hopeing41

I should never have ever grounded her, made her care about school, kept her from certain friends houses because their families are druggy, I shouldn't have cared. Then she would want to be with me.

But would you have wanted to be with her?

Seriously.

You are the best thing that ever happened to that girl.

Your right but it still sucks, and I see her wanting to be where there are no rules, no authoirty, no care, and I hate that because it makes me feel like my time and care was a tear down not a bring up ya know.

Thanks

Noah tells me all the time that when he gets older that he will go live with dad. Dad is fun. Dad has no rules or structure. I am the mean one. I know if Noah goes that it won’t be long until the other two do as well. It makes me sad to think of them living “that” life…but I know that there is going to come a time that I will have choice but to let them go.

I know it’s a different situation, as your DN is now half way across the country…I am not trying to belittle your situation…just thinking out loud.

Right now I am focusing on molding these kids, shaping them & loving them enough to send them out into the world someday. I am trying to teach them right from wrong, even if they don’t always chose the best one. I want them to know you can learn from mistakes. I want mine to be the voice that rings in their head…the nagging they feel when they make the wrong choice and the values that I instilled in them to make amends when they do. I guess my feeling is that my job is to love them as much as I can, do the best I can. I think that as parents we all are doing that. I think none of us know how long (or short) our time with them will be.

I am glad your DN had the chance to be loved by you.

And the way I feel about is that someday Noah won’t resent me so much. Someday he will understand.

Hopefully she will too.