AntBees

We're three days post transfer and I'm trying to do things as close to last time as possible. Every cramp I feel I'm embracing as implantation. I know it's way too soon for that to be happening, but all the other cycles, except for our last one, I feared cramping as something bad. Maybe I was sending the wrong vibes and that's why only our last cycle gave us our first positive. I don't know, but I'm trying to keep as positive as possible considering I'm scared to death.

Sometimes I think we're trying too soon after our miscarriage. My DHwas never fully on board for ttc until he first saw a heart beat (and another one seconds later). Then it was like he became a different person and was so excited about our pregnancy. He's very determined about this cycle and I didn't want to lose his support by waiting. We'll see...

On a frustrating note, my DH's niece stopped by w/her 3 month old grandson. DH specifically asked that she not stop by when we heard she was in town visiting, but she felt she knows better and I needed to see the baby. I'm not ready for babies in my life and it feels like I've stepped back months in my grieving. I have a close nephew with a newborn, and even he knows to stay away. It's stress I really don't need right now.