donor and lawyers

Julie_MA · 08-09-2005, 03:22 PM

Hi all,

Dh and I are preparing for a DI cycle. We have never been through this before and I feel like this situation is so much more complex then doing ART with our own eggs/sperm. I probably have the most stupid question ever but, here goes...What I am wondering is should we have a lawyer look over the paperwork to make sure that if/when a child is conceived that we have full legal custody? Or are the standard documents that we and the donor sign through the cryobank sufficient? And if so, are there lawyers out there that specialize in this type of stuff??? I haven't read a post yet that mentioned lawyers but the thought crossed my mind and I figured I'd ask. I just want to make sure I do things right...I feel like we've wasted enough time already! Take care ladies. Thanks!

Julie
Me: 30 Dh:31
dx: severe MF ttc #1: 6 yrs
2 IUIs bfn
6 IVF (tried ICSI, AH & PGD)
1 chem. pg. 1 m/c @ 6wks. 4 bfns
moving to DI

GivingAgain · 08-09-2005, 05:30 PM

As a donor, I had to go to a lawyer and sign away my rights as a potential parent. I also got to read the stuff the parents would be signing, and it seems like those are pretty clear about who the legal parents are.

The lawyer that I saw (my agency hooked us up) specializes in adoption and fertility law. My agency hooked us up, but I think you could find specialists in your area through a Google search.

As a former worker in the child welfare system, as far as I know, when the mother gives birth to a baby (her eggs or not), it's her baby unless she signs the rights away. If she is married to a male partner, he is the presumptive father unless he signs away his rights as well.

Good luck!

Julie_MA · 08-10-2005, 01:48 PM

Thanks for your response. I think I'll call the RE's office tomorrow and see what they say or if they have any policies on this. I also wanted to thank you for the amazing gift that you are about to give to someone. Really, truly, and honestly it takes a very special person to give a gift like the one you are giving...you are helping to make dreams come true! Good luck in your cycle.

Julie

**BC-MAV** · 08-10-2005, 06:41 PM

The egg donor I do think signs something giving away any rights. Once embryos are created they are YOURS!!!

kara6820 · 08-10-2005, 07:30 PM

Most definately you shoud get your own laywer. We just met with ours and there were so many things we had not thought of. We are using a friend as the egg donor so it is a bit different than with an anonoymous donor but still, I think you should have your own legal representation too. Ours cost $700 at a flat rate so was not too expensive. This is your child/children you are talking about so go and make sure what you are signing is in your best interest!!!

Julie_MA · 08-12-2005, 08:51 AM

Thanks for your advice ladies. Dh and I are not using a known donor but, we have appointment with the infertility counselor on Tues. so I will bring it up then. I will see what the RE's office recommends and then take it from there. Thanks again and best of luck to you.

Julie

08-09-2005, 03:22 PM	#1 (permalink)
Julie_MA Registered User Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 255	donor and lawyers Hi all, Dh and I are preparing for a DI cycle. We have never been through this before and I feel like this situation is so much more complex then doing ART with our own eggs/sperm. I probably have the most stupid question ever but, here goes...What I am wondering is should we have a lawyer look over the paperwork to make sure that if/when a child is conceived that we have full legal custody? Or are the standard documents that we and the donor sign through the cryobank sufficient? And if so, are there lawyers out there that specialize in this type of stuff??? I haven't read a post yet that mentioned lawyers but the thought crossed my mind and I figured I'd ask. I just want to make sure I do things right...I feel like we've wasted enough time already! Take care ladies. Thanks! Julie Me: 30 Dh:31 dx: severe MF ttc #1: 6 yrs 2 IUIs bfn 6 IVF (tried ICSI, AH & PGD) 1 chem. pg. 1 m/c @ 6wks. 4 bfns moving to DI

08-10-2005, 01:48 PM	#3 (permalink)
Julie_MA Registered User Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 255	GivingAgain Thanks for your response. I think I'll call the RE's office tomorrow and see what they say or if they have any policies on this. I also wanted to thank you for the amazing gift that you are about to give to someone. Really, truly, and honestly it takes a very special person to give a gift like the one you are giving...you are helping to make dreams come true! Good luck in your cycle. Julie Last edited by Julie_MA; 08-12-2005 at 08:46 AM.

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08-09-2005, 05:30 PM	#2 (permalink)
GivingAgain Registered User Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 2	As a donor, I had to go to a lawyer and sign away my rights as a potential parent. I also got to read the stuff the parents would be signing, and it seems like those are pretty clear about who the legal parents are. The lawyer that I saw (my agency hooked us up) specializes in adoption and fertility law. My agency hooked us up, but I think you could find specialists in your area through a Google search. As a former worker in the child welfare system, as far as I know, when the mother gives birth to a baby (her eggs or not), it's her baby unless she signs the rights away. If she is married to a male partner, he is the presumptive father unless he signs away his rights as well. Good luck!

08-10-2005, 06:41 PM	#4 (permalink)
BC-MAV Board Coordinator for Surrogacy BB Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: way down yonder ... Posts: 29,651 Blog Entries: 50	The egg donor I do think signs something giving away any rights. Once embryos are created they are YOURS!!!

08-10-2005, 07:30 PM	#5 (permalink)
kara6820 Registered User Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Illinois Posts: 388	Most definately you shoud get your own laywer. We just met with ours and there were so many things we had not thought of. We are using a friend as the egg donor so it is a bit different than with an anonoymous donor but still, I think you should have your own legal representation too. Ours cost $700 at a flat rate so was not too expensive. This is your child/children you are talking about so go and make sure what you are signing is in your best interest!!!

08-12-2005, 08:51 AM	#6 (permalink)
Julie_MA Registered User Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Massachusetts Posts: 255	Thanks for your advice ladies. Dh and I are not using a known donor but, we have appointment with the infertility counselor on Tues. so I will bring it up then. I will see what the RE's office recommends and then take it from there. Thanks again and best of luck to you. Julie