Seriously Depressed
Posted 11-17-2009 at 11:23 PM by ChrisNY
Went to the Dr. today. Was in so much pain I couldn't function. She said that the meds I am on are all that she can give me at this time.
I have a neurologist consult to be scheduled now, a pain clinic appt, a grief counselor appt and I had major bloodwork pulled for ANA panels and all autoimmune bloodwork done.
She feels it must be autoimmune along with some neurological component. I used to have a huge pain tolerance, almost to the point the Dr.s were amazed. Yet now I am probably a 7 or 8 out of a 10 by nights end. Not good. I am so very rarely below a 4. This weekend was an 8 for the most part. It took me a 1/2 hour to get out of bed this morning
I took my meds really early today so now I fear what tomorrow will bring
Just seriously sad.
Today is my 33rd birthday. I have chosen not to celebrate it. I just don't want to deal with it. DH screwed up the other day really bad and I am sick of it. How the heck do you not think about the consequences before doing something?
The boys are upset that I don't want to have the whole party that was planned. My mom cried tonight because she is sad that I am sad (we are very close and have the same condition so we feel even closer because of this).
I just don't want to deal with it. I just want tomorrow to be another day and all I am getting is a fight on my hands. Wonderful way to get what I asked for on my birthday
I really wish I had a FF button I could push.
I have a neurologist consult to be scheduled now, a pain clinic appt, a grief counselor appt and I had major bloodwork pulled for ANA panels and all autoimmune bloodwork done.
She feels it must be autoimmune along with some neurological component. I used to have a huge pain tolerance, almost to the point the Dr.s were amazed. Yet now I am probably a 7 or 8 out of a 10 by nights end. Not good. I am so very rarely below a 4. This weekend was an 8 for the most part. It took me a 1/2 hour to get out of bed this morning
I took my meds really early today so now I fear what tomorrow will bring
Just seriously sad.
Today is my 33rd birthday. I have chosen not to celebrate it. I just don't want to deal with it. DH screwed up the other day really bad and I am sick of it. How the heck do you not think about the consequences before doing something?
The boys are upset that I don't want to have the whole party that was planned. My mom cried tonight because she is sad that I am sad (we are very close and have the same condition so we feel even closer because of this).
I just don't want to deal with it. I just want tomorrow to be another day and all I am getting is a fight on my hands. Wonderful way to get what I asked for on my birthday
I really wish I had a FF button I could push.
Total Comments 4
Comments
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im so sorry you're not feeling well.
HugsPosted 11-18-2009 at 12:28 AM by scoute
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I'm sorry you're not feeling well. You mention that you're depressed. Are you taking something for that? If not, speak to your doctor about it. Praying that God gives you the strength to get through this. Hugs.Posted 11-18-2009 at 03:45 AM by MaggieM
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Posted 11-18-2009 at 06:09 AM by Twinkle
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I'm so sorry. For all of it.Posted 11-18-2009 at 08:19 AM by BC-3boys2luv
