TwoQTs

I've been crying since before 6 am. Work was bad again as usual; ended up sobbing in the mgr's office yet again. He won't move me to produce b/c he says it would be a waste.. of my 'managerial skills' & money. So, I'm stuck. He wants me to take a managerial position but again it would mean a paycut. I am now willing to look at options should the right one open up.

The BIG HR people were down all day yesterday. One supervisor was fired (nice kid but lazy & completely discouraged as well). Rumour has it that he's the first & that a couple more are on the chopping block.

More threats from J yesterday.. they had a mtg & were told to shape up or be fired. He came right downstairs & told me 'I' needed to be doing more or 'I' would be fired. HA!!!!! More like HE will be...

Store mgr also told me J was telling him yesterday that I am the best worked & the most valuable part of the 'team.' I asked Ken... then why doesn't he treat me better???? If you want someone to stay, shouldn't you suck up or at least be neutral???? K had no answer.

The other ass't told a mgr he wants the job they're trying to get me to take. A said.. why???? (dumbfounded) R said.. 'I'm a rat.' 'Not following you.' 'Rats leave the sinking ship, don't they?' I said to A.. (who I'd been crying to just then...) 'I told you it is very bad in our dept.' He was quite surprised. Not that he doesn't believe me, but for a hardened old meat cutter to want to leave 2 yrs before retirement... that's something.

My head & eyes hurt so badly & my jaw is so painful from clenching. I would give anything to call in sick tomorrow. I won't give J the satisfaction.