Am I crazy?

[babybluez]

I have a question that I am kind of embarrassed to ask. You see dh and I are both unable to have children naturally. So in Dec. we will be starting the IVF with ICSI process. Is it wrong that I want to start finishing our spare bedroom to start working on a baby's room? Am I crazy for looking at things and thinking I sholud buy it for our future child's room? I don't buy actual baby clothes or bottles or blankets, I just want to paint the room, and buy furniture. Tell me am I crazy?

[shush]

Babybluez:

I don't think that you are crazy at all. My dh and I have been doing IUIs for a while. Since it doesn't seem to be working, my doc recommends we move onto IVF with ICSI as well (our issue is male-factor). My dh's insurance will be changing in Dec. and we'll move on after Jan 1. We have been remodeling our downstairs for about 2 years now. I always assumed that by the time the downstairs bedroom was complete, we could move our guest bedroom down there and make the room next to ours a nursery. Unfortunately, IF hit and here we are with the downstairs nearing completion and no baby in sight! I too have considered painting and carpeting the room in nursery colors. I don't think that I will, 'cause it will be too sad for me if none of the procedures work to face the room everyday. For me, I think it would add to the stress, but I have definitely thought about it and you are not crazy.

[BC-Maura]

Hi there: You're not crazy at all! {{{HUGS}}} You are looking toward the future with hope and a positive attitude, which can take you a long way when it comes to ttc. When dh and I were at our lowest point in our ttc journey, we bought an old house and threw ourselves into fixing it up. The house has a number of bedrooms and as we fixed it up, we dreamed of future children that we hoped would bless us. We tried to make the rooms as neutral as possible, though, because since it was taking us a while and who knew how much longer we'd have to go, I thought that it wouldn't be healthy for me personally to be looking at rooms that looked like nurseries or kids' rooms. So we painted one room yellow and one room green and another room cream. We furnished the rooms with hand-me-downs (bureaus and twin beds) that we could either keep for later or get rid of. When we eventually were successful, as part of my nesting I wanted totally new furniture and that's when we got the crib/changing table, etc. And we ended up changing paint colors too, but hey, that's what is so great about paint -- easy to change!

So, really, you should do what gives you the most comfort. If you want to start with paint and neutral furniture, you can't go wrong. Anything that is just for a baby might be hard to look at while you're still tcc or it might help you. Only you can know that.

But you're not crazy!

All the best and let us know how things go for you!
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Maura