maybe this will help, i don't know. i feel like i am at a crossroads. don't know what to do with my life. kid is up, will finish later.

i have been so unhappy lately. feeling like i can't do anything well. not my job, be a mom and definitely not be a good wife. i have no interest in having sex and haven't for a long time. sometimes i think about divorce. 7 yr itch maybe? frustrated with his inability to follow thru on ANYTHING??? i feel so angry at him right now and i can't even pinpoint why. it's like the same argument over and over again and he never changes. ever. he can be so full of s***. do most people feel this...

Says Mama, Dada, Baba, Uh oh
Still loves Petey
Crawls ALL OVER THE PLACE
Tried to crawl up the stairs to get DH yesterday
Laughs and smiles a lot
Gives hugs and kisses (well, open mouth with some teeth involved sometimes )
Pulls up on everything - the walls, the dishwasher, the shower, the couch, the bed, the coffee table, his highchair, the door, etc.
Lets you hold his hands to walk but not for very long.
Loves to bang things together,...

I quit my job on April the 5th. My last day is the 26th. I am officially freaking out. I should not have given 3 weeks, my god, am I B-O-R-E-D. Didn't want to burn any bridges with a job I have never liked, does that make any sense? No, it doesn't.
I am worried about $$, property tax bill due at the end of the month, the cc bill for my brakes is due, twonship tax bill due in July, me, oh my, bad timing. It always seems to work itself out but ACK!
I am worried that Jack will...

Gets so excited when he sees the box of Cheerios
Squeals (high pitched) when he sees Petey
Gives big slobbery, open mouth kiss attempts
Gave me a baby hug this morning
Holds on to his feet at any opportunity
Loves to be tickled
Likes it when you whisper in his ear

Gawd, I just love that kid.

And I am feeling extremely anxious about it. I haven't been back to SF since long before I lost Olivia, Feb 2003. We've been to SoCal since then but not back to our old stomping grounds, SF. DH hasn't been back since the summer after we moved to PA, 2002. I haven't seen my best friend from college since the last SF visit, life, pregnancy, loss,etc have taken over. I am anxious about traveling with Jack, he really is a good baby but who knows if the devil will appear during the flights. I am...

I am having one of those days where everything and almost everyone annoys me or I don't like it. It started this morning when DH wanted to switch cars so he could take his boss to work, who need to bring in a filing cabinet. I had a box in back that I need to mail out, does he put in his car (that I am now driving) NOOOOOO!!!!! So irritating, particularly because I asked him about 14 times if he moved and he was getting annoyed with me asking him so many times!!! Argh!
I hate that it is...

Decided to blog again today and saw these and couldn't resist:

1. I hate armpits. Male armpit hair really grosses me out.
2. I have a scar that runs from ear to ear from sinus surgery when I was 22.
3. I am still in love with my college boyfriend.
4. My parents are still happily married after 42 years of marriage.
5. I can't stand to watch people eat meat of a bone - ribs, etc. Yech.
6. I am over sensitive to loud noises and repetitive noises -...

I have been toying with the idea of starting this and finally decided to do it. I used to try and journal (the therapist I saw after Olivia died suggested it and it did help a lot)but now when I get home, there are not many free minutes, especially ones where I am thinking coherently enough to write something down. So, I will do it at work (aren't I the model employee??)

While I was working out at the gym yesterday during lunch, I read an article in O magazine about Carole...