Failed DE Cycle?

[rjc0704]

For those interested in virtual hug, support, listening ears, or advise...there is a support group for us rare people who have had failed DE cycles.


http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group...guid=395120190

[Mom_2_One]

I just wanted to say that I'm very sorry to hearing about your failed cycle. I hope that you have gotten some good support from the yahoo group...I hope that you have major success with the four frozen embryos that are waiting for you. I know how recurrent loss feels. I would not wish this sad situation on anyone...You are a strong person to keep going and i'll pray for your success.
-Victoria

[rjc0704]

Victoria - I love your name....it will be perfect for our dd should we ever have one! Congrats on your BFP! And thanks for your kindness.

I did post on the other board, but no one has joined me. I suppose that's a good thing as I wouldn't wish failed donor cycles on anyone! I noticed someone else started a thread in 2005 and no one joined her's either. So, it must me rare...again...a good thing!

I'm not strong at all, I somehow muster up enough for the next battle ttc and hopefully we will be joining you in parenthood soon! Take care

[Mom_2_One]

Hi there,
If you don't feel strong, then you are brave; willing to face difficult siguations in spite of fearfulness. I think there is a strong chance that you will be successful with the four remaining embryos that you have. It's not over till it's over. And congratulations for making it so far in your DE-cycle. It's AWESOME that you have embryos left. When is your FET!?

I have had MANY BFPs in my life. My DD is now almost 5 years old and asking all of the time for a new baby. We have lost 6 naturally conceived embryos (all within a two year period), and recently had an IVF cycle with my eggs. It didn't work. We also had two leftover blasts to transfer for a FET cycle, but got BFN with that too. It has been a very hard and sad road. After failing ivf/fet with my eggs, I finally decided to stop wasting time and find a way to justfiy spending tons of money on DE-IVF which is not covered by my insurance plan. One of my biggest fears about DE is that it won't work for me. But, like you, I am brave and willing to risk a lot for the chance to try. That's all we can do in life; try our best. I think that a certain satisfaction can come from that even if we "fail".

As far as you feeling like your situation is rare, well, I just don't think that is the case. A few cliincs have an 80-95% DE-success rate, but many have a 60-75% success rate, so, there are other women out there who have failed DE cycles. I hope that you've been able to find some support on the other site you mentioned. Besides, you have not failed! Sometimes IVF does not work on the with the first transfer, but the FETs are successful. You have 4 embryos waiting for you. So, you are NOT out of the game yet.

Please feel free to PM me if you would like. Also, if you decide to do a FET please PM me to let me know. I would like to voluntee to virtually hold you hand if you decide to move forward with that. I'm hoping that you get your "Little Victoria, or Little Victor" soon.
All the best...
Victoria

[rjc0704]

You're an angel, Victoria, thank you! Virtual hugs, hand holding, listening ears, advice, and caring hearts ALWAYS welcome...and given as well! I sent you a looooonnnnng PM! (sorry)

[Mom_2_One]

Hi There,
I just wanted to say that I hope your trip went well. When you have a chance, let me know how it went.
GL!!!!
Victoria

[labbatts]

rjc - so sorry for the failed cycle. As Mom 2 One stated, you have A LOT of hope with the frosties. Take care.

Nicole

[rjc0704]

Nicole - thanks for the well wishes. I sure hope you'll get to cycle sooner than expected! The differences in clinics can be significant. Does this clinic have their own donor pool? Curious if that is why the wait times were so differnent between the two.

Victoria - Hope you and family are doing well! Any updates on your end? I know there is a lot of research to do and a lot of decisions to make. You seem very patient and diligent and I know you and DH will make the best decision together.

Thanks for asking about our trip. We spent most our time in Phoenix because Mexico was a bit scary. Not the greatest location and shopping was poor. Had alot of of people asking us if we needed prescriptions. Very strange area. Thankfully the Dr drove us over the boarder and we didn't have to be stressed. Overall, a very decent and adventerous trip. The doctor worked directly under Dr. Beers as a student and told us some nice stories about him. He speaks broken english so a bit hard to understand him and his staff knew basically no English, so the language barrier was intimidating, but we managed.

I sat in his office in a chair with my forearms stretched out on his desk. It seemed a bit strange, but I went with it. Then he injected the serum under the skin 4x on each arm. As he started the same routine on the other arm, he began to explain what to avoid and what to expect over the next few days. Then suddenly I had a reaction. I got very dizzy and queezy and nearly fainted. It scared the heck out of me and dh. They walked me to the bed and reclined it to raise my feet above my head. Thankfully it passed.

He told me the LIT would help with my elevated NKa activity and cytokines in addition to my borderline LADs. So I will be saving tons of money on other treatments needed for those things. I will have to repeat blood work in about 3-4 weeks to see how well I responded.

On the way home we had an emergency landing in Denver. A woman sitting next me collasped and had to be rushed to hospital. Thankfully there was a Dr on board and they said the medics released her in Denver. I think she was terrified of flying and wanted off the plane. Poor woman, traveling alone and stuck in Denver....long ways from east coast!

I have a pre-op appt today for the surgery this Tuesday to remove my tube. Nervous, but anxious to get it over with. Both of my REs (Shady Grove and Yale) told me the hydrosalpinx could be the reason for our failed de cycles. Of course, nosey me has to keep digging. I went on the SIRM message board and Dr. Sher said that if the hydro was only visible via HSG dye then I shouldn't have the surgery and that is wasn't the issue. That was discouraging to hear. Doing the surgery anyway. My eggs are about shot at age 43, with very low reserve and bouncing FSH, it's not a big jump to 0%from a 4% chance of natural conception w/ a 60% chance of m/c.

[flicka7]

Just wanted you to know that support is here for you but it's hard to participate in this board because of the long threads. Glad you're asking for help!

I did 6 IVF's before moving on to DE, then had a BFN on my fresh transfer. That BFN was far more devastating to me than the other ones cause I thought for sure it was going to work with DE. I had 5 embryos frozen, went on to do 2 more transfers and had 3 children from my FET's.

I hope your surgery goes well and that is the issue for you. How soon can you do an FET after the surgery?

[Mom_2_One]

Rhonda,
Your trip sounds hair raising! I will pray that the LIT works for you. GL with your surgery next week...I'm wishing for your speedy recovery.

I've chosen my donor and clinic. The clinic has really high live birth rates. I'll be meeting the doc on Saturday. I hope that his success will rub off on us! Our donor is 20 years old and open to meeting; so, DH and I are good.

Keep me posted about your progress.
-Victoria