's and I have a mammogran today. He will meet with us after the results of the HSG and we will decide what direction to go then. I don't want to waste lots of time if my tubes are blocked or come other little thing is wrong that was never looked at in the beginning. Wish me luck! I guess two 500 mg aleve should help the pain during the HSG?
Abilene

[jcc]

Good luck Abilene. It is good to hear you're with a new specialist who seems to be better. An HSG is definitely something you should do if you haven't already. If Aleve is your pain med of choice, that should be fine....my RE recommended ibuprofin but whatever pain med you take for cramps (if you're unlucky enough to have them pretty bad like me), then that should work. I would make sure to take two BEFORE the test. You'll want this pain med in your system before the test and that should help lessen the cramping afterward. It seems that the women here have varying experiences with the HSG. Mine was painful (cramping feeling) for just about a minute when the dye went in....then after that I was fine with just a dull ache, and tender pelvic area for the rest of the day. I just took it pretty easy and was fine later in the evening and the next day. Good luck !!

[Abilene]

Well, I survived my HSG yesterday and my tubes were clear on both sides! I even had pain meds in advance and it still hurt all night long. Thank the good lord above it only took 8 minutes! Finally some good news. I see the doctor on Monday to discuss going back on Clomid next cycle. After that I see the accupuncturist for stress. Maybe this weekend we can have some BMS that might work. Fingers crossed.
Abilene

[jcc]

Get to that BMS. My doctors (and I've heard a few others say) that just by having an HSG, you could actually increase your chances a bit. The process of putting the dye through your tubes forces them to open up a little more so I've heard of some surprise successes after the procedure. Good luck!