Roll Call/Introduction: Lurkers too!

[SueZ]

Hi. I lurk here sometimes, even though I'm not ttc just yet, but hopefully soon. I used ds because we lost our first son due to a genetic kidney disease my husband and I found out we carried, so we went the donor route in order for it not to happen again, 25% chance it would! So after going through he*ll and back, losing my son, having one missed miscarriage afterwards, I have been blessed with a son from ds, who is almost 3. And might i add, the kid is gorgeous! I'm hoping to use the same donor, he is only being used for parents who already have a child with his sperm. So i'm glad we can use the same donor, as I want a full sibling for my child, but if I couldn't, then that would be ok too I guess.

Anyway, it feels so good to read this board. No one really knows we did ds and it's nice to have some support and feel so not alone in this.

Suzanne
^!^ Zachary, 5/3/98-5/4/98
one m/c
Nicholas Zachary, almost 3

[cro]

Alright, I'll officially introduce myself. I've been over on the iui bb for the last 1 1/2 years, but now I bop in over here every now and then. Way back when it all started, we learned that dh had high SA counts and motility, but very low morphology (3%). I think it was somewhere around iui#3 that dh started mentioning diui. He just wants to have a baby! But I was very reluctant and insisted that we make sure there's absolutely nothing wrong w/me first. I had lots of blood tests (normal), a laparoscopy (normal), and tried switching to injectibles. Nothing helped. When we finally found out that dh has antisperm antibodies, RE's office added chymotrypsin to the sperm wash. That seemed to improve the sperm quality, but after 2 tries w/that, still not pg.

So...
here we are on the donor bb. Nov 23 was my first diui. It didn't feel as weird as I thought it would (having another man's sperm in me). Now I'm just hoping and praying that this one works. I'm really getting tired of all this IF cr@p. I'm too young for this!

[Monchhichi]

I am mommy to a beautiful little girl, conceived through DIUI (as dh has azoospermia). She is the light of our lives!

cycle 1 - DIUI, unmedicated, failed
cycle 2 - didn't ovulate, diagnosed with PCOS
cycle 3 - Clomid, HCG trigger, progesterone, ended in ectopic pg
cycle 4 - Clomid, Metformin, baby aspirin, HCG trigger, progesterone.... conceived my baby girl

UPDATE! We have a second little princess through DIUI (Clomid, baby aspirin, HCG trigger and progesterone - same donor). She was conceived on our first tx cycle this time!

[Cheryllynn]

I've been trying to read everyone's postings, but never have time to post myself, so this time I'm going right to posting.

DH and I were married 10/8/99. 2nd marriage for both of us. DH has 2 dd's from 1st marriage now ages 17 & 20. In 1991 he had a vasectomy and 2/22/00 it was reversed. I never thought this procedure would not work and since he had 2 dd's already thought mf was not in our future, but it was. Subsequent testing indicated dh's s/a showed low count, low motility, low morphology, 100% anti-sperm antibodies and 55% dna fragmentation on the SCSA test.

I am now 43 and still ttc my #1. We've done IUI's - all negative, first IVF in MN was neg, but I seriously wonder about the awful transfer. Embies were carried in, then catheter was unsuccesfully placed, they were carried back out, then back in again when correct catheter was used . UGH. neg cycle. Changed to NYU. 2nd IVF, crappie embies. 3rd IVF, 5 beautiful 8 - 10 celled grade A embies. All 5 transferred, pg with twins, but twin A never had a h/b, twin B h/b stopped 2 days before Mother's day 2002 at 7 wks. 4th IVF also at NYU, transferred 4 morulas on day 5 but also negative. My tests are always 'same as a 20 yr old' with fsh = 2.4, e2 = 25. I stim fast (only 5-6 days) and well, with 10 - 15 eggs at r/t or with 6-8 follies for IUI's with only 2 amps. Then always the same, MF, sperms don't look very good.

So I've debated whether to use Donor sperm or donor embryo. Donor sperm has caused several heated discussions.

I'm supposed to be pg with my second by now, instead, after $50,000 in medical bills, over 100 injections later, with more tears than I could imagine, I'm still here ttc.

I have two over 40 friends plus SIL just deliver their 2nd child in the past 5 months.

I usually hang out on the over 35 bb but have lurked here since November.

Cheryllynn 43, dh 42

[Kalyn]

Hi

You all have such amazing stories.. it makes me feel so much more hopeful about my own chances, seeing what you have all gone through and that there are people out there in the same situation as me! I’m very new to this site (registered yesterday) so please bear with me if I make any terrible faux pas regarding the technical aspects of posting, etc; this is the first time I’ve used a bulletin board.

I was diagnosed with POF at age 19. A LAP revealed that my ovaries had failed to develop correctly (reason unknown). Thereafter followed years of HRT. My response during those years was to just not think about being infertile and what that meant, and I put all thoughts & feelings about having children into a mental box (infertility ... do not open!) It was only when I met my husband and we started talking about getting married that the issue of children came up again. I'd initially told him about my condition, which (wonderful man that he is!) didn't make any difference to the way he felt about me. We also realised that with all the amazing developments in ART there might be a chance for me to conceive with donor eggs and IVF.

We started seriously visiting fertility specialists just before we got married (three years ago) and after ultrasound scans & a hysteroscopy discovered that my uterus was in great shape and that I was a perfect candidate for IVF with donor eggs! The problem was with finding a donor. Fertility treatment here is fairly advanced, but it’s not really an ‘industry’ like it is in the States or Europe, and it’s not something that most people talk about. Consequently there are much fewer clinics and a smaller pool of donors ... especially if you’re not in a big city.

The first Dr we visited said we needed to find our own donor. I was 34 and most of my female friends are also in that age group, and most of them hadn’t had children of their own. Hardly ideal candidates for egg donation. My sister would’ve been great, but she’s 8 years older than me. We decided that an anonymous donor would be best, but didn’t know how or where to find one.

Then we discovered that friends of ours were having IVF at another clinic in our area (they are now 7 months PG!) and that this clinic had an egg donation programme. Yippee! But things seldom run that smoothly. It took a while to find a donor -- most patients at the clinic were of a different population group, so that made it even harder finding a match. Eventually a lovely person (a nurse) came forward and agreed to altruistically donate her eggs (paying donors is illegal here). She already had three beautiful, healthy children of her own so seemed like a good candidate, and we were set to go in January, but her ovaries didn't respond to the stimulation treatment, and by February it became clear that it wasn’t going to work out. Our fertility specialist had no other suitable egg donors.

We are now seeing a specialist at a fertility clinic in another city. The clinic is much larger than anything we have here, and they have a much larger pool of donors as well. I've been told the average waiting time for matching me with a donor is three months. So that's where we are at the moment ... waiting and hoping.

I wish all of you wonderful people the best of luck ... after reading your stories I realise that any child would be blessed to choose you as parents.

Kalyn

[skitcher]

Lisa,

I just wanted to let you know about a clinic in Southern California that we used for our donor embryos. After 10 years of trying (adopted a little girl 3 years ago), we are pregnant! I am now 10 weeks along. We found a clinic in Newport Beach, CA which has no waiting list and was sooo wonderful to work with! The name of the clinic is Southern California Center for Reproductive Medicine...something along those lines, sorry. If you look at their website, www.socalfertility.com it will show you more. All the staff were wonderful and the clinic was very professional. I called them in October, had my first appointment in November, started my drugs in January to prepare my body, and did my transfer in February. And we live in Kansas City, Missouri! It isn't easy to have to fly somewhere to do all this, but for the most part, we work with my local dr and consult with the CA staff when needed. I would say our estimated total cost would be around $3000 ($450 for dr; $900 for lab) with travel, drugs, and procedure. For you, it wouldn't be quite as high because you can drive there! We didn't have to wait on a list or a match...we actually picked out our donor embryos based on the information provided by the donors (physical features and health history).

If you want any more information about the clinic, or anyone else for that matter, please feel free to email me at kitchs@juno.com. I love sharing our experience!

Samantha

[Lucy-1]

My re-intro:

It has been a long time since I was on this board, but flexney (aka Dana) reminded me about this board) and I just had to rush back over. It is so funny how a little down time in between treatments, you can forget what boards you visit! LOL

Anyway, about me... I am a gestational surrogate. (Odd, I know) I have 3 daughters (2 bio and 1 step) who I adore and could not imaginelife without, hence... surrogacy. I wanted to help couples share the same wonderful things I did with my children. I delivered a boy for a Russian couple almost 5 years ago and boy/girl twins for a Florida couple almost 3 years ago. The twins resulted from a ED cycle. I am currently working with a couple from New York and they are also using an ED. So, I know some aspects of ED issues, but obviously do not know them all as I am not a parent of ED, although truth be told, I consider my step-daughter (who has lived with me and her father since she was 5 who is now 17), to be my daughter via DE. I also am adopted, so I understand from that point of view as a child who does not have a biological connection to my parents and my oldest bio-daughter was adopted by my DH who has been in her life since the day she was born and truly the only father she has ever known, He considers her his daughter via DS. Anyway, you can read my signature as it has my IVF history on it. There is a lot! LOL

Hugs to all,
Lucy

[lleva99]

Hi my name is Sarah and I'm 22 years old. I was diagnosed with POF in July of 2003, the day after my husband and I celebrated our second anniversary. My dh is 27 and has no fertility issues. My POF is a result of Leukemia at age 8 with 2 1/2 years of chemo. Then at age 13 I relapsed and had more chemo, radiation, and a bonemarrow transplant. My sister was 2 years old at the time and she was my donor, a PERFECT match! God is so good, and amazing! Anyway, so I am doing wonderful no reprecussions, wonderful health, etc. Except, of course, the IF issues. We just went through a failed adoption the week of Christmas so we're still recovering from that. But we are interested in adoption, and embryo adoption/donation. I would like to experience pregnancy and birth and be able to bond with my child earlier. We have thought about donor eggs but my dh isn't real comfortable with that; he doesn't know how he would feel about knowing that it was his and someone else's child, biologically speaking. We have thought about a related donor, such as my sister who is my twin only 10 years younger. We're not too comfortable with that either, my sister is only 11 right now and I think that it would make her uncomfortable to know that our child was biologically hers and my husbands. Anyway, at 11 anything to do with eggs and sperm and his and hers is just too wierd to deal with. So, that's the long version. Anything else? Oh, I guess I could tell you all that I'm an RN and I work in Obstetrics which is usually totally glorious except for times when I'm a bit depressed about my own inability to conceive. And when all of my co-workers are getting pregnant. Not joking, last year over a dozen of the staff on the OB unit were pregnant. Everyone is delivered now and there are four more pregnant and counting. It's so depressing sometimes. My dh works in banking and is a musician at our church. He has been the worship leader for the past year and a half. So, our plan now is to network and get our names out there about adoption and embryo adoption/donation and on January 10 we start our foster/adopt training, so we are well on our way and praying for positive results! Well, you are all just awesome and I am so glad that my frind Dawn turned me on to FT. Sorry that this was so long!

Lleva99
mom to Spencer and Savanna-yorkshire terriers
failed adoption 12/2003

[skitcher]

Dear lleva99,

I would love to talk to you about some options available out there. I have done MUCH research and have done many of the things you are talking about in your most recent posting. My dh and I went through the Department of Family Services classes to foster/adopt and then the Lord surprised us with a baby girl from a private adoption! Amazing! Then, this past October, I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl from donor embryos! I am STILL in shock that it all worked...I carried a baby...someone else's, but still, my body worked! We tried everything! I too did not respond to the meds, only 3 follicles each time. So, we opted to do this, the donor embryos and could not be happier!!! I am looking for more and might be able to shed some light on finding some clinics for you, if you are interested.

You can email me at kitchs@sbcglobal.net (as well as anyone else interested!).

Samantha

[babywanter]

Hi everyone! My name is Wendy (38) and my hubby is Tom (39). We have been together 17 years and are still happily married. My husband has an autoimmune disease that started attacking his liver in his 20's. He had a liver transplant in 1996 thanks to a wonderful family making the decision to donate. We started ttc in 1998 with no luck. I had a HSG in 1999 and became preg and m/c at 10 1/2 wks. I went to a fertility specialist after that and they ran several tests and we ended up concieving my ds late 2000 using a baking soda douche to reduce acid.

I started ttc #2 in 2002 and have now had 2 more m/c. My husband was diagnosed with cancer last fall and is in remission but we did a quick freeze and have not been able to concieve since. They did some testing for why I was m/c and found nothing. I had been convinced it was my husbands sperm being altered from all the years of anti-rejection meds (and X-rays ...). We knew his counts were low but were told not THAT low. We did 1 IUI with donor sperm with no luck. We do have some of his left frozen also.

I just decided to move on to IVF and started trying to decide where to go. While talking to some shared risk programs, as we have no coverage for IVF, they told me to check my day 3 hormone levels only to find out my FSH is 12.2. I can't believe it was never checked!! I am now trying to decide between DE or trying a cylce with my eggs and whether or not to use his sperm.

We are back to battling his original disease now that the cancer is gone. I hope I make the right decisions for my family. My DH would do anything I want and truly be happy with it. He is an amazingly strong and wonderful person.

Thank you all for creating this wonderful "web" of support. These stories are incredible and I hope we can all look back 17 years from now while the kids are telling us we don't love them because we set a curfew and smile at how hard we worked to have that child!