Filling out the Application

[cat mommy]

Ok, so we have to list our hobbies. Can anyone suggest topics I should avoid because they might be a turn off to a birth mom? I hate having to try to "sell" ourselves, but I also don't want a birth mom to be turned off by something she sees on a piece of paper when she hasn't even met us yet. I definitely won't put "posting on fertilethoughts.com down" even though it seems to be the activity I spend the most time on lately.

[ssh]

First of all, be yourself. Don't think about it as "selling yourself" but telling a bmom what makes you and dh unique. For us it involved sports - skiing, biking, hiking, walking, etc, traveling, spending time together, entertaining (love to cook and have parties), hanging out with family and friends. We also threw in some photos of us goofing around and having fun.

Once there was a thread asking why your bmom chose you... the answers were as varied as the people answering the question. I recall one because there was a pic of a dh doing something handy, or another because the adoptive mom likes to bake.

Also I would think if this is your application, it doesn't necessarily mean it is going to be shown to a bmom. I would think your agency or atty, etc would review your info and make suggestions if he or she saw anything that was a red flag. The only thing I remember being told not to show is photos of us drinking alcohol. We did have one photo from New Year's with wine on the table but that was it.

I know it is easy for me to say "don't worry" but really just go with your heart, and think of it like talking to a friend about what you like to do. Best of luck.

[HopesPromise]

I don't have time to reply right now, I am heading out for vacation. Actually dh is waiting for me in the car!! I'll get back to you next week!

[HopesPromise]

Be yourself!!! If you are uncomfortable sharing something in paricular, then don't. You don't have to devulge every single thing...they get enough info! Tell them about what you like to do, if you have particular concerns about wording feel free to ask your agency or social worker. They are on your side. PM me if I can help at all.