Need help - how to start

[again???]

I had stopped TTC when it was confirmed that I was in menopause at the age of 37 - now 39.5, I have decided I want to try DE. I don't know where to start or how to make sure I keep the ball rolling. DH has agreed but I know he will question once things get started and I know that I am a pushover when he does that. It is so easy to second guess the decision, the timing, the money, etc. What do I do first? How do I keep the momentum going? Any help now or nagging once I get started will be appreciated.

Katie

[rjc0704]

Hi Katie - I can say having been there and many others too, that the journey to make that leap to de varies person to person. I can say though, that everyone feels a new found hope in de after so much loss and disappointment--and it's very welcoming to have that hope again! If you and dh are fairly confident this is what you want, you can start off by picking a clinic/RE if you haven't already, and speak to a couselor there. They will usually have you do that anyway, just help coach you through (not to analyze you) and everyone finds it very helpful.

As far as keeping the ball rolling, that's a tough one! DE is very expensive and no guarentees! Though many are successful the 1st time, for some it takes several cycles. So you have to consider your resources and the financial impact--and that's on top of they physical and emotional tolls. There are some clinics that offer shared risk and 100% money back for multiple cycle attempts. We are with Shady Grove in MD in the shared risk. Recipients (as many as 3) can share 1 donor's eggs which drastically cuts costs. So there are many options out there to research before you decide what is best for you.

So keep talking it over with dh and think of all the scenarios you can and try to make decisions and plans together. Best this way so you are both on the same page because as you know, IF is a difficult road! Feel free to join us on the DE All Welcome thread for lots of support, answers, and more! Best wishes!