by, 07-23-2012 at 10:59 AM (539 Views)
We got the call this morning to let us know that Larry (the big overachiever) is no longer viable and will not become a frozen siblingsicle. I am very sad but knew in my heart that he was not likely to survive after reading the literature on 12-cell day 3 embies with no evidence of compacting... he had a heck of a start but he wasn't able to make it to the big leagues.
I've been quite sad but I know that if he was meant to survive he would have, whether or not he had been transferred. Thank God nobody was at work yet this morning as I sat at my desk weeping.
I will always have a part of me that grieves the loss of who he might have been on Earth. He will be remembered and held in our hearts as our precious embaby in Heaven.
I have faith that we are not given more than we can handle, and that everything happens for a reason. It would have been hard for us to raise twins and then a sibling, so as much as it hurts, perhaps that option was removed for a reason. I really hope that our other two make it!!!
I'm praying that Curly and Moe dig in deep and decide to stay... any time within the next few days they will be burrowing in if they are going to burrow. The evidence should show up in my blood by the middle to end of next week, but I'm doing pee tests starting early next week. I got a bunch of cheapies from the internet from a medical supply place for 50 cents each.
I'm doubling my efforts to be gentle with my body to protect the little ones I have left. Send our little embabies love and luck as they "hatch" and dig into the uterine lining!! At my ultrasound I had a beautiful triple layer endometrium that was the perfect thickness for little embabies to nestle into and get nourishment from.
If it's not too much to ask, when you have a moment today and over the next few weeks, please keep our in-utero embabies in your thoughts and prayers. It can't hurt and it most certainly CAN help!!