http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/ Infertility and Adoption online interactive support community for your family-building efforts. Information and discussion includes infertility, adoption, pregnancy, parenting and surrogacy issues. en Wed, 19 Jun 2013 08:33:06 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/images/misc/rss.jpg http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/ http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/59513-woke-up-morning-my-thighs-tingling.html Fri, 30 Dec 2005 17:35:07 GMT You know how you feel after running a good race? A long one, where you pushed yourself?

I don't know if it was my whopping two mile run in 18 minutes Tuesday or if it was pushing that 80 pound bale of hay up the Mt. Everest of my property, but my thighs are whipped.

I'm taking off from exercising today.

Too tired.

Speaking of being tired, TJ napped yesterday from 1-3 (at daycare), then fell asleep on the drive home from daycare and napped from 5-8:30 and then went to bed around 10. The kid was zonked.

I slept well too.

Will I be asking too much if I want another full night's sleep tonight??? ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/59513-woke-up-morning-my-thighs-tingling.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/59553-different-kind-workout-today.html Thu, 29 Dec 2005 21:48:59 GMT After a bad sleeping night, I got up early to feed the animals. Realized that we were out of hay, so I rolled the wheelbarrow down to get some hay. We found a new supplier, who is supplying much better hay, but oh my god, he bales them in these things that are about four feet long and weigh close... After a bad sleeping night, I got up early to feed the animals. Realized that we were out of hay, so I rolled the wheelbarrow down to get some hay. We found a new supplier, who is supplying much better hay, but oh my god, he bales them in these things that are about four feet long and weigh close to 80 pounds. I nearly gave myself a hernia lifting that thing into the wheelbarrow, much less pushing it up to where I can feed the horses. I was sweating like a racehorse by the time I got it where it needs to be. Forget about lifting it out and putting it in the shed for easy retrieval. I wheeled it under cover and will just pull flakes out each day and night until the thing is gone.

My upper arms ached, my legs ached, my back ached.

That was enough of a workout for me today.

Wish I knew someone with a jacuzzi...I sure could use one. ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/59553-different-kind-workout-today.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/59681-dec-27-can-we-begin-christmas-celebrations-next-week.html Tue, 27 Dec 2005 22:34:52 GMT I'm pathetic, really and truly pathetic with some things. My house was a disaster on Christmas morning. No new presents under the tree from Santa (they were still in the middle of the living room floor with the wrapping paper). Christmas cards were strewn about on the table. It looked like a pig sty. TJ's 3 1/2 and this is the last year...the absolute last year (mark my words) that I will be unprepared for Christmas. Two years ago my lesson learned was to put up the tree before December 22nd. Last year my lesson learned after Christmas was to clean out old toys before Christmas. Mission accomplished there. This year my lesson learned will be to get all cards out in the mail Thanksgiving weekend. Take a day off, somewhere around the 15th and do all the shopping and wrapping in that one day.

I'd be in good shape if Christmas were next week, but since it was two days ago, I'm a bit behind...I still have overseas gifts to ship!!! (Yikes)!

The holiday was still nice, my family respected my wishes to ease up on the number of gifts he got. Dh's family did not. He ended up with only about forty gifts (four were from Santa, dh & me). About ten books, a couple of trains, a couple of movies, some Spiderman stuff, an Easy Bake Oven (my budding chef), Woody, Buzz Light Year rocket ship, a couple of fire engines. Maybe it wasn't quite forty. I stopped counting quite honestly. It wasn't too many, though, and that was a bonus. As I suspected, he opened his first gift and wanted to play with it, didn't care a hoot about any of the other gifts.

Let's see, what else. It rained, too bad it couldn't have all been snow. I love the snow.

Worked out today for the first time in over a week. Ran two miles and a few tenths...at a good pace. Four sprints in a 20 minute period. Good enough to get my heart rate going and my pituitary glands pumping (those are the sweat glands, right)? The gym was disgustingly hot today. Ugh, I hate running when it's that warm. Then I lifted some weights. My shoulders already ache. I'm going to feel it tomorrow. That's ok, though, I'll do a lower body workout tomorrow and give my upper body a rest.

We took down our Christmas tree yesterday. I was bound and determined to do it. If I can get everything cleaned up, then I can jump right into ski season without having to miss any more weekends. Plus the tree was beginning to worry me. It still had a lot of moisture in it, but it was dropping needles like crazy and that always makes me concerned.

This year we're going to try and get TJ up on skis. I hope he likes it...if not then I guess we'll stay inside and play trains for a couple of months...

Jeanie ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/59681-dec-27-can-we-begin-christmas-celebrations-next-week.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/60010-no-workouts-week.html Tue, 20 Dec 2005 20:24:20 GMT I thought Christmas was a week away.

I'm woefully unprepared.

Went shopping at lunch yesterday, went out early today and shopped and had a holiday pot luck luncheon today. Did a little bit of on-line shopping and I'm (thankfully) just about done. I'll need to overnight ship a couple of gifts...my own fault for waiting so late.

I am so stuffed from the holiday party I really should go and walk on the treadmill but I just can't get myself up out of this Herman Miller chair to do so.

I'll (truthfully) be glad when the holiday is over. I don't know what it is, I'm just not really enjoying it.

Something needs to change so that I do have fun with it next year...I have a couple of ideas (letting people know in October that I will not be participating in a gift exchange). I really would prefer to just get together.

We'll see...

Jeanie ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/60010-no-workouts-week.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/60216-workouts-back.html Fri, 16 Dec 2005 19:08:10 GMT I made it to the gym all five days this week. Hallelujah. (Or however that word is spelled). It was rough at first. We've been battling some pretty nasty sleep issues. I'm plum worn out. But I stuck with it. It doesnt' really bother me (too much) that I can't run fast. It doesn't really bother me (too much) that I can't run too long. I'm doing it. And that keeps me going. No matter what the American Heart Association says (at least 18 minutes of cardio a day), the plain and simple fact is that it keeps me in shape, makes my afternoons much more pleasant, and I feel so much better afterwards.

I started off running at something like 10.5 minute pace, and today I had whiddled that down to a 9.5 minute pace. A little over 2 miles in 20 minutes, nothing medal worthy, but it gets my heart rate going and I sweat out bad stuff, so I'll be back at it on Monday.

Guys I work with are now in the gym too. I really enjoy their company, but there are only two treadmills and three of us. It's a big joke as to who gets there first, one of the treadmills is positioned under a vent, so it's the most desired one. I actually don't mind biking or doing the elliptical...cross training...just in case I ever decide to attempt a triatholon (LOL).

Any way, the nice thing about the guys being in there is that when we talk while running, it's not quite as torturous. So, I gabbed like a little kid today. It worked. Those 20 minutes went by pretty quickly.

TJ slept through the night the past two nights. (Thank you Gods of Sleep). What a difference it makes. Last night I was going to drug him...but Andrew put him down and he went down easily and stayed down, so I guess we'll just play this out and see how it goes.

Andrew & I have a date tonight. We're going to dinner and then we'll see the Harry Potter movie. I'm looking forward to it. He & I need to spend a little more time together.

Ski season has begun too. He patrolled Wednesday evening and works this weekend. Can't wait to get on the slopes myself. I hope TJ likes it (and I hope we can find some really cheap (as in free) equipment for him!

Am going to start my Christmas shopping tomorrow (heck - there's almost two weeks left - I figure it's about time). I don't know why I've had such a hard time wanting to start.

Addressed our Christmas cards last night. I hope to get those in the mail next Monday (I'll sit down and hand write notes to some...others will just get the perfunctory card). ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/60216-workouts-back.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/61117-11-30-2005-05-53-pm.html Wed, 30 Nov 2005 22:53:51 GMT Ok, just to make sure everyone understands my teeny tiny limited sense of warped humor, this exercise blog of mine is part poke at myself for what a slug I am, part journaling to keep me honest, and part record keeping to keep me motivated. I also, to tell the truth, want to do it to encourage... Ok, just to make sure everyone understands my teeny tiny limited sense of warped humor, this exercise blog of mine is part poke at myself for what a slug I am, part journaling to keep me honest, and part record keeping to keep me motivated. I also, to tell the truth, want to do it to encourage others that they don't have to go out an run 10 miles to get back into shape. Or, they don't have to run fast. They just have to go out and get their heart rate up. It's really an individual thing...and if my (shameless) admission of what I do (and don't do), helps others, then, hey, read on John Q Public.

I also figure if other people can see how pathetic I am as a runner, no one will make the mistake of asking me to run races with them anymore. (I ran a race with this woman and her husband several years ago...they were so kind...he actually stood on a fire hydrant for about 15 minutes waiting for me to catch up to them).

Any way, I ran a mind boggling 2 miles today in 20 minutes 40 seconds. I really need to stop being so casual about it and start pushing myself again. I'm over my illness, and TJ is sleeping through the night again (YEAH)!!!, so it's high time I start working on a 7 minute mile.

Tomorrow...I'll begin tomorrow.

Oh - and no headaches today. ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/61117-11-30-2005-05-53-pm.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/61263-day-2-back-treadmill.html Mon, 28 Nov 2005 20:43:40 GMT I had a raging headache this morning. Popped four aspirin in the hopes of getting it under control. I wonder if it's because I had sugar free hot chocolate this morning...I won't drink any tomorrow and I'll see how I feel.

So, I went to the gym at lunch, thinking there was no way I could run because of my pounding head. I began walking, and then picked up a slow jog. 1.7 miles in 18 minutes. Nothing to sky write about, but it got my heart rate up, and that's why I keep at it. I need to get my cholesterol checked...it was 274 three years ago...it was 220 last spring. I refuse to go on medication for it. It's always been high, even when I was 20 years old it was above 200. If I would just lay off the sweets for an extended period of time and let my body fix itself I bet it would go down even more.

Any way, the four aspirin did the trick with the headache and I was able to have a decent jog. Didn't lift any weights today, but I did do 80 crunches. I guess if I laid off the sweets I'd lose my little pooh belly too... ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/61263-day-2-back-treadmill.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/61495-back-exercise-blog.html Wed, 23 Nov 2005 19:13:05 GMT Ya know, a good rest is always a good thing, but man is it hard to get back into it. It's so much easier to go out and eat a cheeseburger for lunch, or grab some sushi. And yet, after the workout, I always feel so much better. Today was no exception.

I ran at a leisurely 11 minute pace (figuring I'd ease back into it). Did a whopping 1.9 miles in 20 minutes. Woo hoo - watch out all you fast runners, Miss Snail here is too far behind you to eat your dust!

Stretched, 60 crunches (again---easing back into it) and then my beloved butt exercises. Man they were a godsend to find. Sitting on my duff all day at a computer can really maximize my gluteous maximus. I found these exercises, all done on the floor, that can really isolate the muscles right around the butt.

So my Thankgiving thankful right now is that I have a gym at my office that I can use. There are showers too so I can work up a sweat and still come back to work without smelling like a racehorse. It's a great fringe benefit to working here. A really great benefit. ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/61495-back-exercise-blog.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/64341-back.html Mon, 03 Oct 2005 18:53:07 GMT I've really stopped blogging. More from a lack of time than anything else.

That and the fact that my exercise routine is really really bumming me out.

About six weeks ago I decided to do what the "experts" recommend and mixed up my workout. Decided to bike two days a week, run two days a week and use a cross trainer one day a week. I lift different weights now, and do different ab work.

My biking has definitely improved, but my running sucks.

I had a good workout today, my legs are going to be mighty sore tomorrow. I only ran 2 miles, which is about average I guess. I run for 20 minutes (or bike or cross train), then stretch and then do weights. I'm really lucky with this gym here at the office. Without it I wouldn't exercise at all.

Another thing that is really making me sad...my poor horses think I hate them. I just don't have time to spend with them right now. TJ isn't sleeping well, so I take every minute I can for shuteye. I used to get out of bed around 5 and spend about an hour and a half with them every morning. Now if I'm out of bed by 6:30 it's a miracle. Usually TJ wakes and I get up. It's hard, I jsut don't know what to do with him. He sees an "angry" face in the mirror, or there's a monster outside of his window. I just realized this has been going on since early July, when we moved him out of his crib and into a twin bed. I think since July, he's slept through the night four times. He goes back to sleep right away when he wakes (as long as I'm there) but man it's tough. Two or three nights ago he fell out of bed (I put down cushions just in case) and I awoke to him saying in a pitiful little voice "mommy can you help me." Poor kid was so disoriented I don't think he realized where he was. Then last night (or was it two nights ago) he awoke and said "mommy where are you?" My house is tiny, my bedroom is right next to his. He is so tired, too. I'm going to try melatonin tonight. Anything to get him the sleep he needs.

The new grocery store opened at the mall near us. 18,000 people attended. I'm not bitter, per se, but boy does it make me a little sad that my hope of opening a children's play place there didn't work out. I swear even a bad business man could make money there. And I'm not a bad business man.

oh well. That water's already under the bridge, or whatever that saying is, and I'm not going to dwell on it. Like I said earlier, without this gym here at my office, I'd never get any exercise.

Gained a couple of pounds the past two weeks. (The same five pounds I have gained and lost at least a dozen times in the past two years). I was just incredibly hungry. Eating sandwiches at lunch (I never eat sandwiches...always get a soup and salad). Ice cream at night. A donut a couple of times in the morning. It was an absurd amount of food that I had been eating. I'm back to normal now though, so I imagine these couple of pounds will slowly come off until my next feast.

This is enough for now (and boy is it enough).

Back to work... ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/64341-back.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/65290-weather-so-nice.html Thu, 08 Sep 2005 21:02:56 GMT We've actually had to close the windows at night because it's too cool. I love this time of year. There's something very earthy to me when leaves begin to decompose.

I had a really pathetic run today. I've been battling sleep issues with TJ...he is going to bed so late and last night he woke up twice. Once because of a nightmare (a giant squid was eating him) and then the second time he had to go to the bathroom. His ear infection (I believe) is cleared up and he's sleeping better once he goes to sleep, but it's usually 10 o'clock before he nods off. Way too late for my little boy. If we don't head to the beach this weekend (a friend of Andrew's invited us) I'm going to try some melatonin and get him back to an 8:30 bedtime. The poor kid just can't wind down at night...he'll sit in his bed and play. And then he sleeps too late, which we just let him do, but then it makes our days begin later and later. I didn't get in to work today until 10 am. I guess I forget how lucky I am to have this job that I really do have that kind of flexibility.

Any way, back to my pathetic run. I ran a mile. One lousy mile and then walked. I've changed my workout routine so that I only run on Tuesdays and Thursdays...I ride a bike on Mondays and Wednesdays and then on Fridays I use a cross trainer. My weight training is going well...I'm building up the amount of weight I can lift and the muscles are becoming defined so that's working well.

For the Katrina victims, I still have a ton of stuff to ship. Somewhere. Anywhere. I just don't know where to send it. Need to get on the horn with that and find a place.

I also am gathering stuff to send to a friend who is sending stuff to an orphanage. I had this bright idea of outfitting the kids at this orphanage with properly sized shoes and F.C.L. informed me that they probably could use toilet paper just as badly. Toilet paper! I can't even fathom not having toilet paper. We live on a farm, so I regularly pee outside without wiping. But, to not have access to something so ... what is the word ...so hygenic...it really puzzles me why things are. Why some people are born into such wealth and others are born into a life of not having toilet paper to wipe themselves with when they pee. It's a mystery to me...and a mystery that concerns me much more than the supposed mystery of the holy trinity. Who cares when there are little three year old girls out there who can't walk because they've never had properly fitting shoes?

harumph.

Not to make this a religion gripe, but I'm reading a book right now (when my darling son finally nods off at 10:15 pm) and it's pretty much just enraging me when the author claims that God has a purpose for each and every one of us. I think it's really easy to say that when you have food in your belly and a warm roof over your head. But how in the world can anyone rationalize some superior being putting innocent children on this earth just to suffer? Some may say it's so that I become a better person. Well you know what I say to that? pffffffft. Make me a better person by making me suffer...don't make a three year old girl suffer.

Religion at the moment is really pissing me off.

ha ha...I was going to change the title of this note to something derogatory about religion, but then it may get some views which I don't particularly care to read. So I'll keep it plain and boring and about the weather.

Jeanie ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/65290-weather-so-nice.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/66304-great-workout-today.html Thu, 11 Aug 2005 19:07:08 GMT Wow, I had an excellent run today. This, in spite of being awakened at midnight with a stupid phone call from work. And then being awakened at 4 am with a potty emergency.

Lifted weights too. Pushed myself...I know I'm going to feel it tomorrow but it just felt so good to try and do a few more reps at a higher weight.

Work is sucky right now. Ok - enough of my gripe. I have to remind myself it's my choice to work.

Andrew's building TJ a swing set right now. I need to get the video camera out to watch TJ *help* Andrew when we get home at night. It's really cute to watch them interact and talk. Andrew's so patient with him, it's a joy to watch them, one I don't do often enough.

Ok, so my life is pretty good. Especially if I remind myself that my son is alive (my heart is still breaking for Kerri - whom I don't know at all - but so many people I love love her so she must be pretty cool...and Doreen). I really have no room to complain.

I kind of hope no one reads this... ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/66304-great-workout-today.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/66354-08-10-2005-10-21-am.html Wed, 10 Aug 2005 14:21:31 GMT Had a fire in the oven last night. Stupid stupid mistake. I began to panick and ripped the fire extinguisher off the wall, but keeping the oven door closed suffocated the flames just fine. Two things I now know I must get...one of those metal container things for ashes and a new smoke alarm. ... Had a fire in the oven last night. Stupid stupid mistake. I began to panick and ripped the fire extinguisher off the wall, but keeping the oven door closed suffocated the flames just fine.

Two things I now know I must get...one of those metal container things for ashes and a new smoke alarm. Ours never went off. Almost kind of useless, I'm afraid.

I'm committed to working out today. I skipped last Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and yesterday and I'm really feeling it. It's amazing how that flab feels.

May post some more later. ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/66354-08-10-2005-10-21-am.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/66388-now-will-life-blog.html Tue, 09 Aug 2005 14:54:25 GMT Two months to the day since I last posted. Wow. I've been reading CathyNY's blog and Doreen's. CathyNY wants to be a published writer...that girl certainly has the talent for it.

Doreen's blog is so painfully raw, it's hard to read it and not be able to show up with a box of chocolate truffles, a bottle of Sangria and a box of tissues.

As for me, I've been too busy at work. Normally my job is pretty slow and it keeps me sane. But I had a huge project to do, probably could have done it ok with a couple of people but the people I work with are slackers so I did it myself. Had to work a couple of nights, in addition to an eight hour day and some weekend work. I'm too old to work those kinds of hours anymore.

Then, when I get home, I have the whole dinner, bath, bedtime routine. It just gets tiring, ya know? Andrew will do whatever I ask of him, but sometimes I just wish he would take the initiative and take care of something without my asking.

I made a decision about 2 or 3 weeks ago to stop ttc, or rather, to not try to clean my uterus before transferring our two frozen. The thing is, well, it's hard. Andrew's a wonderful husband and a pretty good dad. But he's a man, and he's perfectly fine with letting me do the lions share of the work. So, if we were to have another baby, I'd be back where I was three years ago. He'd be better of course, so would I, but I still would be the one who gets up in the middle of the night (why do I have such a hard time nudging him), I'd be the one making the doctor's appt's, doing the school field trips, laundry, play dates, grocery shopping. The majority of the burden would fall on my shoulders, and I quite honestly don't want it. We don't make a good parenting team. And that makes me a little sad, but it's the plain hard cold truth.

I'm ok with the decision. I remember always saying that I wanted lots of children, but I'd start with one and see how my husband did. Well, here I am and I think we're going to stop at one.

My brother- and sister-in-law split two weeks ago. They've had problems off and on for about 10 years. I noticed the problems with the birth of their third child (10 years ago). It's sad, very sad. I hate to say it, but my observations were that he didn't want a third, she did, and their marraige never was the same. It's a gamble when a woman gets pregnant against her husband's wishes. I'm ashamed to admit that I have contemplated going ahead and getting pregnant without Andrew's unconditional full 100% support. But I remember the nights, and decided a much better approach is to quit while we're ahead.

I need to tell him to have a vasectomy. I feel like it's his responsibility. I went through hell to have a child...he can take care of me not having any more.

I'll post again after that conversation... ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/66388-now-will-life-blog.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/67448-6-9-05.html Fri, 10 Jun 2005 16:59:17 GMT Ran 2.26 miles. It feels good to be able to get out and run and not feel like my lungs are going to explode.

A friends father is in congestive heart failure. He had warnings but did nothing about it.

So sad.

I'm going to get my cholesterol checked in a couple of weeks. That's my one nemesis to good health. We'll see if my exercise and improved diet has done anything for it.

Total mileage in 2005: 33.52 miles. ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/67448-6-9-05.html http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/67464-06-08-2005-03-19-pm.html Wed, 08 Jun 2005 19:19:06 GMT Has it really been two entire months since I've written? Wow. My exercising has been alittle better, thankfully. Still not back to five days a week, but I've been running about 2 miles a day 3 days a week. Ran a race last weekend, just a 5K, was pleased with how I felt at the end of it.

I can now run sprints at 7.5 minutes and am pretty hopeful that I will be able to whiddle down my normal pace to 8.5 or 8 minute miles.

2.26 miles today in 20 minutes. ]]> JeanieMd http://www.fertilethoughts.com/forums/blogs/jeaniemd/67464-06-08-2005-03-19-pm.html